


The curse of the witch

by Bleu_November



Category: Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018), Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018) RPF
Genre: Blood, Blood and Violence, Europe, Eventual Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Forbidden Love, Love, Love/Hate, Memory, Paris - Freeform, Pregnancy, Prostitution, Psychological Drama, Psychological Trauma, Sadism, Spellwood, Torture, Unplanned Pregnancy, Violence, Zelda hides things, drug, mafia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-11
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:07:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 17
Words: 54,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23601301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bleu_November/pseuds/Bleu_November
Summary: We all have secrets, shameful facts that we would like to forget, but all of our secrets have to be revealed one day. Sabrina investigates the mysterious stay of Zelda in Europe which she seems to want to hide from everyone however Sabrina succeeds in finding answers which she would prefer never to have discovered.follow me on insta (@ Bleu.November) to follow the updates and other things 😊❤️
Relationships: Ambrose Spellman & Hilda Spellman & Sabrina Spellman & Zelda Spellman, Ambrose Spellman & Sabrina Spellman, Edward Spellman & Hilda Spellman & Zelda Spellman, Faustus Blackwood/Zelda Spellman, Nicholas Scratch/Sabrina Spellman, Prudence Night/Ambrose Spellman, Sabrina Spellman & Zelda Spellman, Zelda Spellman & Original Female Character(s), Zelda Spellman & Vinegar Tom, Zelda Spellman / Original Male Character, Zelda Spellman/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 68





	1. Curiosity is a bad thing

**Author's Note:**

> Hello ! This is my first fanfic and I was not sure to post but hey here I am!  
> I'd love you to leave comments for me to continue or writing tips or ideas for the future.  
> Also leave a kudos if you enjoy history😊❤️

In front of me, my reflection in the mirror of my dressing table. On closer inspection, it couldn't be said that I resemble the ideas that most mortals have of witches. Describing them as "women in general ugly, who has supernatural gifts, which she uses to do evil. Woman ugly, unpleasant, even naughty and evil. "According to their dictionary, of course, I am not an angel of gentleness and kindness, but for my part I am more than magnificent, of bewitching beauty.

I now brush my red curls in the void for no specific purpose for several minutes which seems to have lasted forever. 

Totally absorbed in my thoughts about what has become of my life, from the moment Sabrina refused to sign the Book of the Beast and finally signed it. Things have hardly become simple as before, effectively Sabrina favors her witch side but continue to cause countless problems by putting us in delicate positions in the eyes of the coven. 

I think back briefly to the moments I spent in Europe, so many memories, some pleasant but most of all bad and painful. 

It happens that I miss Europe at certain moments for a brief moment, especially freedom. "Zelds! Breakfast has been ready for 10 minutes, hurry down! "Hilda's high voice forced me out of my reverie. Reconnecting to reality, I quickly put on my black stilettos and left my room to join the kitchen.

———————————————————————————————————————

On entering I was greeted by the whole family around the kitchen table discussing joyfully on various and varied subjects. I took my usual place where my newspaper, today French, awaits me. " Hello everybody ! "- They all turned to me, Ambrose and Sabrina saying hello in unison. Hilda simply smiled at me and gave me my coffee. Sabrina and Ambrose continued their conversation while Hilda cleaned the dirty plates, for my part I read my newspaper while smoking a cigarette as usual. 

"Frankly Ambrose, I can't believe you went to Vienna! How was it ? Does it sound as wonderful as on postcards? "- Sabrina was fascinated by the stories of Ambrose -" You know I am not the person who lived the longest time in Europe, Aunt Zee lived in Europe especially in France for more than 80 years !! -But why is he talking about my stay in France! Pity Sabrina, don't ask any questions !! - "Aunt Zee !! Really ?? You never told me about your trip "" If I didn't want to talk about it, it's because I have my reasons! - I said these words with such authority that the message had to be passed - "But usually you always tell me your ....."

"If the message has not been understood, I don't want to talk about it anymore! And shit with all your questions, I'm going to be late for the academy! "- on this I took my bag and teleported to the academy, leaving them dumbstruck in front of my answer -" it's okay lamb, Zelda never wants to talk about his life in Europe. As if .... "" She's hiding a few things! "- Sabrina was coming to the conclusion that she had to find out what had happened in Europe during the passage of Zelda-" We all have skeletons in the closet! - Ambrose also seems interested in this mystery.

——————————————————————————————————————— 

When I got to the academy, I was distracted again, lost in thought about Europe. Flashbacks of blood, murder, sex and drugs came back to me in a deafening blur making me lose my bearings. On my way to my office I bumped someone. "Damn it! You can't ... "- looking up at the stranger, I saw Faustus looking at me as if I was in a fit of madness, I barely had time to apologize that Faustus quickly cut me off with deadly seriousness in his voice- "Zelda, come with me!" You are completely upset, no way your students will see you in this state! - he put his hand on my back and guided me to his desk. 

Upon entering, Faustus moved behind his desk, however, not before he had locked the door and placed a spell of silence; protecting our discussion. 

" What happens to you ? I haven't seen in this state since ... " " Since Paris and my stay in Europe! I know ! "- while speaking I paced his office without stopping and still so disturbed -" Why, are you talking about Paris again? This part of our lives no longer exists and should never be mentioned again !! Have I been clear enough? - he had said these words with such anger, it made me shiver but the last sentence resounded with your mortal who could excite me like making me tremble in terror - "it is very clear! "While facing him, I speak with a painful and flickering voice, my eyes filled with unshed tears. Seeing my condition, he walked towards me slowly and in a gesture of affection pulled me by his shoulders. 

" Let go of me ! »- at first, I struggled fiercely, waving my shoulders to get out of his grip -« Hush, I'm here! I'm really sorry for talking to you like that, I love you my love. Everything will be well ”- with his words I calm down quickly and I melt in his embrace then he gently kisses my forehead.

———————————————————————————————————————

I was still intrigued by what had happened in Europe which is forcing Aunt Zee to be so mysterious about it but I will eventually find out and that it is better than asking Prudence for help to get my answers. 

"Hi, Prudence. " -I practically ran towards her to stop her - "Hello, Sabrina. You seem to be preoccupied with something. "- I smile at the fact that she knew me too well -" Indeed, my aunt Zelda hides from us a few things about her past in Europe but I am sure that you can give me a spell to know a little everything but without that she obviously doesn't know! "- I smirked at my statement and when I saw that she returned my smile, I knew that she would help me when suddenly Nick and Ambrose came out of nowhere 

" No way you do that without me coz ! I'm also very curious "" Can I participate too? "- I smile again at their statements -" but of course Nick, you are welcome. So, how do you go about seeing all his memories of Europe? "-All while chatting we were heading to the library -" it's very simple, let's go into his memory! Once inside more than choosing the right souvenir "- I didn't really know what I was going to find out about Aunt Zelda but now I regret it very much

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follow me on insta (@ Bleu.November) to follow the updates and other things 😊❤️


	2. Time destroys everything except memory and yet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sabrina, Prudence, Ambrose and Nick manage to enter Zelda's memory. Once there, they make a strange discovery but are only at the beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there, I just wanted me to want the trip to Zelda's memory to be like this: they are looking at a single memory that is starting badly and want to leave as quickly as possible but unfortunately they are stuck until they are almost done all his memory and Zelda's memory will be in several chapters. Ah and for Zelda's past, I darkened her a lot and she got married. It's the end of the little details 😊❤️

I felt so excited to finally find out the truth. By my side, Prudence was holding a ceremonial knife which she had surely stolen from her father. Ambrose, he on my right holding a book of occult spell and finally Nicholas hiding in these hands a ball of red thread for supposedly not to get lost in the spirit of Aunt Zelda. 

So we were standing around a pentagram drawn with the blood of an animal, black candles placed at each point of the star. I spoke to break the stifling silence "Can we start?" "-Prudence nodded to say yes, I looked at the others for a sign of approval and they nodded in unison. Let the show begin, Prudence cut off all of our palms; hot blood escaped from the wide cut and we press our fist to make the blood flow more abundantly on a skull which was placed on the ground. 

Once the blood was spilled, Prudence stabbed the dagger into the top of the head, causing the candles to go out violently. It was time to recite the spell, so Ambrose began to speak - "memoria praeteritorum, et veritatem tuam in toto fieri." Fiat Nihil occultatum est ut Zelda Spellman (memories of the past, come to me in your whole truth. May nothing be hidden from us about Zelda Spellman) "- once Ambrose finished speaking we all started reciting the spell at the same time time while unrolling the red thread to pass it through our hands; which connect us all by forming a kind of misshapen circle. 

While we are reciting a strong wind it is rising accompanied by threatening clouds; the atmosphere around us changes radically and not in a more soothing place. After saying the spell twice, at the last syllable, we felt all the air that was in our lungs shrinks to zero. In one last shallow breath, we collapsed on the cold forest floor; the spell had worked our minds had deserted our bodies to reach my aunt's subconscious. I woke up in a dark place where the limits seemed to exist and where the emptiness was infinite. 

"Prudence, Ambrose, Nick where are you!" "- I was screaming at the top of my lungs until I ran out of breath but I just waiting for even a sign of their presence but in luck. Then they arrived, an expression of horror engraved on their faces. "But where were you?" »- they looked at me and I knew that their experience should not be most pleasant but after all that they answered me. Nick spoke first with difficulty - "well, we got lost I don't know how in a memory of your aunt but ..." - he seemed so shocked by what he saw that he hadn't finished his sentence, Prudence therefore took the floor to finish- “but unfortunately remembering was not an uninteresting part of his memory! No, she was standing .... ”- like Nick, she sported an expression horrified caused by this mysterious memory. Ambrose walked over to Prudence and put her hand on her shoulder to comfort her and they shared a desolate and sad look. 

"She was standing above a man with whom she was making love but just when they were going to reach their orgasms, she took a dagger and planted him in the heart several times with a look and a smile evil. Then when she reached orgasm with the man still under her. She rolled on the side removing him from her, she planted him again two dagger in his skull on each side of his head causing blood to flow and drinking it as if it were fresh water by a hot summer day. It was horrible if not so much massacre but his evil face, it looked like ... Satan who inhabited his whole being. - a silent tear escaped me when I heard what they had seen. We have to get out of here as soon as possible before horrible memories like this drive us crazy.. " Prudence, how do you get out of your memory as quickly as possible?" - I asked him so impatiently but it was so urgent. "We can't get out of her mind until we see her memories, that's the rule. - I was surprised by this rule which was unknown to me but Ambrose was surely right like often. "Okay, well, let's start now to get out of here quickly!" -We walked through the endless room in darkness without noticing anything until I don’t know how, like probably coming out of the shadows a red door contrasting sharply with the black of this place. This door seemed to attract us like a magnet but it must also be our surplus of curiosity so we approached it cautiously. 

"How can I be sure it will lead to the time of travel to Europe?" - this question had crossed me mind because after all Aunt Zelda’s mind seemed complex and we were playing tricks from the start. "No way to find out. that's the risk. ”- Nick seemed as unsure of confidence as I was in answering me, but it was too late to think about the consequences of our actions, so Ambrose was the first to come forward and pushed the door in from a distance while studying the content, but nothing was inside. Ambrose looks at us from behind his shoulder then entered, we followed him and there ... 

————————————————————————————————————

_Spellman Residence, 1920_

We were all in my house but in a different time, everything seemed weird and a feeling of ill being spread throughout my being giving me a headache. Going towards the calendar which was in the entry posed on a dresser where some family photos rested.On the calendar the words "Zelda's departure for Paris" was marked in red and surrounded.  
I continued to study my environment and my attention was caught by an imposing painting which offered a perfect example of the atmosphere which reigned in this house; an atmosphere of sorrow and grief. 

On the canvas was painted my father in a navy blue suit and his gaze was of a severity which indicated who led the Spellman clan, he hardly smiled and even seemed to judge us as if we were nothing; he frightened me so much and looked very little like the sweet and loving father I had given him over the years. At his side Aunt Hilda, she always wore her colorful clothes which gave her a unique and original style but unlike the many times I veiled her, she did not wear a warm smile that warms you from the inside; his face was serious and even almost sad. And finally Aunt Zelda who was all below Aunt Hilda and my father had put a hand on her shoulder, she seemed to be seated unlike the others who were standing. 

She wore a dress with black straps whose neckline was more than visible; to adorn his neck with a river of black diamonds with the same pair of earrings. Her gaze was identical to that of Aunt Hilda but with another emotion that I could not describe. 

“Your family seems so ... how to say!” - Nick was as bewildered as I was on how to say, I can't find the right word myself - “She seems to destroy, like dead! - Prudence had just put words on this strange sensation which emanated from this canvas and by observing a detail at greater length struck me. "Ambrose, your father is not on the picture ? However if we are well on the day of Aunt Zee's departure then he is not dead yet! - our discussion was interrupted by footsteps on the stairs. 

We turned to face the stairs because curiosity forced us to see who was the source of the noise and descended the steps with no less royal elegance; Aunt Zelda in a black dress with puffed sleeves, with her famous black stilettos, her blood red lipstick and holding a black hat also in her hand. 

Servants carried her numerous luggage behind her. No sooner had she finished going down the last step than my father and aunt Hilda, get out of the living room. "I congratulate you, Edward. You got what you wanted, after getting rid of Thomas it's now my turn! - so much anger and wickedness dripped from each of his words. "I will not get rid of you, I protect you from your continual mistakes!" - the tension between being them was almost palpable as long as it was present. "My continual mistakes? Are you kidding me ? I don't know what you're talking about! - she almost shouted while speaking, my father laughed when he heard the last sentence. "You are the person I know who causes the most problems in the world. For example sleeping with all the students of the academy, torturing the weakest wizards, practicing spells and rituals that can kill you and the list has been shortened! " "This does not justify my dismissal from this family as if I were nothing! " "It is true that these actions do not justify your leaving for Paris, but having slept with Faustus Blackwood far exceeds all your past bullshit! -Hilda walked over to Edward and placed a hand on his arm to try to calm him down from the fury that was emanating from him when he said the name of his former mentor. "Don't be vulgar, Eddie."- Aunt Hilda had said these words with one of her sweetest smiles 

"I still don’t see the problem . As for Faustus and I , that doesn’t concerne you. I am an adult! " "You and Faustus, let me laugh. You broke up recently, and moreover, he used you as a sex toy before getting engaged to Constance." "I prefer not to answer because I know very well that you assembled everything from scratch and for good reason you would like me to find a nice husband and I will become an obedient devoted wife but I am not a doll !" -Before Edward replied, a servant entered abruptly. "Excuse me but Lady Zelda your luggage is in the car and your plane will take off in 3 hours so we have to leave now to be on time. "- with a monumental sigh Zelda spoke again while putting on her hat and taking her bag" Thank you, Peter. I'm coming very soon . "- the servant left leaving them alone again. "I think it's time, little sister! "- Zelda glared at him but said nothing. She walked over to Hilda and kissed him on the cheek. "I will miss you, silly girl" -then she went to the door, the butler opened it but she did not leave immediately. 

She turned to Edward and said to him with amusement "You know Edward, I think I'm going to have fun in Paris after all it's the city of sex, good wine and party! - then she left without turning to see his expression following his declaration but to tell you he was overflowing again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know I am back earlier than expected but so many of you have read my story that I have been inspired. 😂  
> I will post the rest either Monday or Tuesday.  
> Don't forget to leave kudos if you like the story and comments because it gives me pleasure to see your reaction on the chapter 😊❤️ Bye  
> 


	3. Paris is the capital of divine temptations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sabrina and the others continue their exploration of Zelda's memories. We resume when Zelda arrives in Paris.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I'm back with a new chapter and new revelations.  
> From now on, we enter the main point. much less POV from Sabrina but almost all from Zelda. All of the chapters now are in our memories and we will come out in several chapters if you are still there. Good reading 😊❤️

Paris, 1920

I was now sitting in a Parisian taxi that was to take me to my new apartment. According to the arrondissement, my apartment was in one of the most chic and luxurious areas of Paris; I'm quite upset that Edward kicked me out of the family home, but at least he bought me an apartment worthy of the name. "We have arrived, Miss. - looking out of the window, standing in front of me, a magnificent beige building typically Parisian architecture. 

I got out of the taxi slowly while putting my hat back on and tying Vinnie Tom to his leash, the driver got out of the car to drop off my luggage at the door of the building; it is out of the question that I carry my suitcases to my apartment. This man will help me whether he likes it or not. "Monseigneur, I don't want to disturb you but my luggage is so heavy. Could you bring them up to my house? »- I made my most attractive smile and built my long eyelashes to charm him; I could use a persuasion spell, but why get tired when my charm and natural beauty can work too. 

The driver then looked at me as if I were a magnificent prize; at times I wonder if they are aware that I am handling them. So he took my luggage and we entered the hall, the building was truly magnificent: in the hall a wall of mirror, a crystal chandelier on the ceiling which had moldings at every corner. This place looked like a palace, after crossing the hall we had to climb countless marble stairs to the third floor. Finally the only door on the third floor appeared before me, not having the keys; a little spell will be useful to me. With a simple sign of the hand, the door opens and I turn to see the taxi driver carrying my suitcases at arm's length. "Put the stuff in the hall!" Thank you "- no more impatience was noticeable in my voice, he did so without question and even with a certain smile. He put them down and then looked at me while waiting for something like I was not taking the first step because I was too busy lighting a cigarette- "I ... said to myself that we could have a drink one evening?" - while facing him, I blew the smoke from my cigarette in his face. "I think you should get back in your taxi. - I returned to my apartment after slamming the door in my face. 

While continuing to smoke, I went deeper into the apartment; nothing to say, it was just great and I noticed that my furniture arrived before me, it blended perfectly with the decor. I arrived in the living room when an envelope with my name was placed on the coffee table caught my eye, I opened it and inside 600 euros in the form of bank notes but that was not all, a note of Edward. "In the envelope you will find enough cash to provide for your needs for a few weeks because you will have no rights to your fortune right away until you are married. I love you very much, Edward "-" He robbed me of all my money, I have nothing left "-I couldn't hold back all my anger when I said these words in my mouth; I head over to the phone and dial my home number. 

"Hello! It's Zelda on the phone, Peter give me my brother now. Yes I’m waiting. Hello ? you don't care about me you deprived me of my money! For my good, stop taking this bullshit out of me! But how do you want me to find money? I am a single woman in Paris with no one to support me financially! That i work? Let me laugh, no woman works except singers, whores and workers' wives. I AM A LADY, A BLOOD SPELLMAN LIKE YOU. What you leave me alone here, fuck you, asshole "- the only way to get my mind off, a party, guys, booze and maybe I'll find the solution. I go to one of my suitcases, open it gently, and turn it over to find the dress I wanted; a dark green velvet dress with drooping sleeves that leave me bare shoulders. While putting on make-up in front of my dressing table, I crushed drug pills on my chewing mirror in a gold frame and finally inhaled this powder; dangling briefly I felt better but everything is fleeting in this world. When I was ready, I teleported to one of the most prominent nightclubs. And the black out ....

———————————————————————————————————————

Paris, Le Sphinx Nightclub, 1920

I woke up in a room that looks like a streep club or a whore motel. I was naked under the white sheet of the bed, beside me a man lying on his stomach, his back covered with red eyelashes and clotted blood pleasing, a a whip still stained with blood was thrown to the ground. Looking up at the wall opposite the bed, an open black wooden cabinet exposed to many tools of all kinds for sexual domination; what the hell am I doing here! what new bullshit i did. 

Keeping the sheet against my bare chest, I looked for my underwear and my dress throughout the room; this evening must have been scorching because all my things were scattered all over the place. As soon as I was dressed I left the room, it was a nightclub: the bar with glass storage to display large bottles of alcohol at exorbitant prices like works of art. This place was one of those chic lounge bars that offer a cozy atmosphere. ... Comfortable benches and sofas replacing the chairs, the dim lights, sometimes colored but not in this one, and the diffusion of rhythmic jazz music inviting to the party. Truly a place I like to go to, I was rushing towards the exit when the bartender who was wiping cocktail glasses called out to me "Excuse me, miss, but my boss would like to chat with you. "- I was starting to panic a bit, really I have a knack for putting myself in impossible quotes, Edward may be right after all -" well, where can I find your boss? - a voice coming from behind me startled me - "I think I found you before!" - a tall man, brown and commanding respect in his black suit worth several thousand euros. 

He walked in my direction and gestured with his hand to show me two armchairs, we assaulted him in front of the other without cutting eye contact; he was so sensual in each of these movements and he embodied power, he was like Faustus and that attracted me even more to him. "Yes, I wanted to talk to you, it was to offer you a job in my nightclub. Very well paid of course! - it was my luck, there wasn’t really a lot of job opportunities for a woman. -" What type of work ? Nothing unpleasant I hope. "- he smiled at my statement -" Yesterday, I saw you at work with one of our clients who were lovers of sexual domination, when they crossed him in the morning they seemed more than satisfied with your service. So if you accept you would become the new girl of joy in this establishment but in a specific area, sexual domination, you would not have to have sex with the client just to torture him in a fairly naked outfit. You saw what I mean " " I see perfectly but your offer does not remain entirely scandalous, I am not going to come a vulgar whore for three sous! "With that I got up and left almost running ...

———————————————————————————————————————

Paris, Zelda's Apartment, 1920

"The whole world sees me as a teaser, a hottie, a whore. - I was now turning this thought over and over in my mind but no one would belittle me in my life; I'm going to get a gas job. I get up from the couch and head for the phone in a din caused by my heels on the package. 

"Hello! Yes, operator can transfer me to the job applications office. Yes, I’m waiting. Hello my lord, I am looking for a job. Not as a cleaning lady or a cook. You would not have a posted as secretary or assistant? They are no longer in power, ah! Nothing else ? No, well thank you anyway. Goodbye ”- pissed off! I spent the rest of my day on the phone with multiple companies, but no one gives work in this city, especially to a foreigner. My last hope is to succeed in convincing Edward to give me back access to the bank account, I took a deep breath And dialed the numbered house- “Hello! Hello Peter, can you please pass my brother over to me. Thank you . Hello Edward, you could go back on your desires I beg you. How come no, you asshole. I hate you "- I hung up the phone violently, I gradually felt despair overwhelm me and formed a lump in my throat. 

Tears flowed freely on my cheeks but the anger took over and in an excess of anger I exploded all the glasses of the apartment then burst into tears on the floor. I had to do it, after all sexual domination has always been one of my multiple talents ...

———————————————————————————————————————

Paris, Le Sphinx Nightclub, 1920

So I went back to this nightclub, I was no longer ashamed of the work that I was going to do because if it is the will of the Dark Lord, I accept it. No sooner have I stepped into the hall than the boss reappears in front of me with a big smile. 

"I knew you would come back to your desistions!" "- I replied with a big smile" It’s mainly the offerings are working in Paris who wouldn't run the streets for an unmarried woman. "- he indicated to me again the same armchairs as this morning and everything seemed to repeat itself except that I felt that I had lost my pride-" Signed this contract and you will work with us for the next six months each evening of the week , public holidays, end of year celebrations and everything will be! - I signed shortly after reading the contract in detail, because I didn't have to have sex with the clients. "Well welcome here, i will show you the room you will occupy, you can live here if you have no accommodation. And your outfit is already waiting for you inside! - we were going up the stairs and I realized that the room in question was that of this morning. 

Once he's gone I try on the outfit if you can say that covers a few things: a black corset with the laces on the front, a transparent black silk dressing gown, long black gloves and stilettos. Nothing that I have never worn, I sit on the bed take out a mirror from my bag to touch up my makeup. I don't know yet that I signed with the biggest monster I have ever known...

———————————————————————————————————————

I was now watching the scene unfolding before me with Ambrose, Nick and Prudence. So many things shocked me, my father letting her surrender to her own fate, the fact that this man had hired him for an abominable job or especially that Aunt Zelda is accepted that. We always watch her in front of her mirror applying lipstick, it was so painful for me to see her in this state but she endured everything to survive. "Sabrina, we must continue! We have to get out! Sabrina can you hear me? "- Nick shake me slightly to make me react but I remain frozen like a statue .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for the remarks towards the women but they are of the time so do not be too shocked. Thank you for understanding and leave a kudos if you like the story and a comment for the opinion on this chapter 😊❤️


	4. Sex is the ultimate path to self-forgetfulness up to a point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zelda's new life is deteriorating more and more but without counting these recent addictions, someone's visit can save her or make it worse...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to skip the rest of Zelda's year 1920 to be able to progress further in the story because the revelations and the interesting things happen just in 1921 so take advantage and Zelda will lose it ... you will see anyway.  
> Good reading 😊❤️

Paris, Le Sphinx Nightclub, 1921

I was lying on my bed, my body covered with black satin sheets while I was wearing nothing more than my corset, my head resting on the pillow while I drew abstract signs on it. I turned for the hour on the clock; 7:00 am, I went to bed barely 3 hours ago, if I can't sleep I can smoke a little. 

I light a cigarette that I took from the bedside table next to my bed, I think back to what happened this year, so much can we change. First of all shortly after I started working for Ivan Kamakarof, the owner of the nightclub .I had to leave my apartment and for a very simple reason, the rent was too high even with my new salary. So I moved into one of the biggest rooms in the club, when at work it is perpetual torture. 

Every night, it was a real sexual chaos, all the deviances that you can imagine, we found them in the basement of the bar, it was the dark side of ecstasy. And I found myself in its darkest corner. In this area, I had become very famous, I had become the one we would see when we wanted something more dangerous while suffering in the most delicious way. No one put on a better show than me. 

Over time, I attracted a clientele and even an audience that just liked me or even mistreating someone while masturbating, I called them the "Observers", I did not know their face because of the masks they wore nor their name but they paid a lot for the show. 

In the long run, we sell our humanity customer after customer by dint of mutilating them, flogging them, burning them or other forms of torture. In the end, I was not even Zelda anymore, I was nothing in the end just a body without any consideration for others. I felt so empty that I was drowning in alcohol, drugs while smoking constantly, I can’t find any other solution. I've almost deserted the face of the earth for everyone, I haven't spoken to my sister or brother since the last time we argued over the phone over money. 

After a while, Edward contacted the police for the fact that I had mysteriously disappeared for seven to eight months now because I have not been given my new number, I was no longer their sister as I said I was nothing. Once my cigarette was finished, I fell back to sleep.

————————————————————————————————————————

I woke up around 10 am because of the noise coming from the bar, considering the hour everyone had to eat lunch or Ivan was mad at one of these vulgar stupid whores. I get up and take a cold shower, I feel the jet of cold water on my face, gradually chasing away my torments from last night, I still see them screaming in pain, screaming but they thanked me in their breaths. 

Coming out of the bathroom, I put on one of my Gucci dresses, one of the last things that gives me similar respectability. 

Once ready, I go down to the main room where a long table was placed every morning to accommodate all the employees so that we can have breakfast . You could hear Ivan in the background, getting angry at the person on the phone. 

"But look who's getting up earlier than expected, Lady Zelda! Are you dressed in a Gucci dress? But its costs a small fortune! "- Lana was one of the people I tolerated speaking to myself in this tone, after all she was my best friend and sometimes a partner in bed. "Well, I got up earlier because some yelled on the phone!" "- I glanced at Ivan who wants to say it all -" and for my dress, I got it offered by a client !- I was not going to tell them that I went to Gucci and I persuaded the employees with a spell to get me this dress and other luxury items.

I sit next to Lana and have my coffee with my newspaper; It didn't all change in the end. 

We were all eating breakfast calmly when Ivan slammed the phone, shouting insults in Russian. "What is happening? - I absolutely wanted to know why he was hurting my breakfast which is one of the only moments of calm, he turned around and walked in my direction apparently irritated by my question. 

"I have a business on the phone earlier in the morning, they want to book the club for 50 people with all the services!" "- everyone was delighted but I felt there was one but " So where is the problem? "The problem is that the boss of this company wants to have sex with you, Zelda" - I think back to my contract, one of the good things that Ivan had done to me was to have created this clause to prevent my clients from soak up their junk but that depends on the money he offers me. "How much is he asking for just for the night?" "- Ivan looks at me as if I proposed to commit an odious act in spite of his consideration, he answers me calmly. "He offers 2,500 euros but is ready to go up to 3,000 euros, you know that you did not have to do it, your contract does not allow it. "

If I hadn't known him for a year, I would almost say that they want to protect me. 

"I do what I want with my body! I'm sorry to speak to you in this tone but I need this money and can be canceled by reservation if we do not accept his request. On what I will prepare and take care of our torture room, after all you have to be waiting for your money! "- I get up from my chair, putting out my cigarette and I head for the stairs that lead to my room

————————————————————————————————————————

Le Sphinx Nightclub, 11 p.m.

The party was in full swing, the main hall was full of drunk men arguably arguing about politics or working with a whore on their knees. 

I go down the stairs in my usual clothes of work and head to the bar for a glass of whiskey. "Jean, make me a double whiskey, please" "Immediately, princess" - he prepared my glass for me and I drank it suddenly, I felt the amber liquid burn my throat. I felt a hand touch my face, caressing my cheek with love. 

"Hey, don't drink too much! I remind you that if you don't want to do it, you don't have to." - I turned to Ivan, and removed his hand from my cheek. he was behaving strangely towards me these days, but I haven't been paying too much attention so far. "Ivan, can you tell me what's wrong with you? I mean you are more and more protective of me." "Frankly, I don't think this is the place or the time to tell you!" - I roll my eyes masterfully while determining my second glass of whiskey. 

"You know, if you don't have the courage to tell me that you have feelings for me, you don't even have to mother me!" "- and with that I went to the basement, where my client should have expected me. 

You could hear but stiletto heels echoing on the floor, I walked the corridors with deadly calm not paying much attention to the lustful moans coming from the different rooms. The door to the torture chamber was facing me, before entering, I took one last drag of nicotine on my cigarette and threw it casually, crushing it with my shoe. I opened the door, the man was back to me, sitting on a leather chair with a glass of vodka barely started. I go to the cupboard, and choose the whip as my weapon of choice, I turn around and go towards him but I am stopped by his hoarse and authoritarian voice but above all more familiar. 

"Tonight you belong to me body, soul and spirit. I don't want to hear you talk and from that moment on your name will be Zelda, Zelda Spellman! - and there, when he pronounced my name I knew who he was. "Faustus! - he must have recognized my voice because he is quickly lifted from the chair to face me, our regards crossed and did not come off until my vision became blurred because of the tears which flow profusely on my face. 

We haven't moved for ages, seeing each other after all these times was almost like immense sorrow for me, devouring myself from inside because reminds me that I had lost my life luxurious, my friends, my pride and of course him, I could have been married to Faustus for a long time but obviously I never had the right to happiness. 

He broke the stifling silence by taking me in his strong arms, nothing was more important for the moment, I forgot where we were and why we were. 

"I thought I would never see you again.I looked for you all over Paris, in your apartment, but told me that you neither lived anymore. Edward told the Coven that you were dead! But there you are! Besides, what are you doing here, it's a mess. Do you work here? "- I smiled sadly at him, I suspected that he was going to ask questions at some point but I would not have hoped so soon anyway anger quickly took over. 

" I work in this brothel yes! I'm the whore you ordered to entertain you! I ask you to speak to me with a little more respect!" - I was so mad at him, he only reappears now and then he openly judges my new life. " How did you get there, my little demon? Being in this place is unacceptable, and have you seen how you are dressed like a prostitute!" - I release myself from his embrace and go farthest from him, he started to destroy me again. "I forbid you to continue! " -I couldn't take it any longer, I needed drugs as soon as possible. I walked over to the cupboard and got a bottle of scotch tape and a small box of white pill, I got to the table and ground the white pills to powder. 

"What are you doing here? You are not going to take drugs now, we must discuss! "- I continue my task by inhaling the cocaine, then turned to the scotch to simply get drunk until I forget. "Zelda, drop that bottle of alcohol! At once! We're going back to Greendale and everything will be the same as before you left, you and me, together forever! "- I wanted so much to believe that I will find everything I lost but it was too late, the damage was done I am broken, nobody can repair me after this hell. 

"But Zelda has been dead for a long time, there is nothing left alive in me. Just a broken person constantly working to get enough drugs to stop thinking about what I do every day!" "But I'm here now for you, to help you get out of here! I'm begging you stop hurting yourself!" - Faustus wanted to save me too much that he didn't even realize that I was suffering from his presence here. He kept on supposedly trying to reason with me but I don't listen to him anymore, these words, I heard them but not clearly as if I were underwater. I was currently drinking scotch from the bottle, my condition must have been pitiful from the outside, a very beautiful woman getting drunk in a sexual torture room with her former lover talking to her like a disobedient child. It was too much ! 

"Everything you say is a lie. You and your words, your promises." "But what happens to you! Alcohol and drugs make you say these excruciating things, look at me everything will be fine."- he walked towards me and as usual he tried to calm me down by taking me by the shoulders. I suffered because of its strong hold. 

"Let go of me now! Don't say a word! I carry the weight of my actions every day but I don't have to bear you! Come out of my life, Faustus. Do you hear what I tell you? I don't want you anymore! You are nothing for me! You died for me! That's all !"- I see him start to get angry violently, suddenly he broke the bottle with his mind and made all the furniture in the room shake. "You want to get rid of me, but it won't be so easy! I am one of the last people who supports you and who loves you more than anything so I will not leave you there especially in this state!"

"Disappear, specter of my past, of my stupidity. Return to your hell and leave me to mine! "- I looked him in disgust in the eyes and I think I scared him. "You are not my Zelda! " - he left a business card on the coffee table and left, but not before he had said a last word. "If you want to get your life back by my side, you have my number on the card. Goodbye Zee, I will miss you. - once the door was shut, I collapsed into sobs on the chair. 

I am a monster, I am a horrible person but if I hurt him with my problems, I will never forgive myself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do not think that Spellwood is finished just a little confusion of couple do not panic! Leave a kudos if you like the story and comment on the chapter it would make me very happy 😊❤️


	5. The fire that seems to be extinguished often sleeps under the ashes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New incident upsets Zelda and pushes her down a path where misfortune awaits her on all sides

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear reader, if you hated Ivan before, there you will want to kill her 😂

Paris, Le Sphinx Nightclub, 1921

I was still in the leather chair where I collapsed crying after the departure of Faustus, but unlike earlier I had no more tears shed, no more sadness, no more guilt for them awful things I told him. I didn't feel anything, just the urge to drink vodka, I wanted to forget it but even absolutely all the alcohol would not drive it out of my mind. A cry of horror brought me back to reality. At first, I paid very little attention to it until it grew louder and the screamer started knocking vigorously on the door and begging me to open it. 

"Open me, Zelda!" I recognized her voice directly, Lana. I opened the door for her but she fell to the floor directly when the door was no longer there to support her. His leg was broken in a sinister way, his bone had pierced the skin which left the leg twisted. Blood flows freely from the deep wound and a trail of blood accompany it in its movements. I rushed to his side, she was too weak to survive this injury, I detected other injuries all over her body some deep and some superficial. 

Even my magic could not save her from her death which became inevitable from second to second, she spoke with difficulty. "He will kill us all! Ivan has gone completely crazy, he has killed all the girls, Zelda! He's a wizard, he has done things that go beyond the limits of reality! - a few minutes after her last words, she died in my arms, staring at the ceiling in a vacuum. I left him lying on the ground and decided to go out, if Ivan was really a warlock, I would have no trouble handling him. It was a real massacre, bodies lay in the narrow corridors of the cellar, which forced us to step over them one by one. 

I arrived quickly at the main room, it was filled with bodies of customers and whores lying on the ground in their pools of blood, I scanned the room and saw Ivan sitting on the armchair of our first meeting while sipping a whiskey quietly as if nothing had happened. I advance sensually towards him and sit on the arm of the armchair, he looks at me calmly while continuing to drink his glass, we continued to look at each other without saying anything then I decide to break the silence after long minutes . 

"So, are you a warlock? I can feel it now! I had felt an obscure force emanating from you but I would never think of that!" "Well, for my part, I always knew who you were and what you were capable of! I let you know that from evening, you belong to me!" - I roll my eyes masterfully and take a cigarette from my pocket, light it, take a puff of nicotine and blow it in his face. 

"I'm sorry to contradict you but I don't belong to anyone! You men are stupid, I don't need you in anything!" - my tone was as cold as the arctic cold but he ignored it and replied with an aggressiveness that I have never seen at his place. "You are all mine! Give me your confidence, kneel before me and swear loyalty to me. As Lilith served Lucifer, you will love me, help me in my work and do what I want! In return, I offer you power, wealth and my love if you do all this for me! Did you understand me correctly? I am now your master! "- It was at that moment that I realized, that I did not know him but he judged me badly if he believed that I would easily submit to his will. 

"I think you've gone totally crazy if you think I'm going to bow to all your whims!" - I saw a sadistic smile appear on his face and I knew that I had just made a serious mistake and that I was going to regret it bitterly. "Ohh! But you will comply because otherwise you will die here! Like the less than nothing you have become! "- and to show me the truth of his words, he deprives me of oxygen by holding his hand up and squeezing my throat in the void. I have noticed that oxygen deprivation affects my limbs by stiffening them then at the time when I was going to succumb, he released its grip. I breathed quickly, trying to calm my breathing. 

"I think you accept the terms of this new life by my side!" - I simply nodded in response, put a hand to my sore throat and rubbed in reflex. He got up and went around the armchair to find himself next to me, he was probably waiting for me to look him in the eyes but as I did not do so, he took my chin with his fingers and forced me to look him in her brown eyes colder than anything that can be imagined. "You will prepare your luggage quickly!" We are going to go elsewhere, to Russia! "- and he left, leaving me alone in the room in deadly calm. 

I did what he said and packed my bags, taking all my clothes and jewelry in many suitcases. I changed as quickly as possible and put on the black dress with puffed sleeves that I had worn when I left Greendale and took my black hat. Vinnie Tom was more than agitated by this sudden departure but did not ask a question and followed me wisely until the exit. I intended to go far away before I had to stay with him. 

"Lanuae Magicae" - nothing, I didn't even Apparate to another room. "Lanuae Magicae" - still nothing, it's impossible, I'm one of the most powerful witches in the world why don't I teleport? I was going to get my answer very quickly. "You really think I'll let you go, I linked you to me! Where I go, you go it's as simple as that!" - hearing her voice, I turned to the source. He was at the top of the stairs and descended quickly to join me. "I suppose you are ready to go to Russia? We will start the trip by car then we will end it by teleporting directly!" - he took my bags and headed for the exit, I followed him closely with Vinnie Tom on a leash. I was serene outside but panicked behind my indifference mask, I was probably going to become some sort of slave for him but I will find a way to get rid of him. It's just a matter of time ! 

When we arrived in the usually noisy street but peacefully asleep at night, a black Mercedes limousine with tinted glass patiently awaited us. Seeing Ivan arrived, the driver got out of the car and went to take the suitcases from Ivan's hands, he placed the suitcases in the trunk and opened the back door for me so that I could enter but one question remains open and I decide to express it out loud. "The police will know that we are the ones who killed the people inside if we escape ! How do you plan to solve this problem, Ivan?" "Don't worry, I'll take care of that!" - that night, the Sphinx nightclub caught fire before my eyes. While burning, it was not only The Sphinx which went up in smoke but the only place where I could say that I was a minimum in safety and its it had destroyed it at the same time, it had murdered the last people who knew that I was still alive because I do not know if Faustus is still alive but strangely I feel that he is alive. 

Faustus’s business card also caught fire with my hope of saving me from this hell on earth that my life has become. 

We got into the limousine, I looked through the window at the flames consumed throughout the building. That night, it was not only the nightclub, not all the bodies of the victims or the Faustus business card who succumbed to the flames but above all my hopes for freedom and happiness. 

The car drove for long hours, I felt my eyelids close and sleep won me over. " Come here ! - Ivan had made a gesture towards the place next to him, I didn't trust him but I didn't want to upset him so I got closer to him. He took me in his arms and kissed my upper head, I pressed my head against his chest and fell asleep quickly.

———————————————————————————————————————

I woke up a few hours later in the same position. I opened my eyes slowly and he saw it hovering over me, watching me as if I were the sixth wonder of the world. We didn't talk for a while but the atmosphere was not strange but oddly comfortable and pleasant. "Can I ask you questions? After all I need to know the person I have trusted." - I was obviously lying about the fact that I had given him my confidence. 

"I have no problem with you asking me questions, but be careful what you want to know." - he said those words like he was carding me against something. "I would like to know why did you kill everyone who was in the nightclub? You didn't have to do it! " "Certainly, I didn't have to do it but your dear friend Faustus Blackwood attacked me when I came out of the torture room saying that I was destroying you and forcing you to do your inhuman work. In short, we fought with our powers and the mortals we witnessed our capabilities. They were going to tell everyone so I killed them to protect us. Another question ? "- when he said it, it seemed logical. I would surely have done the same thing as him. 

"Did you say I should help you with your work? Are you going to redo a nightclub in Russia? "" In truth, I don't work in brothels! I am a godfather of one of the most powerful Russian mafia in the world. I would like you to become my partner and my right arm, I know how you are. You are a bright, confident, ambitious, proud woman and who is not afraid of difficulties. I have waited all my existence for a companion worthy of me and the burden that will fall on her, and it is you that I want by my side! "

"I must admit that I would appreciate such an influential place but what are the advantages, being the companion of a mafia is not without risk." 

"Of course, there are risks as in everything but minimal compared to what I offer you. A position naturally influences but not that, a huge fortune that I have and to which you will have access, being my partner will protect you from forced marriages and persecution against single women. Personally, I will give you my affection and will never go wrong if you also do it of course! "- while we were talking, I realized that his offer was not infamous but more than pleasant. I will find again, a luxurious life and the respectability of being the wife of a powerful man. Power has always been one of the characteristics that attracted me to someone. 

"I must tell you that if the life you describe is true then I will not murder you in your sleep! "- I snuggled deeper into his arms and went back to sleep, head on his chest and he pulled me closer to him then laid his head on mine and fell asleep. 

In my head, I assumed that by charming him, I could benefit from his power to build personal glory. But as in all the things that happen to me in my life, I was wrong. I got the glory but at what cost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted the relationship between Zelda and Ivan to reflect some sort of Lucifer / Lilith relationship or something like that, but Faustus will obviously reappear because Spellwood is life but we are going to have fun with Zelda / Ivan for a few chapters. Tell me in a comment if I did a toxic relationship well or if I need to improve 😊❤️


	6. The mouth says "yes", the heart says "no"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zelda seems to have got used to the life of mafia companion despite the risks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm back with a new chapter! we're finally going to see Zelda in action with a mobster and Ivan's cruelty to his wife.  
> Good reading 😊❤️

Saint-Petersburg, Demeure Kamakarof, 1921

I think I will never remember the moment I first saw Ivan’s home. It had nothing to do with my family home in Greendale or my Parisian apartment. The house was quite far from the city center which allowed it to be sheltered from prying eyes, it looked like a palace by its architecture which displayed the wealth of the family through the elaborate moldings with white exterior walls, the large white windows overlooking the park which surrounded the house and the woods surrounding the entire property, the statues and marble fountains in the gardens or the slightly distant stable on a hill. This place had nothing to envy to the other properties that exist in the world, this house was sublime. 

When I got out of the car that day, I was greeted by servants arranged in line on both sides of the main aisle which led to the heavy double wooden entrance door. With Ivan at my side, we went up the aisle until we were stopped by a round woman who came out of the row and greeted us with a big warm smile. "Welcome to Kamakarof Manor, miss! Can I will drive you to your room where you can cool off before dinner. "

At this precise moment, I should have fled at the risk of being killed, but even death would have been far sweeter than the atrocities which happened to me and which were committed in this magnificent house which will become in my eyes a prison. . Even if the prison is golden, it is still a prison

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Saint-Petersburg, Demeure Kamakarof, 1923

The hot water of the bubble bath gradually relaxes my muscles and drives away my torments at the same time, I rub a sponge on my body bruised by the blows given to me by Ivan when he thinks I am cheating on him, flirts with others or upset him too much. I continue to rub my bruises and wounds while pronouncing a healing spell to make them disappear faster. The bathroom is, I believe, one of the only places where Ivan leaves me without the supervision of one of his bodyguards or a servant. Like every time I am alone in my bath, I try to purify myself by a little spell. 

"If I am cursed today, let the water wash away all my troubles! "- I repeat it frantically for long minutes when violent knocks on the door push me to stop, the author of these knocks has no one but Ivan. 

"Zelda! Get out of this bathroom immediately! -I got out of the water as quickly as possible and went out of my room in a bathrobe to get into the chamber. As I expected, he was out of his mind for a reason still unknown but which I will soon find out. 

"What were you doing ? "He grabbed my arm aggressively and pulled me violently towards him. "I was taking a bath, is it a crime in this house?" - he was more pissed off by my answer and a dangerous gleam shone in those brown eyes. He tightened his grip tightly on my arm; if I don't stop it now, it could escalate in seconds. "You know very well that I'm not talking about this! I heard you talk to someone and don't lie to me! "

"I was talking to Vinnie Tom. There is nothing to worry about, Ivan. »- I touched his face emotionally and put my forehead against hers, we closed our eyes to take advantage of this moment of calm. He gradually releases his grip on my arm; I’ve managed to channel it again for now. "You know I love you more than anything! How sorry I am for inflicting anger on you! You forgive me ? - I will never forgive him for inflicting these blows, these tantrums or perpetual jealousy but again, my mouth says "yes" and my heart says "no". 

"Of course I forgive you, don't worry! - he said nothing and I guess the situation is under control. He opened his eyes gradually and then removed his forehead and his hands from my waist, moving away from me to leave our room. Before opening the door, he dropped a sentence to which I only react afterwards. 

"I know when you lie and this time again you do it! Do not lie to me in any case or you will eventually succumb to the fall one day. "- I faced him and squinted in puzzlement, he raised his arm and made a dismissive gesture with his hand so I was thrown through the window behind me and fell. 

The window pane was smashed into a thousand pieces under my touch and these same pieces of glass accompanied me in my dizzying fall, I land on my back in the snow that had recently fallen in the park. I vaguely remember how I felt when I touched the ground, maybe a pain in the spine but I don't think, the feeling of cold snow on my skin barely covered that by my bathrobe but I only felt the touch of a tear running down my cheek and the feeling of drowning in a sea of despair. 

A servant found me seconds after I fell. " Mrs ! Do you hear me ? Madam, hang in there, I'm going to get help! »- I forced myself to remain conscious yet I wanted to let go and leave this world. "Hurry up... I'm dying..."And he went off alerting the others to help me, a short time later, a small group of servants ran in the snow to me. 

One of them transported me inside and once carefully placed on the living room couch, they rushed to my bedside giving me multiple care to keep me alive and repair my spine surely break by the fall because I could only move to watch the scene unfolding in front of me. A spell was pronounced and immense pain overwhelmed me from the inside of my being, my bones fell back into place by themselves, I shouted piercing and twisted as the pain was great. I couldn't take it anymore and passed out. 

———————————————————————————————————————

I woke up in my bed, my body was no longer painful and I could move without difficulty. I rang the bell that was put on the bedside table to warn my servants that I wanted a few things. Quickly, the housekeeper arrived with a smile on her face . 

"It's a pleasure to see that you seem to be getting better. What can I do for you, madam?» « Janet, I would like you to warn Max that I want him to get the car out because I want to go somewhere and that you call the hairdresser and the makeup artist as well as my maid to help me prepare myself. "Will it be all?" "No, could you bring me the phone?" - she nodded and slipped away for a second, then came back on the phone. 

She left to manage my requests, I dialed the desired number on the dial. "Allo! Hello, Hilda. How are you ? I'm fine, don't worry about me and my husband. Ivan is the most charming husband you can meet. I would love to see you again but France is far from Greendale and Ivan is working very hard at the moment so later. I miss you too ! I love you very much . I'll call you back in the week. Goodbye ! "- I hang up sooner than expected with Hilda because a knock on the door had warned me of the arrival of the servants. 

" Entrance ! - the servants came in and started their work. While the hairdresser brushing my hair, I wonder if lying to Hilda about my life is a good thing but it is my best solution so that I do not involve her and Edward in my worries. One hour, I was made up with a thick line of black eyeliner, a thin layer of mascara because my eyelashes are long and thick naturally and to finish my more than famous lipstick red blood and had left my hair free. I wore a suit and a matching Gucci skirt, a white shirt and black stilettos. 

Once I checked myself one last time in the mirror, I take my bag and leave for the car.

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Saint-Petersburg, Demeure Baranov, 1923

I stood in front of the villa of Serguei Baranov, a mobster that Ivan had upset by deceiving him on a big drug deal. I came to make it clear that if he pissed me off a bit, I would put a ball between his eyes. I was greeted by the butler who led me into his boss's office, I returned and the butler slammed the double door behind me. 

Seiguei was obviously not there, I begin to analyze my environment to identify my new subject of torture. Its interior was fairly classic with very little apparent richness, a mirror cabinet filled with alcohol and the classic: a photo of each member of his family on his desk. This man must have been of deadly boredom, it is to wonder why he became who he is, according to his style of decoration he would be better in accounting or another profession of little importance. 

"I see you studying my interior, Mrs. Kamakarof !" - his voice came out of nowhere, almost making me jump. I turned to him so that I could continue this conversation and identify the man I was dealing with here, as I predicted, he was banal without much charm and did not inspire any fear in me either. "I would like you to avoid calling me Mrs. Kamakarof. I hate being assimilated to my husband! Call me Zelda, I prefer." "Well, Zelda, what was so important for the sad red-haired killer to honor me with her magnificent presence?" - this man did not care at all about me and I will not allow it, he will pay the price of these actions against me. 

"To tell you the truth, Mr. Baranov, I'm here to tell you to get out of my way. I don't allow my transactions to be disrupted by an asshole who can't stand defeat! I repeat, get out of my way or I stick a ball between the two eyes, to you and your cute little family! "- like every time I impose myself with my demands, men react very badly to female authority, especially the mafia. 

"I will not accept a dirty whore talking to me like this in my own house! Security, come and escort Madame Kamakarof to the exit! I think she's having a hysterical fit!" "You have just made the biggest mistake of your life by calling me hysterical and speaking to me with no less respect than you would talk to a whore, Mr. Baranov! »- at the end of my sentence, two bodyguards entered. They advanced towards me but I stopped them net ; we're going to play a bit, poor stupid boys. 

"I order you to shoot yourself in the head now!" - the weaker of the two, could not bear the grip that my mind exerted on him and did so immediately, his body hertzing the ground in an infernal din. 

I walked over to the second bodyguard who sweats so much he resisted my presence in his mind. A thin thread of blood escapes from his nose, it was his body that was dying little by little. "The more you resist, the more you suffer! Let me relieve you of this pain in your head." - just with those words, he let me control him and shot himself in the head. 

"Now it's your turn, Mr. Baranov! But you won't die right away, I exactly wanted a new toy! "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to leave a kudos if you like the story and comments to give me ideas for the future 😊❤️


	7. How sweet is revenge on a woman's mind!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zelda commits vile acts to recover the Baranov family’s drug empire with the help of Ivan. Curious eyes spy on the property and seem to be looking for something or maybe someone ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here I am again! I'm sorry I didn't publish a chapter last week because I had a very common illness, THE LAZINESS 😂

Saint-Petersburg, Demeure Kamakarof, 1923

You could hear the thumpy sound of drops of water trickling through the humid and cold room, producing a sound that can seem relaxing during the first minutes then it becomes a real torture, making you lose track of time and your mental health by the same opportunity . 

The pale candlelight dimly lit Serguei's sweaty face, for him days were spent alone in this room but in truth only a few hours. He was tied securely to an iron chair by the wrists as well as his forearms and ankles, the sound of Zelda's stilettos and the acrid smell of cigarettes aroused a feeling of fear that began to flood his body. 

"You don't have to suffer needlessly, to struggle while you die anyway here! You will weaken in a short time and I will kill you slowly making you suffer in all the ways that I like but if you beg for my mercy and obediently signed the document that will give me your drug empire, I will warn of magnanimity towards you ! " I struttered sensually around him, taunting him with a smug smile etched on my face. Nothing would stop me in my quest for power and blood, especially this idiot. 

I was facing her now, our eyes met and I could detect pure fear creeping into these irises, I knew at that moment that I had won and I could not hold back a sly smile invading me. 

"I will sign your contract but I want a quick and painless death! But in no case would I beg your pity, you dirty whore! "-I went to the next table where the contract was rested, a few minutes later I had what I wanted but my thirst for blood is not yet satisfied. I grab the dagger that I had hidden in my black leather boots and planted it in him leg, letting him scream in pain. 

I reveled in his painful scream which seemed to me music to my ears, my murderous urges insisted on setting up a most controversial plan to get rid of his body. I took the dagger from his thigh and he moaned in response. 

"You promised to kill me quickly and painlessly!" -This man was more stupid than I thought! - "I give you one last piece of advice before your death, never trust a woman especially if she is thirsty for revenge! " "Why are you torturing me? It doesn't bring you anything! I only know you in the business world and I have never been offended until recently... "-I could not help laughing but a laugh devoid of joy, it rings in the ear like that of a madwoman in the middle of a crisis. And there my control over my emotions left at the same time as the hope of Serguei's face. 

"You still haven't understood? As I say to the previous ones, I don't hate you to the point of torturing you but ... how to explain yourself simply? I arrived at a time in my life when life is tasteless, aimless with hindsight death may be a good solution! I no longer have a feeling for anyone except a murderous thirst that invades me and I must therefore satisfy it! I don't want to die but I don't want to live like that . I just want to feel .... I just want to feel something .... something really real so that I can really feel like a normal person again and the blood and the power make me feel be whole! "- hysterical tears crushed my vision but I quickly tried them and regained control of my emotions. 

"I'm pitiful! Since when do I speak to my prey? "- with a precise and rapid gesture, I cut his throat. Leaving it emptied of ruby red liquid with the characteristic metallic odor.  
"Janet! Janet! "- my servant ran immediately from the next room and was now in the doorway of the heavy iron door. 

"What can I do to serve you, ma'am?" "Take Mr. Baranov's body into the kitchen and you know what you have to do! I do not want to be done in a hurry! " " I'll get started right away! - I left the room but not without leaving a last look at the lifeless body of Serguei who is bathed in a pool of blood at these feet.

———————————————————————————————————————

The kitchen worktop was smeared with the blood of Mrs. Zelda’s victim, members were scattered all over the place and I was working on removing the pulpit and removing the skin and bones. 

"Do you think she's really going to do this tonight? I mean it's more than cruel what she intends to do. "-I stopped in my task and turned to my college. 

"It is not for us to judge what they are doing, Lucia! We just have to do what they want, we get paid a lot to do that so you better shut up!" - I resumed my work and he, while the pulpit so that she would chop it, she took the chopper and finally started to work. For a while we work efficiently and silently until something or rather someone distracts us. 

"Aren't you finished with the meat yet? Dinner starts in three hours and the meat needs time to cook! " "Well, we would have ...." - a beautiful voice stopped me in my sentence and we all got ear to listen to Mrs. Zelda singing in the music room above. 

" I pity her, Mrs. Zelda! "- we all looked at Lucia with astonishment, very few people feel sorry for Madame and for good reason she scares most people. " I pity her because she is forced to live with this monster who is her husband, moreover the fact that she is so alone in a country that is not hers. It saddens me !" "We have to get back to work quickly because the monster who serves as our boss will fire us if we haven't finished and you know we can't leave here with information against them so we'll end up like this man ! "

————————————————————————————————————————

Saint-Petersburg, Kamakarof Residence, 10 p.m.

The sound of the guests' voices brought me back to the present moment. I put my white stilettos there and went down to join the festivities; Let the party begin! 

I descend the large marble staircase which overlooked the entrance hall and at these feet, my husband chatting calmly with the two Baranov sons accompanied by their mother. "Madame Kamakarof, you are magnificent! If I had known that dining would be so chic I would have worn a cocktail dress like you." -I stood in front of Mrs. Baranov and gave her a charming smile. 

Like her husband, this woman was banal, she was the exact image of the good little wife with pink cheeks and the false smile taped on her face. 

"Don't say that, you too are very beautiful, and to tell you the truth, this white dress dates back centuries!" - the conversation continued for too long for my taste and on irrelevant platitudes, it has nothing to say except about these children, her husband and these friends of the book club. 

The men are put in a room and were talking about politics, business and of course the subject that every mafia godfather or other men like to talk about: women. It was too much for me, we had to eat to finish this transaction as soon as possible."I saw with the servants and the meal is ready. If you don't mind following me to the dining room. "

We entered the dining room, a large room of immaculate white illuminated by a crystal chandelier, in the center a long rectangular table of light wood set with beautiful porcelain vessels. Not far from the table, a servant pushed a chariot where our steaming dishes awaited under a bell, the smell of which intoxicated the room. 

We assisted each other on one side of the table: the Kamakarof on the right and the Baranov on the left facing each other. Our dishes were presented specially in front of us, revealing a most succulent roast. "Your roast is very delicious, I see that you are spoiling us! But let's talk about the case Mr. Kamakarof, my father has been missing for several hours now and you said on the phone that you would tell us where he is then we are waiting for an answer!" -One of Baranov's sons had broken the silence while we were eating the meat, forcing us to lift our heads from our plates and give him our attention. 

"To answer you, your father is in our possession and it will only be returned to you if you give me the remaining 50% of your business! Serguei has already given me that 50%! Do as I say and everything is will be well, my husband and I guarantee it! - the Baranovs look at me as if I came from the insultor or worse but they are my conditions to recover recovered the rest of their father. 

"Mr. Kamakarof, you better keep on a leash, the whore that everyone knows she's sleeping with most gangsters and that you call your wife!" -An immense rage overwhelmed me but I couldn't kill them anyway before they signed the fucking contract. In this situation, a kind of persuasion would be useful to me, I would concentrate my mind on the fact to fold them at my will. "You are going to sign this contract!" -I handed them the paper, possessed by my mind they signed it one by one and I released my grip. "We want our father now that you have as you want, whore sale!" - I didn't even have to explain to them that their father had finished roasting on their plates, as Mrs. Baranov bit into her husband's phalanx bone with his wedding ring on it. 

"I see that you have found your husband as planned Mrs. Baranov! You will excuse my wife for not to have warned you that Serguei had died long before your arrival! This meeting is coming to an end, you will not need to be escorted to the door. "-At the end of his sentence our bodyguards came out of nowhere and cut their throats from behind with the cutlery. 

"I told you my plan was brilliant! I'm tired, I'm going to bed! We will get rid of the bodies tomorrow! Janet clean up the mess and I don't want a single drop of blood on the tablecloth anymore." - and I am withdrawn from the room behind me, my husband sitting in front of the bloody bodies, he was drinking a glass of whiskey with his mask of indifference put on his face in the face of the situation.

————————————————————————————————————————

The next morning, we threw the bodies in the frozen pond. During the winter, the fish will eat them little by little, getting rid of their decomposing remains before the ice melts. Nothing can be more perfect than a winning ploy and a quenched thirst for blood. 

I was standing next to Ivan in front of the pond, watching our bodyguards threw the cold bodies in the water. 

"Never do that again! I don't want you to get your hands dirty unless I ask you to!" "And what are you going to do if I continue to manage the drug cartel!" -He looked away from the horizon and gives me a look of pure contempt. 

"You'll listen to me or I'll throw you alive in the pond! How long does it take to die freeze? Your beauty forever frozen in the ice! "

Without the couple realizing that two presences hidden in a bush deliberately spied on them, they continued to argue. "We finally found them! The powerful Kamakarof couple who terrorize the world of drugs and prostitutes. Gabriel, after months of research with interpole, we will be able to send them behind bars forever! "

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My aunt had changed a lot since she came to Europe but I think that despite this, she was bad inside, the evil was already deeply rooted in her. I will no longer be able to look her in the eyes without thinking back to her sinister look and without emotion when she cut her throat. 

"I can't bear to watch it anymore! Its must stop! Ambrose, are you sure we can't go out? "We're trapped here, Sabrina!" Aunt Zelda’s mind is that we suffer for daring to enter here and her whole life is a farce, she who said she had just lived in Europe to study magic in different ways! Rubbish! Nothing but lies! "- Her whole life is a lie, but who is she really? Nothing is certain anymore ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may have problems writing often because I have resumed classes but I will not let you down 😊❤️


	8. A long life leads to long suffering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An event that Zelda has always wanted for a long time turns into a nightmare but ultimately not really ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I must warn you that this chapter will talk about rape so even if I was kind enough not to make it too violent, if you are not comfortable do not read the first part. Good reading 😊❤️

Saint Petersburg, Demeure Kamakarof, 1923

I hate nothing more than social evenings, nothing but the concept of strutting around like a peacock in evening dress and making forced smiles all along the boring discussions with so many idiotic idiots as well as devoid of 'intelligence, it revolts me. However, I was forced from childhood to participate in these stupidities. I’ve always tried to get away from it but I’m forced to start going again.

Tonight, Ivan decided to invite most of the most influential mobsters and their wives to a sumptuous reception in the ballroom to show them our power and our fortune. However I was not really aware of the agitation which surrounded me, people laughed, danced, discussed cheerfully but I looked at them as I looked at beings to which I do not belong, to which I was I was superior in every way. I got tired of watching them and take me away from them

I advanced still lost in my thoughts along the large gallery where enthroned marble statues and the beautiful mirrors reflected the rays of the full moon. A man was walking in the same corridor as Zelda, seeing him at the other end of the corridor, he thought that this woman was very attractive apart from her splendid bewitching beauty, her spirit was just as superb. 

In addition to the golden red curls that look like the summer sunset, chiseled facial features and emerald green eyes in which a burning fire consumed and catchy curves as well as those mischievous smiles, there was a kind of devil in it. And that's what attracted him. But there was something else . The power that emanated from each of his movements ...

"Lady Zelda, you are charming as always!" - He could not take his eyes off her beautiful face, approaching her while maintaining his gaze and kissing his sweet principal by simple politeness even if it was not the part he wanted to kiss.

"Stanislas Petrov! I am delighted to see you again despite the tense situation between you and my husband. The board of our company needs your presence because your help is precious to me. "

"I hope it is not just the Council that needs me." his sly smile revealed these true intentions. 

"What are you talking about? - I pretended not to understand the clues, I wanted to hear him say out loud his desire for me. The man realized that I wanted to have fun before tasting the passion fruit but he didn't realize that I approached him for the manipulator to my advantage. I understood everything I wanted at the moment, all my actions and my associates were heard and thought out. Only now, he didn't understand the emotions that wavered on my face but he soon discovered that meeting me tonight was not one of those best choices. He approached me with no regard for propriety and I with regard to my bottomless eyes. 

"Do you have any idea? Lady Zelda, it's no secret that you are alone but you are married to a man. But I understand that it is difficult for you to live alongside this animal. "Such a woman should not be alone. And together, we could achieve a lot. I will do anything to ..."

"In my opinion, you better not speak if you are going to come to life!" "-I could not allow this man to insult my husband because I may hate him, I like the goods they offer me. Dissatisfaction immediately broke out in my eyes, however Stanislas did not look away. 

"Don't refuse in advance. Who knows how fate is going to turn ... "- he smiled again and touched my hands with his lips. This prank was obvious, but I accepted the rules of the game and smiled back, nodding gracefully. Bowing, the Stanislas went away. Told me to look at it thoughtfully.

"So what does all this mean ..." - the voice came behind me and was so close to my ear that I could feel its breath on my bare neck. I started. And how does he manage to sneak around so quietly all the time without me realizing it? Ivan turned me around violently and started to burn me with a look. I had never known seen like that before even when he hit me, he remained calm, of marble as if he did not feel anything. There was ... jealousy in his eyes. A burning and irresistible jealousy, which convinced me that I would surely suffer.

"Why didn't you refuse it right away?" His breathing was strong, burning my face. "It's funny that you react like that ..." I don't want to upset him but my tongue was spitting venom without me directing it.

Ivan suddenly grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards our apartments.  
"What are you doing?! Price Let go, it hurts me! » I struggled vigorously, but he did not release his grip and tightened it more tightly. 

"I have to teach you a lesson," he practically threw me into the room, closing the door behind him and casting a spell of silence. I fell to the cold floor and looked up in defiance.  
"What lesson? What are you talking about? I don't want to be here with you, and ... ". But Ivan did not let me finish my sentence, covering my mouth with a brutal kiss and demanding that I return it but I did not return it.

"You are mine. And I want you to finally understand it ..." - He whispered furiously in my ear, breaking the kiss, and began to torment my neck with warm lips but his touch was unbearable. "You have always been indomitable. I’m your husband but you often forget that. You know that I love you more than anything else on this Earth and you still continue to betray me body and soul ... »

He had already reached my chest, burning under his breath. I was trembling with fear, but tried to defeat him. 

"Ivan ... Not now ... Please, no ..." I hit her chest, trying to free myself.

"You want it, do you want it the way I want you?" His hands gripped painfully my hips covered with my dress, it will leave bruises for sure. I flinched in pain, but he only strengthened his grip and threw me on the bed next to him. I was trying to get up, but he pressed me against the sheets and kissed me again, clasping his hands tightly.

Then he turned on my stomach without delicacy and began to caress my buttocks with confidence. When his hand touched the inside of my thigh, I regained my senses and tried again to stop the torture.

"Stop it ..." Ivan did not respond too focused on his task and continued what he had started. A groan of pain escaped from my lips. Without allowing me to regain my senses, Ivan suddenly entered me. Trying to drown the coarse movements with passionate caresses, he whispered in my ear:"You're only mine, you hear? Don't even dare think of others ..."

I breathed heavily between my tears, obeying him completely. I forced myself to dream of other things, it exploded with his seed in me ...

———————————————————————————————————————

Saint-Petersburg, Demeure Kamakarof, 1924

I was lounging in the winter garden where the flowers bloomed while mocking the autumn which yellowed the leaves of the trees and made the beauty of the last flowers wither wither. I sat down with difficulty on the meridian and is uttered a small moan which immediately warns my servant who rushed to my bedside. "Madam, you must not sit down without help!" The midwife can cause great pain, and we don't want the baby to come now." 

Janet was overflowing with joy since I knew I was pregnant with Ivan, she was so considerate and kind, but I don't want to be helped like a disabled person. "It's good, Janet! I'm fine and then if the baby arrives now I will be rid of the burden! Anyway, I'm at the end of the thirteenth month so it should not be late! " My words made the persistent smile of my servant decline but she said nothing and handed me a glass of water.

I know my words are harsh towards my baby but I can't bear to feel the growing child in me move, the feeling of kicking in my belly makes me cry. 

This child was born not out of love but out of fear and hate. I would love to love her but when I see my belly swollen with pregnancy, I think back to that evening when Ivan raped me. 

I was drinking my glass of water when a strong pain in my abdomen almost made me spit out the water. The pain disappeared quickly but then returned, I winced in pain and uttered small moans, my servant immediately understood what was happening. As she was about to speak, I lost my bones on the couch. We exchanged a concerned look and I started to panic. 

"Madam, don't worry! I'll go get the midwife and ... and tell other servants to help you get to the forest to give birth. Everything ... everything will be fine! " "I don't know why, but your tone of voice says the opposite!" And another contraction hit me harder this time.

———————————————————————————————————————

"Push Madame!" You're almost there! "I only wanted to strangle my midwife, she and her false positivity, but I have another important thing to manage. "AAHHHHH! " Atrocious cries were heard throughout the whole forest. "AHHH! Damn shit! " Insults flew without countenance between my teeth. I could hardly breathe between contractions. 

I grip Ivan's hands firmly as my back rests against his chest. 

It was customary for a witch to give birth in the middle of the forest and without a spell or potion to ease the pain, but there, my body was sore more than I could imagine. Pain like she had never felt before went through all its form. Anyone in the world has said that the natural birth process is a wonderful experience, is a bastard !

"Almost there, madam" in that odious sweet tone and still with a fucking forced smile, I wanted to tear her heart out!

"You are fine, Darling" I should never have accepted that Ivan came during childbirth, I also wanted to tear out his heart still beat. It shows that it was not they who gave birth to a ball of life of six pounds! 

"Oh ... shut up ... Iv! AHHHHHHHHH!" My words were again interrupted by another cry. The midwife smiled, "That's it. You're almost there. Give me another boost, and -"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! The baby's first cry rang out in the forest, reaching my ears as I finished the last push.I stopped screaming, allowing my body to slowly descend from the top I had reached. 

"How do you feel ?" Ivan's question was not important as my chest continued to lift and my body relaxed as much as possible against his body. My head tilted to the side and my green eyes scanned the surroundings to find the midwife cleaning the child in a basin of water placed on a tree stump.

I wanted to see him ... or here. I took a moment to find a calm breath. My forehead was pearling and my hair was shining with moisture formed by all the intensity of the effort.

"She looks beautiful like her mother!" She wrapped her in the pastel pink knit blanket that Janet once knitted.

The midwife gave it to me for the first time ....

While the midwife magically healed my birth wounds, I admired my little girl. Praise Satan, he blessed this midwife with healing abilities! I was already feeling much better now and could only focus on the infant.

The world around me slowed down, and Ivan and the midwife disappeared, and all that was left in my universe was my child and me. And I looked her in the eye and it was a total upheaval, all the anger or hatred I thought I felt against her collapsed. It was as if I had finally fallen in love for real, all the parts of my soul that had been broken by these last years were recollected to bring me back to life in a way. I felt like a whole person again, I had found my soul mate. I couldn't help but breathe in its smell, it captivated me like a drug but much stronger, It smelled of lavender from Provence. At first I thought I was hallucinating, but it smelled like fresh lavender for real. It was and will surely remain my favorite drug. I even came to wonder if I really liked Faustus because my feelings for my daughter were much stronger, and that for Faustus seemed lesser next door. It was such a special love, the kind that you only feel once in a lifetime

With my finger I traced her soft, pink and swollen cheeks. She squirmed slightly at my touch and let out a slight moan. 

That day, I no longer regretted the trials of rape, despite the fact that it was a terrible experience, but that had brought me the most beautiful gift. I fell madly in love with my dear little girl, Eléonore Spellman Kamakarof

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You don't really believe that Zelda wouldn't love her daughter.  
> And if not her thinking about her love for Faustus is a bit harsh but I wanted to show that she really loves her baby. Faustus will return in the next chapter so a confrontation is involved. 😊❤️


	9. Justice is an illusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zelda crosses an unexpected face during a city outing and everything that she has built collapses under her but that can be for the best....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thank frizz22 who allowed me to finish this chapter with the part she wrote for me. Go read his stories which are just wonderful and which make me write at the same time. The part frizz22 wrote is that of the meeting of Faustus and Zelda in town which is just perfect. Good reading 😊❤️

" It's impossible ! All these memories are obviously wrong! Aunt Zee never had a husband or child! She has never been abused by this man because he is not real like everything we see!" I paced the now dark room and looked up at Nick, Ambrose and Prudence to support my claims.

"Sabrina, these memories are very real !" "And how can you be sure?As we have said many times, Zelda's mind can play tricks on us!" Nick looked at me and seemed to take my idea into account.

"I can tell you one thing, coz. It’s that memories cannot be corrupted even by its owner when we are in its mind. " " You're welcome ! Aunt Zee is the most powerful witch that may have existed. She could modify them! You know better than me that she is vicious " "I forbid you to say horrors about our aunt! She loves you very much while you don't give her any respect!" "If the woman who slept with all these people, tortured them, killed them coldly is Aunt Zelda then she deserves what happened to her!" "How dare you!" Prudence had taken place between us, separating us before our words exceeded our thoughts.

"Stop arguing! Let's assume that her memories are true, so Sister Spellman has received the worst treatment that can be inflicted on a woman and that will not affect you more than that! Don’t you have a little decency and pretend pity for her!" Nick stepped out of the shadows to join the discussion he was away from.

"We have to move on! Whether you like it or not, we are stuck here with information that is beyond us, but we can do it!" We all calmed down; Nick was right, arguing won't solve anything. The following memory appeared just then.

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Saint Petersburg, Demeure Kamakarof, 1924

Tonight can be a qualifier without a problem, the baby has been asleep for a while and I am lying in my big white king, a steaming cup of tea in my hands and a book on my lap. Nothing would disturb the calm that reigns supreme this evening.

"Zelda! Open the door! I need to talk to you!" Nothing except Ivan and his whims. I had just locked the door immediately with my mind after hearing his voice at the door, I couldn't run the risk of throwing it in while he was mad at me. "Ivan, please you've been drinking all evening I don't want to talk to you like you are." I had abandoned my book and my cup of tea and placed them on the bedside table. "You are going to do what I tell you because you belong to me! Do it immediately! "

I got up slowly from the bed and went to the door to open it, but not without apprehension. Once the door was open, he furiously entered the room and sat on the bed, elbows on his knees and his face buried in his hands. I was still very uncomfortable and stayed by the door, ready to flee at the slightest sign of violence from him. For a while, we stayed in this stifling calm without moving until I ended up breaking the silence. "You wanted to speak to me so speak because I was planning to go to bed!" He looked up at me, I was wearing a mask of indifference to hide that I was frightened by his behavior.

"I have bad news, on informed me that interpolate was investigating our affairs!" That explains the feeling that I had for over a year, the feeling of being constantly watched. "And what do you plan to do about it?" It was not the first time that the police have investigated us and so far we have been coping with bribes and threats. But Interpol was a bigger network, better organized and with more agents. 

"I plan to leave for Moscow tomorrow morning to try to settle everything with contacts at Interpol. Everything will be back to normal and business will resume." "I trust you, don't take us both to jail ! I don't want to know that Eléonore would grow away from me and surely with my brother who will remind her of nothing every day! " "Come here!" In these moments, he can be more than gentle to my eyes when he takes me in these arms but is not Faustus. And nothing will change my feelings for him except my love for my daughter. "I would never risk your safety and jail is not an option! "

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Saint-Petersburg, City center, 1924

Faustus strolled aimlessly down the street, eyes passing over the shop windows without seeing their contents. He was only out and about because his meeting (or whatever reason he’s in Russia do) wasn’t for another hour and he refused to stay another minute in the stifling hotel room. Which meant, he was wandering through a strip of shops, mind not focusing on anything in particular. Until he caught a glimpse of red hair. Heart pounding, Faustus scolded himself for his traitorous body’s immediate response. He’d long ago given up hope that zelda would be one the many red-headed women he’d encountered in the past few years. Still, he couldn’t stifle the small spark of hope that it might be. So, despite himself, Faustus moved closer to the edge of the sidewalk to get a better look. It was then he noticed she’d dropped something. Hurrying forward, he snatched the small piece of cloth from the ground and touched the woman’s shoulder. “Excuse me, you dropped this.” The woman stiffened when he spoke and turned slowly, eyes wide. “Zelda!” He exclaimed, taken aback, a wide smile spreading across his face. “I never—“ it was then he noticed the infant in her arms. “Have you taken up nannying?” The question left him before he registered the resemblance, the small curl of red hair on the babe’s head and the ring on Zelda’s finger. “You’re, you’re married?” He asked, bringing his eyes back to Zelda’s and fear flickered across her face. “I, yes,” she breathed, shifting the child so she could hold it in one arm. “And I must be going, I’m to meet my husband and he can be rather cross when I’m late.” She snatched the cloth, likely a blanket for the child he thought now that he had context, from his hand, and took a quick step back. “You look well Faustus.” She gave him a small, sad smile before turning and all but running away. It took Faustus a moment to realize he was about to lose her again to spur him into motion after her. But she was gone. There wasn’t even a strand of red hair in sight; she must have turned a corner and teleported away. Faustus speared his hands through his hair in frustration, how could he have been so useless? The first time he’d seen her in years, since he’d been forced to flee Paris after the encounter at the club and he let her slip through his fingers. At least she looked better, healthier, no longer drowning herself in drugs and alcohol. It was a comfort, but something in her tone, her body language when she’d mentioned her husband made Faustus uneasy. Well, he’d just have to find her again. It was different this time, he didn’t have to run from the authorities, witching or mortal, because of the massacre at the club. No, he had time to track her down, to at least get her to talk to him. Plan in mind, Faustus made his way back to his hotel, glancing over his shoulder periodically as if hoping Zelda would reappear. 

Hand over her heart, Zelda tried to steady her breathing. Faustus Blackwood, here. Here in Russia and running into her on the street while she window shopped. What were the odds? As elated as she’d been to see him again, as painful as it was, Zelda knew she couldn’t speak to him; not at length. The last time Faustus had come into her life accidentally Ivan had gone on a killing spree. And that was before they’d even officially been together, she didn’t want to imagine what he would do now that they were married. Unconsciously, Zelda touched her side, where her bruised ribs hide beneath her dress. While Ivan hadn’t touched her while she was pregnant, he’d resumed his brutal punishments soon after Eléonore was born. Zelda didn’t want to risk his wrath, not when it was targeted at her more and more often these days no matter what she did. It could’ve been different. Her life. Had she run away with Faustus that day, so long ago, when he’d pleaded with her and then left his card. What would her life have been like? Yes, she had the power she wanted, but at what cost? Eléonore cooing in her arms, pulled Zelda out of her spiraling thoughts and she smiled tenderly at the girl. The price for not running when she had the chance been high; she’d paid for it physically, emotionally, spiritually. But.... But if she hadn’t taken this path, Zelda wouldn’t have Eléonore and though she regretted so much, she could never regret her child. Breathing deeply, Zelda made her way to meet Ivan once more—she hadn’t been lying to Faustus about going to see him—making sure she was at least calm on the outside. For if Ivan suspected she was rattled for any reason, he’d push, he’d probe, and Zelda didn’t want to be on the end of another one of his paranoid and jealousy interrogations. Especially when she knew what kind of violence the answers could provoke. Smoothing her dress and straightening her shoulders, Zelda pushed into the building and made for the room where she was to meet her husband.

———————————————————————————————————————

I returned to the meeting room where Ivan was to meet me but he was obviously late; it didn't matter, I'll wait for it. I sat on one of the chairs around the large meeting table. I was cooing with Eleanor on my knees when the sound of the door alerted me to the presence of someone in the room but this was not my husband because I could feel different energies emanating from the person; a mortal! 

I looked up to see in front of me, a blonde haired woman was staring at me as if she was afraid that I would disappear. "Can I know who you are and why you are here without my having invited you!" The woman seemed unaffected by my words and sat down next to me. She smiles briefly at the baby and then focuses her attention on me.

"Hello, Mrs. Kamakarof. I'm Cecile, an Interpol agent, and I'm here to inform you that your husband is currently in prison. I would like you all to tell me what you know about your husband's affairs so that we can bring him to justice. Do you understand the important role you play in this matter? 

I looked him straight in the eye without an ounce of fear and replied coldly. "I'm not so stupid that I don't understand what you are saying! And I will not tell you anything without my confirmation with my own eyes that my husband is in prison so arranged for you to have a glimpse with him and then we will talk! Eleanor started crying at a specific time forcing me to interrupt the discussion to focus on calming her down. "Hush! All is well, my little demon! Mother is there ! She went back to sleep in my arms and I resumed eye contact with the woman whose name must be Cecile .... I think. 

"So lead me to him!" "

———————————————————————————————————————

Saint-Petersburg, Prison, 1924

I had managed to get a glimpse of Ivan without the police everywhere. I had left Eleanor with her nanny, I didn't want to take her to such a horrible place.

I was now sitting at a table which was split in two by a glass with two telephone handsets hanging on the small walls around the glass so that we could speak it without being afraid of being heard but anyway the room was empty. And there it happened, emerging from what was the prison. He had already made her wear the famous orange clothes. He sat in front of me and picked up the handset, I did the same.

"I'm sorry to get caught, my love. I regret it so much, you can't even imagine. " I gave her a sad little smile. "I imagine too well." "I wanted to tell you, Zelda that I will take the trouble they will inflict on us for our crimes if you do a few things for me." "And lo and behold, even at the lowest he can't help but control me constantly. " What do you want ?" He smiles at my statement. "I want you to say the three words you never wanted to say to me! And I would endure all her suffering without arguing!" "Good, if that's what you want. I lo-lov.... I hate you from the bottom of my being, Ivan! Will die in heaven ! I never want to see you again! Is that what you wanted to hear me say? Because it feels good to say it out loud!" He was burning with anger but I didn't care, he wouldn’t abuse me in the future.

"Tell me you're not the ugly snake that I thought you are now! I smile slyly." "No of course not ! I'm a thousand times worse, motherfucker! I hope you will enjoy your life in prison because it is a small gift from me to make you understand that I lived daily with you but it will not be worse as far as I have lived !" "What don't you mean" it's a small gift from me "Zelda, what have you done yet !" I couldn't control the satisfied smile that spread over my face.

"I may have called Interpol to inform them of your illegal activities anonymously, forcing them to carry out one of their investigations, but I never thought they would take as long to put in prison, so I had to inform them of your trip to Moscow and miraculously, they finally put you in prison. " "You realize that if I fall, you fall with me. The police will never leave you free after everyone you have killed !" He was laughing, imagining I was disappointed that my plan backfired on me but he really took me for an idiot if he believed that I had not planned everything. "I think it's time for our paths to separate once and for all. Goodbye, Ivan. And I hung up the receiver, he signaled me brutally so that I could pick up the receiver, but I had already gotten up and headed for the exit door.

"Zelda! I will find you and kill you with my own hands, I remind you that I still have my powers!" I turned around proud that he finally said those words so I could reveal one last gift to him. "By the way, I may have made a deal with the devil, a few hours ago to suck up all your powers and give them to me. Good news, Ivan. You are officially a mortal but you are still immortal, I failed to take this from you. "

———————————————————————————————————————

Saint-Petersburg, Demeure Kamakarof, 1924

I now had to flee as far from Europe as possible and only reappear in several tenths of a year later. The options of where to reside were jostling in my mind and there the solution came to me; The destruction plan! This process is the maneuver to follow if we are discovered by the police or any other authority wishing us harm.

"Lucia, packed my things and my daughter's in the bottomless suitcase! And Janet, launched the destruction plan and brought me the envelope of the safe !" They hurried to fulfill my orders and I continued to cradle Eleanor in my arms while I looked out the window, the park that had never been as beautiful as this summer. "I'm sorry, Eleonore for doing all of this, but it's for our safety. You will understand later if you see your father again, which I have no hope of." I kissed her forehead and my eyes were already starting to fill with tears at the thought of finishing the process turning my stomach upside down. No one except the bodyguards, Ivan and I don't know the protocol and it was for the best.

“Madam, everything is ready and all the employees without exception are gathered in the hall. I also found the envelope as you told me. Hold !" I took the envelope and read it briefly without paying much attention to the empty phrase of interest. "Thank you, Janet. I go down in a few seconds, go ahead." I took the suitcase, put the envelope in my dress pocket and went down with the baby still in my arms.

When I arrived in the entrance hall, the twenty or so servants were on line with a bodyguard behind each of them. "I am sorry that our partnership must end like this, but I must not leave any traces behind me!" The servants looked at each other, not understanding where I was coming from and before they could understand, each of them was shot in the head by the bodyguards who later got off. Bodies littered the marble floor which had turned red due to the numerous pools of scarlet blood.

I know that by eliminating them all, I killed honorable people who had done nothing except serve us faithfully but they held information against me and I will never allow anyone to be locked up again. And everything I do is necessary. I teleported to the place where I was told to take refuge in the letter ....

———————————————————————————————————————

Saint-Petersburg, Prison, 1924

"Your wife has disappeared with your daughter, Mr. Kamakarof. Do you have any idea where she could have taken refuge?" An Interpol agent had started questioning Ivan about Zelda's mysterious flight with Eleanor. He had found the empty house, the bodies still in the same position and no sign of life. "You say that the servants and the bodyguards all died from a bullet to the head." " Exactly, why? Does that remind you of a few things? "She put in place the destruction plan. You will be unable to find it. She is gone forever." The agent seemed confused, for him no one could ever vanish, especially a single woman with one more baby. "Why don't we find it? I suppose that in this plan, there must be a place where she can take refuge. And you must know it !" Ivan laughed, putting the man in front of him even more uncomfortable.

"Yes, there is a place where she can take refuge but there is a change in each self and we do not know where he is unless we read the envelope. This place can be everywhere in the world as not far from here but you cannot make the link between us and this place because this place was bought by a company which is managed by another company and its can go up endlessly like that. Didn't take us for beginners, the only reason I'm in prison is because this bitch reported me! " "But we can tell you that we find her, Mr. Kamakarof" "If you say so but I will find her before and cut her throat! "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a hard chapter to write so it's a bit of a mess, but I can't do any better 😊❤️


	10. Drink of the Gods or Drink of the Devil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Despite a fresh start, problems and bad habits die hard. Life is cruel with Zelda as always.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know my new chapter is quite long but I was super inspired so here is the novel 😭 Good reading ! ❤️

Time flies at a frightening speed, leaving behind only the remains of a life now broken. I can’t say that life don’t give gifts to make my life simpler but endowing me with talents that nobody considers interesting.

I was born at a time when women are only considered as beautiful accessories to enhance their husbands. I was born with such beauty that it eclipsed my intelligence, men and most people see in me only an object of desire, almost forgetting that I am still a being endowed with intelligence and feeling. I am tired of constantly having to depend on someone less intellectual than I am, I am tired of being only a pawn in the game of others where my desires are not taken into account, I am tired of make me step on it because I'm a woman.

There are two options open to me in this life to secure my future, either I become the wife of a wealthy businessman who would support me and my daughter or find the way to prostitution where this time my body would be sold to the highest bidder. To these two options, I say that I chose neither. I can stop being a pawn in the game of others and turn every person who can be useful into pawns on the big chessboard that is becoming my life, people think that I am stupid because I am a woman and that I am beautiful, so they will not see me manipulating them as I please. I became the monster that my family and Ivan saw sleeping in me, I became a bitch who lives only for their own interests and nothing else.

———————————————————————————————————————

Zelda's apartment, New Orleans, 1927

For the past two hours, I’ve been trying to teach the little redhead and brown eyes that sat on my lap how to play the piano. Eleonore hesitated by touching the keys of the piano, anxious to do well as I am shown to her. She sticks her tongue out to the side and frowns, her grimace is just adorable, forcing me to lift my lips in a smile. It had started well by touching the right notes and then the piano made an unpleasant sound, a sign that it was the wrong key. Eleanor crossed her arms in front of her chest and began to sulk, she was obviously disappointed not to be successful.

"Mom, I can't do it ! I don't like the piano ! " I hugged him and hugged her before I explained a few things to her. "You know, you can't do everything right the first time.You have to work hard to do what you want. Ok, my little devil ?" Her smile returned lit up her face at the mention of her nickname. 

"Okay but mom, I don't want you to go to work! I want to spend the evening with you and that it is you who goes to bed and not this stupid deadly nanny ! " She made an angry face at the mere mention of her nanny whom I had hired to babysit her when I worked late at night. 

She was staring at me now with her big brown doe eyes, her eyes are the only thing she inherited from her father. I would love to tell her that I will stay but it is already 7:30 p.m. and I have to go to work. I take a strand of red hair and brush it behind her ear like Faustus did with me, I look at her and give her a sad smile and sorry eyes. "I have to go, but you know that if I don't go, we won't be able to live in this big apartment or buy new clothes and toys, and we won't be able to buy food any more. But I’ll see you tomorrow morning and we’ll spend the day together as usual, I’ll teach you a new spell, and we’ll improve your piano skills." "If you say so ... and we will make strawberry pancakes? It’s one of the only things you don’t burn or isn’t edible ! " 

She laughed at my poor cooking skills. And I laughed with her thinking about all the dishes that I burned or completely missed, luckily, little dinners and cooking spells exist otherwise we would have been starved for a long time.

"Asked so kindly, I agree to make you strawberry pancakes but now I have to leave you, my little devil. Danniella! Come take care of her !" I kiss her little head and lower her from my knees. The nanny arrives quickly and takes her to the playroom, leaving me alone in the living room. I will have to leave now or I will never leave.

———————————————————————————————————————

New Orleans, 1927, 10:30 p.m.

That night, in one of New Orleans' most famous nightclubs, where jazz reigned supreme every night. I sang alone on stage and entertained the audience with covers of current songs.

While I was in my dressing room, fixing my makeup and dressing in a breathtaking outfit since I am paid to capture the attention of customers. I sat in front of the dressing table, applying blood-red lipstick to my fleshy lips which contrasted with the dark blue dress which pulled towards black, with a plunging neckline and long satin sleeves, brandishing her brittle and milky arms because that her hem was vaguely transparent, exposing part of my legs, wearing elegant black stilettos.

I was on my own, luckily. I had all the freedom to focus on myself without worrying about those around me.

"Honey, are you okay? I can feel your nervousness from here." A blonde came out of the doorway to stand next to me and put a hand on my shoulder reassuringly. Her name was Grace, one of the bar waitresses and witches with whom I had become close. I had a hard time trusting anyone for a long time, but Grace was one of her people who saw beyond appearances and prejudices.

"A little. But as usual, everything will go as planned," I admitted, pinching my lips shortly after applying my lipstick, making them appear completely.

"Everything will be fine, Phiona! I know you well enough to tell you that people will throw themselves at your feet when you appear on the scene." I couldn't help but say that the name Phiona hurt me when it was spoken. I felt like a stab when someone called me like that as if I had killed a part of me, to tell the truth I had made disappear all trace of the existence of Zelda, she was wanted by most agencies but they only had my wife name: Zelda Kamakarof. So I took my middle name and maiden name.

When I had finished putting on makeup and putting on my jewelry, we then left the locker room when I only wanted to smoke one more cigarette before the show finally started.

"By Belzubute! I need a cigarette as soon as possible before the show." I started screaming, wiping my sweaty forehead with the back of my manicured hand.

"A cigarette sounds perfectly!" Grace said as soon as we got our packets of cigarettes and our lighters, towards the balcony of the club. When we were on the balcony, we lit our cigarettes and started to take them out, blowing a dull heaviness, escaping from their lips. I started to contemplate the night sky, the sky was clear and you could see some constellations that I had learned in the past alongside Faustus, while I looked at the celestial vault, I felt that the eyes of Grace scrutinized me .

"I can't believe the man from the last time is not seen that I was handling him for his money. What an idiot he is! We have to find a new pigeon or we will collapse in debt! I have even more need the money since this stupid boss lowered my salary. "I get angry more and more against my boss, who does not understand that I am a single woman with a young child. I will tighten my grip on the balcony railing, the knuckles of my hands turn white.

"I know! I will find you a new cash cow as soon as possible and you can take all his money from him. If not, let's change the subject, how are you going to make your show tonight even more interesting? Everyone knows that you you don't need anything more to get attention, but you said you had a surprise, so what? "

"With alcohol! Of course!" I underlined the word alcohol, trying to test my best friend's patience with sarcasm. Meanwhile, a vicious and mischievous smile adorned my scarlet red lips, taking a whiff of my long cigarette. "No, no, no! I can't find you dead drunk in the arms of a stranger." I could not help laughing at the sight of her reaction, she reacts as I expected.

"I was just kidding. Obviously, I'm not going to bother you tonight, I promise you!"

"Sometimes your jokes seem pretty serious and it really scares me." She started to scrutinize my face, and to notice my mischievous smile, imprinted on my face because even if I had sworn, that did not mean that I would not make a small deviation. "I can see on your face how serious you are." "Especially when it comes to my work. I want to bring a little humor." Instead of answering simply at my wording, she raised an eyebrow and continued smoking in silence until we finished our cigarettes and smashed them on the floor with our heels.

———————————————————————————————————————

"Welcome to Hathaway."

Descends a small black stone staircase to a large ground floor where is placed a huge solid wood bar, behind him three bartenders in a hurry to place the many orders, the room is full, full of faces happy to have a good time with friends or with his partner or faces adorned with pure sadness drowned in alcohol to forget. There were about forty tables, almost all occupied. A group of musicians tuned their instruments on the stage, poorly lit by the projectors. The smoke from cigarettes rolled in the dark and formed a fog. I went to the back of the bar near the dance floor, which was still unoccupied. A bartender was quick to spot me. "What will it be, sir?" "Do you have cognac with ice cubes?" The bartender nodded and replied in a neutral tone, "Sure, I'll bring it to you right away."

The tables that we started to fill more and more until they were all occupied. People stood against the walls when they couldn't sit. An iced cognac appeared in front of me, I took a sip before the ice cubes dissipated. "Need anything else, sir?"

"No it is going to be fine." I nodded and the bartender went to his business. There was the sound of an instrument coming from the group, I immediately understood that their performance was going to start and a crowd rushed to the tables and applauded the arrival of a figure who was still unknown to me . Encouragements were made to wait again and with them the spotlights came on to give a subdued atmosphere. Each face of the play turned to the stage like butterflies attracted by the light. I could not see the reason for so much attraction and for good reason, a sea of heads rose between me and the scene. But I could still hear and no one could do without it.

The sound of a piano sounds calmly, a few simple notes to begin with, then the slight crackling of the cellist followed shortly after, an almost flat and oozing trombone played. And a sensual and smoky voice like that of a demon of lust emerged in this perfect harmony.

It's a world of men

It's a world of men

But it would be nothing

Nothing without a woman or a girl

What if I wanted to kiss her when I saw her through the crowd, if my mouth suddenly salivated for more than one glass of alcohol, if my fingers grabbed the glass a little too tightly wishing to grab a swaying hip about music, so I thought I wasn't the only one with this sweet fantasy. Every man in these four walls was synchronized at that time, his eyes only staring at the woman as if it were the last thing in the world that could save them from darkness. A light in the night.

You see the man made the cars

To take us on the road

Man made the train

To carry the heavy load

I could sense that she was one of the most divine creatures in this world. Only because my mind recognized her as she was, the few glimpses I had of her through the crowd. His red hair was now shining, like bewitching flames, sliding around his shoulders. Her beautiful feminine curves molded in a most scandalous dark blue dress which kept her so tight that I wondered how she could still breathe.

Artificial electric lamp

To get us out of the dark

Man made the boat for water

As Noah made the ark

It reminded me of the story of Ulysses, Siren Circe and his song. How she killed tired and reckless sailors. This woman could do it by simply swinging her hips sensuellemnt, he imagined, she could kill anyone with a chorus or a look. As the smoke swirled around her like poisonous snakes resting on their master's shoulder, I studied his face more closely. Her plump red lips. Emerald green eyes. His creamy alabaster skin. Yes, it was her without a doubt. But not what I expected, it was an embodied sin, a forbidden fruitiness.

It's a world of men

It's a world of men

But it would be nothing

Nothing without a woman or a girl

Man thinks of some baby girls

And a little boy

Man makes them happy

Because man makes toys

His fingers went up the length of the microphone handle, caressed the silver and gripped when his voice so deep and bewitching. She felt the song, she lived it. I felt it too, I felt the caresses of his fingers against the microphone as if it were me who was in his place, her in my arms. And when her eyes suddenly opened, they met hers, I could see that she was staring at him while singing.

And after the man does all he can

Even if the man makes money

To buy from another man

Cliches. Through crowded bars, their eyes suddenly met, love at first sight like in the bad Hollywood movies, fate got involved or it was just an illusion. Clichés only exist in movies and dreams. In truth, she seemed not to me notice, even if a sly smile spread over her face, a shy flirt nothing more. She played for me , it seemed to me, yet I did not know her. I felt something cold in his chest that was not brandy but more ice cubes, such as his heart which cools down at the finding.

It's a man's world

It's a man's world

But it would be nothing

Nothing without a woman or a girl

I kept his eyes riveting in her direction for as long as I could without it breaking eye contact. And her eyes drifted away from me, through the dancing couples in symbiosis with the music, the tables crowded with faces, attracting the gaze of other men when she moved. I was just one of them, one of his many men fantasizing about her, a creature from heaven or hell.

The lights dimmed on the stage, leaving it almost in the dark as the song's rhythm slowly faded. She became a silhouette that stood out only very little from the darkness, her hands sliding over her hips until they grabbed the satin and then went up on her exposed chest to her nape where she swept her curls redheads on the side. Eyes closed she caught her breath under the raging applause and hiss that swallowed her and I swallowed my pride, while keeping my gaze on her.

The drums increased the fast and furious tempo, the strings of the instruments were strummed sharply. And his body became completely visible to me again as the crowd parted, dancing to make room for him. I so much wanted her to stay on stage like a goddess on the Olympus, watching us from above.

They tried to get me into rehab but I said no no no

Yes i was black but when i come back you will know know know

I don't have time and if my dad thinks I'm fine

He tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go

Her legs alone were to be embodied by pure, long, shapely and creamy sin. She continued to run her ringed fingers provocatively over her body.  


I prefer to be at home with Ray

I don't have seventy days

Because there is nothing

There is nothing you can teach me

What I cannot learn from Mr. Hathaway

At first I thought she was pointing at me, of course I was wrong. He was the bartender right behind me, the nice bald bartender. The owner? Hathaway, right? He winked at me and left another glass of brandy in front of me. I did not know that the first was empty because I was captivated by it, nothing matters for the moment.

I didn't have much in class

But I know it doesn't come in a shot glass

When I went back on stage, she was no longer on her headland, she was gone, the microphone leaving only her ghostly aura behind her. I followed her voice at the source and saw her among the full tables, snatching the raised glasses from their owners and drinking them without taking the time to savor them, receiving spankings on her firm ass by the greedy hands of some men. She was impressive, lowering the alcoholic libation in the mouth between words. I frowned to see impatient hands sometimes taking hers, or worse, cupping her hips as she moved.

Yes i was black but when i come back you will know know know

I don't have time and if my father thinks I'm fine

He tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go

Despite this, she didn't seem embarrassed by their hands and their contacts, in fact, she seemed to appreciate all the attention. Sitting on a few knees, kissing a few foreheads or even lips, swirling under a few arms. She absorbed their heat and redirected it, letting it nourish its coveted curves. She worked them, leaning suggestively to let them fit the banknotes into the low-cut neckline of this dress or under a deliberately exposed garter. I felt predictable jealousy next to something unpredictable: worry, for her safety.

He said "I just think you're depressed"

This me "Yeah, baby, and the rest"

Any of these obscene beasts could hurt him in the most moderate way: what if there was drugs in these drinks? What if one of them simply carried a knife in the throat, broke his neck like that of a swan? Who would protect her? I started looking for some sort of bodyguard or bouncer.

Yes I was black but when I come back you will know how to know ..

I signaled the bartender to be reserved and he immediately jumped at the chance to make money. "How are you sir?"

"I'm fine. Does she sing here every night?"

"Phiona?" The bartender shrugged, surely amused by the fact that he had been asked the question millions of times. "Yes. Except Sunday. It's a real pleasure for the crowd." "Well, I see that."

I never want to drink again

I just, ohh I just need a friend

I will not spend ten weeks

Let everyone think I'm better

It's not only my pride

It's just until those tears have dried

I stopped looking at Phiona. It hurt a little to see her so objectified, so discouraged that she would let herself be looked at by their eyes, raped by their incessant hands. I was wondering if she considered them lovers and the brandy went up my throat.  


They tried to get me into rehab but I said no no no

Yes i was black but when i come back you will know know know

I don't have time and if my dad thinks I'm fine

He tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go

The music stopped and the club darkened again. I realized that yes, the second cognac had indeed disappeared as quickly as it had appeared once more already. I searched my mind out of the incessant buzz of alcohol, but I didn't immediately recognize it, it was a bad sign for me. I still started to sip the third however a voice in my head told me that I was making a big mistake. I found it very unlikely that I would even be able to see her, let alone speak to her.

I never know how much i love you

I never know how much I care

When you put your arms around me

I have a fever so hard to bear

You give me a fever when you kiss me

Fever when you hold me tight

Morning fever

Fever all night

She sang again, she sang a sticky and stuffy song almost at the same time the walls tightened around me. I no longer looked at her but my body wanted to turn away from the bar and see her sweet face again, I would end up drinking and leave this infernal place as quickly as possible. Maybe it wasn't supposed to be. Maybe she was so far into this void that I couldn't reach.

The sun lights up during the day

The moon lights up at night

I turn on when you call my name

And you know that I will treat you properly

You give me a fever when you kiss me

Fever when you hold me tight

Morning fever

Fever all night

I felt my hat lifted from my head and I turned to the culprit, it was her "Phiona!" But she didn't hear it. Still singing, she tilted her hat over her own head, the cat's eyes narrowing as she slid against me. "Uh ..." The words failed against my ear. Her dress slid against her knee and I could feel the softness of her curves below. "Hmm."

Everyone has a fever

It's something you all know

Fever is not a new thing

The fever started a long time ago

She grabbed my chin with her finger still raised and looked me in the eyes with a sly smile then released her grip on my chin, slowly turned under my arm until she was sitting on my legs. The brim of my hat casts a shadow on her pretty cheek. I wanted so much to trace the angle of darkness with the light on her red and fleshy lips ... but her moved so quickly, so gently, wrapping the hand devoid of my glass of cognac on my shoulder until 'she kisses me chastely on the lips.

Romeo loved Juliet

Juliette, she felt the same

When he put his arms around her, he said

Juliette Baby, you are my flame

You give fever

When we kiss

She turned to face me, still no sign of shame on her flirting face. She ran her warm hands inside her thighs from the groin to the knee, plunging, undulating as if her life depended on it. "Phiona" I began to whisper against her ear, still unheard of and she left just as quickly and drank my glass while she walked. "Uh ..." She was still wearing my hat but I didn't really care about it yet.

Fever with your fiery youth

Fever, I'm on fire

Fever, yeah i burn, forsooth

Darkened again by the darkness on stage, she breathed into the microphone. "Hot here, ladies and gentlemen. Let's take a break, huh? Let Mr. Hathaway wet those mouths and ... whatever needs to be wet tonight."

She left the scene without turning around, leaving a crowd agitated by her sudden disappearance like drug addicts demanding a dose. Another bar race. I lost sight of her again in the crowd and couldn't find her. I went back to the restless bar and frustrated that I hadn't told him anything and that I was disturbed by his contact, whereas if I am here it is because I have a contract to honor. My heart was beating faster in my chest than ever before and my cheeks were burning with fiery fire that consumed me from the inside. This Phiona was most certainly a temptress in her element as if she had made her whole life but maybe it was true. Was it Phiona? Before Zelda? I knew she had a past, but I never imagined ... that. Although that would explain the notes in the file on his alcoholism and drug addiction, I suppose. And the problems with men, especially sex. I closed my eyes tightly, remembering the memories of his touch.

The feelings of loss resurfaced when the bartender slipped another glass in front of him, I had no energy or scruples to refuse, I felt the oppressive spirit of all the surrounding faces drowning in the bitterness that flow from his loss. She had bewitched me like everyone else in this room.

———————————————————————————————————————

I took refuge in my dressing room, behind the protective walls, keeping me safe from outside interference. I was frozen in place, not moving a muscle, my arms crossed against my chest giving me a semblance of protection. When the sound of the heels let me know the presence of someone very familiar, I looked up at her, she looked at me sadly and I could feel the reproaches pouring in as soon as I saw her.

"I promised you that I won't be drunk tonight and I keep my promises constantly." I laughed, even I was not convinced that of what i was advancing. She laughed with me and joined me on the couch. "I am at least proud of you because you are drunk but still aware of your actions. You are a good girl ! " She pinched my affectionate cheek as if I were just a child. " Thanks Mom. What is the next step ? Are you breastfeeding me? No but I ask ! " She started laughing again loudly. "It's when you want, I don't mind sleeping with you! " We smirked at his statement slyly but I had to tell him about something urgent that couldn't wait any longer.

"Let's talk seriously for two minutes, just now in the room, I felt an evil energy, a harmful presence." She quickly regained seriousness and frowned in complete incomprehension. "But you were too drunk to know who it came from, I guess!" "You suppose good , but if this presence is real, then we have a problem that requires our full attention. Something terrible will happening , the darkness leaves hell to come to reign on Earth, I can feel it from here. A storm is approaching and we have to be careful, you hear me. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote a new story, "For The love of power" so go read the first chapter and leave a Kudos if you like this new story and also leave kudos and comment on it 😊❤️


	11. Woman is either an angel or a devil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our own actions can lead to our death without even knowing it. The bar man turns around Zelda a little too close to everyone's taste and displeases more than one but for different reasons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me a while to get the chapter out today, not because I was having trouble writing or was lazy but earlier because I started to re-watch CAOS. ..😂 Good reading 😊❤️

New Orleans, Hathaway Bar, 1927

I was still established at the bar, the amber liquor burned my throat with each sip, but this feeling was no worse than having failed in my mission. The reason I came to this place, the reason I watched it. Thoughts like these multiplied and invaded my body to isolate me from all interactions outside my mind, plunging me into the darkness of those around me.

And then my hat was put back on my head without my realizing it, fine manicured fingers tracing abstract signs on my neck.

"I'm giving you your hat back." She was next to me, a few inches from my face, nothing stopped her from kissing me now. I studied her from head to toe, burning with an inconceivable desire for every part of her body. "Get out. Now," she moaned, pointing to the man who was sitting on the bar stool next to him, he quickly fled, leaving room for her. Her body but more precisely her hips swayed sensually and she sat gracefully on the seat, a charming smile adorning her bloody lips. I tried not to look at the leg and thigh strip revealed by the split dress, but I failed miserably, I could not resist the temptation that my eyes drift towards the forbidden place. When she realized my transgression, she raised my chin to meet my eyes, an amused glow dancing inside and they were as emerald green as the photo in the folder, even more beautiful and green still. "And I also have to thank you for the glass of cognac."

"Miss." I speak in a hoarse but soft voice, instantly, I begin to look for signs of the heartless monster that I had been portrayed. But of him there was no trace where he was hidden in the depths of his being.

She laughs, gently and sexy. Giving me a charming smile. "Miss? That's what we call respectable women." She took out a cigarette case from one of the pockets of her dress, seeing her cigarette in her mouth, I took out my lighter to light it with her cigarette. "I'm not." She crossed her legs more gently, lifting more of her thighs at the same time. One of his legs struck hers suggestively and rubbed the fabric of my pants, sending me little chills. "Just call me Phiona."

"Phiona," he repeated. "Do you remember a certain Jack Anderson?"

She tilted her head, chased her smoke from her face. "Hmmm. I'm afraid not," She leaned over to me, exposing her cleavage more to my view. "But I hope we had a good time together."

My face was burning with anger, because this bitch could not remember him after having had a relationship for more than a year. "Phiona, he committed suicide after you broke up. Two months ago now."

"Are you from the police?" His face was distorted by surprise and even fear that invaded him. "Well, I'm sorry, sir." She started to slide from the stool to get away from me and run away from the conversation. The subject seemed sensitive to these eyes: "I don't remember him. And I have nothing to do with this man, I never met him. I'm just going to leave-"

"No!" I grabbed her forearm forcefully, silencing her and staying still. "No. I'm not from the police ... well, I'm not in the military anymore. I'm not - not even in the FBI." I had to do it right the first time or everything would fall apart, nothing is more important to me right now than this mission.

"Why are you here? What did you want from me? I don't even know your name." My grip on his arm is softened but can't relax, pulling him slightly towards me. "Phiona, do you need something?" Hathaway had appeared before us, ready to call security to get me out of the bar at any time.

"Don't worry about me, I'm fine." She slipped a bundle of folded notes from her cleavage to the owner of the large bar. The advice she had received so far. "That's all I've had so far, I'll give you the rest at the end of the evening."

"Thanks, Phiona. Just a few more nights like this and can have a week off."

"It will be a truly blessed day for me." She smiled happily at him then turned to my direction, giving me his full attention. In between, I had withdrawn my hand from Phiona's forearm or rather from Zelda. "Phiona ... I need to talk to you."

She looked at me with curiosity, not seeing what I wanted to talk about when we had just met. She grabbed her face in her hands and I watched her play with her long red curls. "What's going on, honey?"

"I came here to find you. I needed to find you."

"Good." She spread her elbows on the bar behind her, pushing a pair of rather than glorious breasts forward. "I'm here so tell me everything."

"Where can we speak privately?"

"In private?" His forehead wrinkled again in confusion. She looked at me from top to bottom, thinking about the possibility. An ironic and conscious smile adorned his face. It wasn't exactly a pleasant smile. "What if you took me to dinner after the show, huh? I haven't had food for hours. And then maybe we'll see to ... talk. In private."

"Good," She obviously knew where to find food at such a late hour of the night. "Will be happy to take you to dinner."

The particular aspect remained. "Nice to meet you too. What is your name already?" She got down from her seat. "My name is Mason Miller. "I still have to sing this evening. Wait for me here? See you after the show?" "I'll wait then."

"Yes, I'm afraid of it." She looked over her shoulder. "I PARIS that you are going to wait for." I tried to ignore the excitement in his shoulders. Admittedly, she hadn't remembered Jack or had denied any connection with him. But now it's all just a matter of time. I watched her again when she got on the stage. This time it was a slow melody.

So I know that a woman has a soul

Worth all the silver and gold

And then I'm richer than the richest gold

If the woman has a soul

If the woman has a soul

If the woman is drunk

If the woman has a soul

Or maybe there was a deeper connection between our two souls. The thing the Lord had talked about briefly. what was that? What could it be?

Now I'm just a regular

I don't need much

I don't need a Cadillac car

Or diamonds and the like

But the woman I hold

She must have a soul

And then I'm richer than the richest gold

If the woman has a soul

I supposed, lips pursed in thought, if I couldn't make her see regret .... Save her from harm. For the sake of this woman.

Well i don't need a woman

It has a lot of class

Because class in a woman

I don't mean it will last

I need some kind of woman

When I hold it, it fits well, yeah

Oh, and when she throws it at me

I give in without fighting

I wondered and my mind wandered away from reality. Would Phiona be worthy of repentance? Was this woman capable of love, of adoration for our Lord Gods? Why are we here if not to save the souls of the living? She was going to give me what I asked for.

So I know that a woman has a soul

Worth all the silver and gold

And then I'm richer than the richest gold

If the woman has a soul

If the woman has a soul

If the woman is drunk

If the woman has a soul

The music dissipated in the room, it bowed weakly. The crowd loved him, this could not be questioned. And when she came out of the scene, they waited for her return like the previous time, like drug addicts in need. Whistling, clapping and clapping their feet until she returned a few moments later. "One last song," she whispered into the microphone. "Since you've all been so nice to me tonight. And it's late, so I'm going to sing you to sleep on this one ... if any of you sleep tonight."

I remember you

You are the one who made my dreams come true

There are a few kisses

I remember you

You said "I love you too"

Yes i don't know?

The couples danced slowly this time. Heads on the shoulders. Her voice was softer, maybe tired. Her eyes are softer, maybe tired too. And they met mine, boldly this time, no doubt.

I also remember a distant bell and fallen stars

Like the rain of blue-ooh-ooh-ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo

When my life is over

And the angels ask me to remember

The pleasure of everything

So I'll tell them I remember you-ooh

So ... was there a chance for her? It seemed more authentic now, softer. There had been no charming impact on her body, her expression. Just a song, I imagined. Any song to end the evening agitated by so much lust.

I also remember a distant bell and fallen stars

Just like the rain of blue-ooh-ooh-ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo

When my life is over

And the angels ask me to remember

The pleasure of everything

Then I'll tell them I remember, tell them I remember

Tell them I remember you

If she really didn't remember ... they could be different.

Phiona left with a deep bow. The group continued to play and I had no doubt that this bar would certainly be open all night long. Heading out of the crowd still on the dance floor, she handed a new bundle of tickets to the bartender and then turned to me. "Is it still good for dinner, Mason?" The twinkle in her eyes told me that she was delighted to have dinner with me.

"Yes." I got up from the seat, strangely not wavering the cognac I had drunk. "I'm starving, don't you?" "A burger and a milkshake, does that sound to you? All that is open at the moment is Popie's."

"A burger? I asked, amazed to know that she was eating something so popular when it was apparently raised in high society.

"What could be better than a fatty dish after a good dose of alcohol?" She took my hat and put it on her head, all smiles. "Come on. We have to sneak out of here before we get docked."

"Docked?"

She pulled me through the crowd. "Do you think you're the only man who wants to take me away tonight?"

"I came here to find you. I needed to find you."

"Good." She stretched her elbows on the bar behind her, pushing a pair of rather than glorious breasts forward. "I'm here so tell me everything."

"Where can we speak privately?"

"In private?" His forehead wrinkled again in confusion. She looks at me from top to bottom, thinking about the possibility. An ironic smile and a conscience adorned his face. It wasn't exactly a pleasant smile. "What if you took me to dinner after the show, huh? I haven't eaten for hours. And then maybe we'll see ... talk. In private."

"Good," she obviously knew where to find food at such a late hour of the night. "I'll be happy to take you to dinner."

The particular aspect remained. "Nice to meet you too. What's your name already?" She got up from her seat. "My name is Mason Miller." I still have to sing tonight. Are you coming here for me? See you after the show? "" I will wait then. "

"Yes, I'm afraid of it." She looked over her shoulder. "I PARIS that you are going to wait." I tried to ignore the excitement in his shoulders. True, she hadn't remembered Jack or denied any connection to him. But now everything is only a matter of time. I saw him again when I arrived on stage. This time it was a slow melody.

She may not be the best woman

I never saw

Neither the charms of the ladies

High society

But the woman with a soul

Worth all the silver and gold

And all the love I have belongs

To the woman with soul

Was this woman's soul recoverable? Will she be able to put the devil aside to pray to the one and true God who could exist? Could I find a semblance of soul, at the bottom of this satin vixen? Can I make him feel regret, pain for his guilty acts?

Now I'm just a regular

I don't need much

I don't need a Cadillac car

Or diamonds and the like

But the woman I hold

She must have a soul

And then I'm richer than the richest gold

If the woman has a soul

I supposed, lips pursed in thought, if I couldn't make her see regret ... Save her from harm. For the sake of this woman.

Well i don't need a woman

He has a lot of class

Because class in a woman

I don't mean it's going to last

I need some kind of woman

When I hold it, it's fine, yeah

Oh, and when she throws it at me

I give in without fighting

I wonder and my mind went away from reality. Would Phiona be worthy of life? Was this woman capable of love, of adoration for our lord gods? Why are we here if not to save the souls of the living? She was going to give me what I asked for.

———————————————————————————————————————

I pulled Mason's hand forcing him to move faster, tonight I plan to sleep with him and then extort from him all the money he had at his disposal. Despite the fact that there is talk of one of my former cash cows, Jack Anderson. A rich idiot to whom I almost empty the bank account, we broke almost 3 months ago but I didn't care much about his fate, the main thing is that he had given me the money which I need it at this time.

Going to the door, I saw Grace in front, I threw my arms around her neck. "Tryna got me in trouble." Grace stepped back, holding me at arm's length. "If Missy finds out -"

"Yeah, tell Missy I'm saying hello to her, huh?" I kissed Grace's cheek damply, leaving a large red spot. "I will see you tomorrow."

"Very well dear ." She took Mason's arm as we went out, stopping on the way. "Look here, stranger." She tilted her head towards me. "Be nice to her. Or I'll kill you with your bare hands." "Of course." This Grace scared me a bit at the time, her intense brown eyes weren't playing games. With Mason we left the bar.

"Grace is just too protective." Mason turned his gaze to mine. "You know they say our lord pays attention to drunkards and fools? Well, Grace too. Come on, Mason, faster. I'm going to pass out for lack of a burger."

When I got to the parking lot, several men called me and whistled. I ignored them completely, more concerned with eating. Even those who shouted "Marry me!" full lungs. "Run, Mason! Where did you park?"

"This way!" He ran and pulled me. Light rain had started to fall. He opened the passenger door of his car for me and I watched him get behind the wheel of the car.

The car started. I put the hat back on her head and shook my wet curls. "This weather will numb my hair." From my black purse, I pulled out a black scarf and tied it to her hair. I felt Mason's gaze fall on me, and I turn my head towards him. "It's okay?"

"Yes." He walked around the building with my instructions, sometimes waiting for drunks to knock on the car window to whistle at me. "Left on the main highway. Good show tonight?" "You were fantastic." "Oh, thank you, Mason." I caressed her thigh, while giving her a sweet smile. "What was your favorite song?" I lit a new cigarette while waiting for an answer.

"Um ..." He took a moment before turning his glance briefly towards me then again towards the road, finally he answered me. "I liked the one where you stole my hat and my glass of brandy."

"Yeah?" I started to watch it. "I liked this one too. Only about six kilometers here on the left. A place called Popie. You will see the sign." "Thank you." I giggled, "You are definitely a different type from the men I usually hang out with, Mason." He seemed surprised by my statement and retorted, "Oh? Does that mean?"

I shrugged, some like explaining to him without telling him too much about me. "I don't know. Polite, a bit distant. And you haven't kissed me passionately yet. So it's refreshing." He blushed slightly about me. "I would never do that."

"Never? Could that be disappointing." "Never against the will of a lady anyway," he said, giving me a smile. "Lady?!" I laughed again, he is really different from the others. "Now I know you come from a family educated to treat a little lady bar singer!"

"I happen to think you are a lady." He looked at me. "Who happens to be very beautiful, and talented. And even more wonderful things that I hope to discover over time." I sobered up. Well, not really sobered up. I could say that I was drunk. But suddenly I got serious. "It's nice, Mason. Do you think so?" "I always say what I mean." But have I ever told the truth or put someone else to my advantage except Faustus, right? "... I'm starting to starve."

"Yeah me too." I looked through the window, contemplating the night night in front of me. I clear my throat a bit before speaking. "Thanks for taking me out of this bar."

I felt him think about these next words and asked anyway but before uncertainty. "Do ... do many men kidnap you like this?"

"A girl has to eat," I took a pocket mirror out of my bag and refreshed my lipstick. "But I will say that you are a much better company than them, really beautiful and nice" My fingers touched his ear and I felt an abominable sensation overwhelm me as if I touched a fire that burned my hand. I withdraw my hand quickly and my gut tells me to get out of this car now. " Stop the car ! " " Sorry ?" "Stop the car now!" "He stopped dead in the middle of the highway, I started to open the door when he grabbed my arm. An expression of dismay adorned his face and his contact burned me as before, a not painful but strange redemptive burn, as if my soul was no longer so black.

I pulled my arm out of his grip, I succeeded after a few seconds when he fully released his grip on me. I ran out on my stilettos, the car distributed shortly after I got out of it. I teleported to my apartment still in shock and not realizing what was going on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So a chapter a little short and perhaps messy but I hope it has been interesting, tell me in comment your theories on who is this Mason Miller and why he wants to know more Zelda. I await them with pleasure 😊❤️


	12. A single moment of joy cannot always dispel sadness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We all want to be happy in life, to have a life without worries or concerns except the ones we care about. But we are not all lucky and we are not all happy, yet for a second we can have the illusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry I did not put it a day earlier and I also have something else to forgive myself. I realized a week ago that I forgot to put a bit of the previous chapter and I am really sorry. So I finished it so I told you where to resume reading, it's at the level of "What are we talking about,honey?" Until the end of the first song. Always sorry and good reading 😊❤️
> 
> Ps: take out the handkerchiefs (I cried while writing this chapter so maybe you too)

Zelda's apartment, New Orleans, 1927

The sun was shining dimly in the cloudy autumn sky through the apartment's large picture windows, November is a special time for me. "Happy birthday, my little devil." I exclaimed as I walked towards Eleanor with a big cake topped with chocolate with three white candles placed on top, Eleanor looked up from the book she had been reading for an hour. My life has changed for three years now and for good for once, without my daughter, I would never have wanted to escape from Ivan's clutches. Without it my existence would be only perpetual torture, shameless lie and bloody tragedy.

" Yes !" Eleanor put her book down and sat down next to me on the living room floor, I replaced a lock of red hair behind her ear and smiled tenderly at her. I think I got lost in his hazel eyes because after a while I thought I saw Ivan's hateful eyes in front of me, piercing through my soul and destroying me interior. I quickly removed my hand from her cheek and looked away from hers as if her touch had burned me. Whenever I looked her in the eyes too long, flashbacks of my life spending with Ivan came back to me. I thought too often of Ivan for my taste. Eleonore had started to interested too closely about the candles and having fun putting her hand on top of the glowing flames. "It burns, mom"

"Don't touch the flames or you risk burning us all alive ... Okay," the little redhead nodded, but didn't distract from the flames. "Now blow out the candles and make a wish."

After a moment of silence, she put out the candles as I had shown her the year before when she was two years old. Of course, the candles did not explode the first time. When they were finally off, I clapped and leaned over to whisper in his ear, "What did you want?" before I walk away from her to wait for her reaction.

"It's a secret, mom!" Eleanor began to smile with a sly little laugh and turned to her cake while licking her lips with greed.

"I suppose so." I started cutting a piece of cake for Eléonore, then a bigger one for me. It was then that the sound of the doorbell rang throughout the apartment, the uninvited guest seemed furious as he began to knock vigorously and relentlessly on the door. I began to sigh heavily, rolling my eyes masterfully. I had said over and over again overly oppressive admirers that I didn't want to do anything with them anymore and that if he was a former lover of mine it wouldn't change the fact that I didn't want to see them. What was finished between them and me had to remain so. But the man standing in the doorway was neither an overly oppressive admirer nor an ex-lover. He was the owner of the apartment.

"Wait two short minutes, my little devil." I turned to Eléonore who already had a bite of chocolate cake in her hand and several traces of frosting on her face. His brown eyes followed me to understand what was keeping me busy and landed on the man who entered the apartment and walked into the kitchen.

I was already following him closely, when we were alone, I gave him a false smile while saying to him: "Ah, Mr. Keltz, how nice to see you. What brings you?" My voice was sarcastic, which Mr. Keltz probably hadn't caught on right away.

Mr. Keltz was an older man. He wore a knife suit and a black bowler hat. He had sold the apartment to me for a year or more now and everything was going well or nearly so. I got a good deal with this man, that I would pay part of it and then pay the rest in small installments each month. However, I was miserably lagging behind on said payments with little work and a young child to care for, that didn't help matters. Mr. Keltz lived in Salem, so seeing him here was a bad sign, the problem must be urgent.

"Hello Phiona." I always hated who calls me by my first name, I have the decency to call him by his last name, he should do me the same honor. But I guess since I'm just a little bar singer, it's a privilege that I'm not entitled to. "I am afraid that my visit is not entirely in good condition."

"Let me guess." I started to tell him dryly while crossing my arms in front of my chest, "You want the next payment."

Mr. Keltz nodded. "Yes girl. You know our agreement, Phiona. You send me a lovely check every two months and I stay away from your business."

"Oh come on, Sean." I decided to call him by his first name and to do a pout while making my puppy eyes sad. "It's my daughter's birthday."

Mr. Keltz looked briefly at the living room where Eleanor was sitting, still with a piece of cake in her hand and her lips covered in frosting. She began to look at us with calm but curious eyes when she realized that we were watching her. Mr. Keltz turned his attention back to me and sighed while looking up at the ceilings, he always had a soft spot for children and that was where I could attack to soften him. Especially with the story of our life so unconventional. "Look Phiona, I can't keep coming here just to listen to an apology. You are four months behind on your payment. The last time I asked for it, your child was in the hospital."

"Well, she was." A few weeks ago, Eléonore decided to cast a mental control spell on her nurse for the former no longer disturbs her in her occult arts practices. Unfortunately for her, the spell has backfired, causing severe fevers, body aches and upset stomach. I could have treated her with potions or a ointment but not being there, the nurse brought her at the hospital for fear that the syntones would intensify.

Mr. Keltz sighed heavily once more, looking away from Eleanor who was still munching on his birthday cake. She had now managed to finish her little piece and then grabbed my piece of the cake with her little hand and started eating it. "Very good. You are lucky that you are not the only one for whom I have driven so long since Salem." "Why else are you here?"

"I'm selling Mr. Staten's apartment." Mr. Staten’s apartment, on the same floor as mine, was a lonely, cold man. "Apparently old Mr. Staten is dead and I have to re-let the place now. I'm going to clean up and pray that someone will take it quickly." "Well good luck with that." The apartment was pretty run down and old from what I saw through the front door. She could not imagine who would want to live there unless repairs were made to it.

"Thanks. I'm leaving now, but I'm waiting for a check next month, Phiona." He says as he walks with me behind him towards the door. I opened the door and he stepped forward to leave but not before to raise eyebrows significantly. "Yeah, yeah, you'll get your check."

Mr. Keltz waved goodbye to Eléonore, left with nothing else behind him than a new problem to overcome and a creator to pay. I waited statically in front of the closed door, rested my head on the wood of the door as a wave of sadness due to my helplessness came over me and I breathed unevenly. "Damn shit." Once I got my breath, I turned to my daughter and gave her a bright, fake smile. "Okay, where were we?" I suddenly stopped in the middle of a sentence when I saw the cake overturned on the white carpet and Eléonore's face covered with icing. "Oh, my love. What did you do?" She held back a smile and even a laugh at the more adorable and funny sight, "I just wanted more cake". She looked at me with her beautiful brown eyes puzzled while drilling the remains of the cake on the ground in her mouth, I grabbed a towel and wiped my face. "Let's not be so greedy from now on otherwise you will get stomach upset again."

Eleanor giggled and continued to eat despite my ban. I didn’t know how to comment I was going to pay the next payment, but I was thinking of something quickly and will quickly get out of this nameless hell. I'm still done and survived it. When Eleanor finished eating, I wiped her dirty face and the little hands with all the sticky ice cubes and the crumbs. Eléonore has always managed to get dirty when she ate or when she did anything in general. "You're clean again." I exclaim once I cleaned everything up. "Are you ready to open your gift?"

Eléonore's big doe eyes opened with excitement. "Yes!" She was standing and clapping her hands while hopping.

"I'll give it to you, but be patient, honey." The money was tight but I am still sure that I saved enough money to get Eleanor a gift up to what other kids can get. "Now sit here and close your eyes. No cheating, is that understood? "Eléonore instantly did what she was told and covered her eyes with her hands. I got up from the floor and went to a room next to where the gift was waiting. When I reappeared, I was holding in my hands a gigantic dollhouse and a small box decorated with black gift paper and a black satin bow on top. I placed it in front of Eleanor who was still in the same position and sat down opposite her. "You're ready?" Eleanor nodded impatiently, burning up and down in excitement.

"All right, open your eyes."

Eleanor opened her eyes and instantly her mouth fell. "Wow, mom!" She jumped from her sitting position and ran towards the house, dazed with excitement. She walked around the still amazed gift and looked up at me. "Is it mine?" She asked in disbelief, but the question didn't even arise until it was obvious, but I smiled tenderly at her before saying, "Absolutely." I spotted the dollhouse a few days ago in the window of a toy store.

Of course, I had to haggle with the seller for this and finally got it for a reasonable price. I could probably have used this money for groceries or helped pay for the apartment, but his smile is worth the sacrifice, it is worth all the horrors I go through. "Do you like?" Eleanor passed her hand along the roof of the house. "Obviously!" She ran to me, wrapping her arms around my neck and I hugged tight, "Thank you, mom."

"You're welcome, my little devil. Now I'm giving you the second." I opened the small black box to reveal a magnificent oval gold pendant in which was placed in the center a black diamond and on the back an inscription "the whole world could be destroyed that I would still love you - Mom" I hung around his neck and caressed her cheek lovingly. We looked at each other like that for a little while then I broke the silence that was installed in the room. "Go play with your gift now, it's your birthday after all! "

Eléonore was completely delighted and started to take out her dolls to play with her new toy. We left for the park later in the afternoon to allow her to spend time with children her age as she is almost constantly locked up at home.

When the sun started to set, I warn Eléonore wanted to be time to go home and she followed me obediently and without protest major . Eléonore had spent the whole afternoon playing in the playground, running all over the place, to jump and lots of other things that kids his age do. She was totally delighted to finally go out for a little while and was a little upset when I told her it was time to go back but that tomorrow she could go with her nanny the next day. After dinner, I gave her a bath and put her to bed. Eleonore was so exhausted from her big day that she was almost asleep as soon as I got her out of the tub. She didn't even wait until she was dressed in her pajamas and she fell asleep in my arms.

I kissed her on the forehead in addition to having said good night to her and left her room, only giving the night light on because she was afraid of the dark, which is completely normal for her age despite that she did not don't say it, I knew it. I crossed the apartment, now devoid of any agitation, to head to the kitchen where I had to clean and wash the dishes, something that I was not really excited about.  
I stopped for a moment in cleaning the dishes and leaned heavily against the sink to blow a little irregularly. Those moments of silence during the last hours of the night that brought unwanted memories. Memories of my life from Zelda Kamakarof, a life that had devoured me completely to a point where my judgment due right and wrong had been and is still being altered as well as the madness which overwhelmed me little by little but I never lived this nightmare only a short time so that the real me never disappears forever. Not long enough for madness to completely paralyze me, but long enough for me to leave with night terrors and horrible flashbacks of Ivan and my other destructive acts.

I tried to hide her failures from Eleanor as best I could, but many things sent me back to those horror moments in Russia. I had struggled a lot to get back on my feet after being freed from Ivan's clutches and his grip on my mind as if he had previously wiped out part of my judgment and my personality to make me a monster devoid of feelings, which he managed to end. I am no more than the shadow of the bright star that I was before I met him even if I had had many disappointments.

But not once did I forget him, Ivan Kamakarof, I found him stuck in my head like a parasite and I saw him every day in front of me through the eyes of my daughter.

I leaned more firmly against the sink and left all of my weight against it so that it could overcome it. Everything came so suddenly. My hands gripped the counter firmly, trying not to get lost but the flashback hit me hard. "No no no!" I first clapped my hands on the counter then, in my rage, I hit a glass cup and sent it crashing to the ground. I stepped back from the sink, crashing into the kitchen table mumbling incoherent words, but you could hear me saying the name "Ivan" several times and practically fighting an imaginary form. I quickly shook my head, denying the atrocities going on in his mind. "No!"

"Mum?" The little voice came and I turned to see Eleanor standing there at the kitchen door, her teddy bear in one hand while the other was rubbing her eyes to readjust them to the light. Then she looked around the kitchen with confusion.

I started to frown when I saw her. "I don't want you here!" I then leaned against the counter, my eyes moving away and I no longer saw our reality. "I'm not in love with you! I hate you." Slowly, I slid on the kitchen floor next to the broken glass. I put my face in my hands and yelled, "I don't want to go through this again! Get out of my head, shit!"

Eleonore approached me, paying attention to the broken glass and the mess I had created in the room. It was not the first crisis I had in front of Eléonore or the only. "Don't cry, mom." Said Eleanor placing her hands on my right arm. She tilted her head to the side to see my hysterical face.

"I begged your father not to touch me." I repeated, swinging back and forth. Eleanor smiled weakly and wiped my tears with her trembling little fingers, "You will feel better soon."

I looked at the precious face of my daughter. I was slowly starting to remember where I was, what time it was, who she was and who to talk to. "He will be back." I started whispering, stroking Eleanor's face, "I don't want him to take me away from you."

Eleonor snuggled against my chest and let me hold her, despite having disturbed her in my hysteria, wrap my arms around her as if to be one with her. I was still not completely in our reality but I was slowly starting to recover. I took a deep breath and calmed down. "Don't cry, mom. Nothing will separate you from me." Eleonor warmly repeated to bring me back to her. I kissed my daughter's head and put my dry tears on my cheek for a while. Eleanor was like a lighthouse, helping me find the continent across a raging sea that wanted to surround me at twenty sous the seas.

I brought her closer to me to give her a minimum of comfort, "Mom is fine now, Mom is fine. Everything will be alright, I promise you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote a more cute but sad chapter, I spent hours writing this chapter because I'm a real drama queen and it's hard for me when everything goes well so I had to put sad passages for I like that and I hope you like it too. 😊❤️


	13. The soul is lowered by vice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She just wants to forget the horrible things that happen to her, like everyone else. But sooner or later we are confronted with the harsh reality of our existence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a long chapter, but I wanted to write it, and I love what I wrote. So enjoy, the next chapter will have more action and ending. Good reading ❤️

New Orleans, 1927

I moved away from the cries of agony I uttered, disturbing flashbacks, unhappy eyes empty of all the emotion I wore. Every single one of my steps get away from it all.

And it felt good not to be her anymore. The click closes stilettos on the cold stone floor. The sensation of the smooth cream of the lipstick that covers your mouth with a exquisite tint and gives such a tasty taste to each kiss. The slight tickling in the neck and on the ears of my red curls which move according to my movements. Feeling steadfast for a second, just feeling good again even if it's for a short time. Disguise my suffering under these artifices which only mask the pain but do not soothe it. I haven't recognized myself for a long time - I am no longer this seductive woman who charms men not for money but for her good pleasure, the one who smiles without being forced to do so, the one who was not yet destroyed by life. I walked past Grace without looking back - though she caught her eye a lot as I passed. Seeing those eyes follow me, then look away when I passed her. Maybe she thought she knew this woman who was walking sensually out of the bar.

But she didn't recognize me, not for a moment as if I were a stranger to her.

She knew me as Phiona, a simple inventions that I created from scratch. She only knew Zelda Spellman. And this evening, Zelda Spellman went out to console my soul in pain and make me believe that everything is as before my departure for Paris. That nothing has changed in the end, that I will go home, to my family home in Greendale. That Faustus will always be mine and that my family will still support me when I fall because of my continual mistakes.

I hadn't been Zelda for several years now, I have been Phiona for three long unbearable years but have I ever been one of these two people? Am I still someone behind all these trials? Is there still the illusion of a person under my protective facade that I have forged over time? I ask myself too many questions instead of just letting go.

I hadn't set foot in this bar for years, the simplest reason is that Faustus had brought me for the first time in this bar because he did not want to be accosted by acquaintances in Greendale . So we fled to New Orleans to spend some time together without outside interference. Just him and me in a crowded bar, yet I couldn't see anyone other than him.

I pushed open the door to the bar and felt all the men's eyes twisted in my direction, following me in each of my movements that I carried out to the bar.

Despite the time that had passed since my last appearance in this place, like all bars, that had not changed. Always the same tired oak for the bar counter, the green brass rubbed by drunken fingers looking for a balance that is both literal and metaphorical. The same bald footstool a little wobbly that they had not changed even if several people had fallen from them. Same speckled mirror in which I put my lipstick under the watchful eyes of Faustus sitting by my side. The same old Wurlitzer stifling the hits in the background. Maybe even the same tired old bartender as he was years ago, slightly squinting in one eye after spending a lifetime telling bullshit stories from customers.

Nothing had changed but a person was missing by my side.

I didn't need his attention anyway, I don't need anyone. I don't want their overwhelming morale on the way I behave. I wanted a drink, I needed a drink. And the shady bartender was willing to respond to my request and will not judge me for my actions. I wanted alcohol. Whiskey. Gin. Martin. Vodka

Just saying the words made me drool in advance. The alcoholic's curse will follow me all my life and will never leave me except when I die. More powerful than every prayer I say. More powerful than the piety I have towards Lucifer. A drinking passion that brings me warmth and comfort. It was comforting unlike life which only destroys me slowly. Contrary to the truth that ravages me when I look deep inside my soul in a mirror. These things so confused, so disturbing that persecute me. Maybe I did want peace alone.

It is in this libation that I would find the solution to my problems. The honesty that I looked for in everyone I met. Where no one else, anywhere else, has been able to find these things that I despair of looking for. But not anymore because you can't find it thanks to science, neither thanks to religion, nor in myself.

I saw my reflection in the dirty mirror behind the massive bar. Through the aligned bottles of alcohol and the cocktail glasses, I looked ... dead. What has happened to me?

The gin burned my tongue, my throat, my stomach beautifully. Lucifer perfumed in hellfire, Lucifer lingered in his crystal flame burning me intoxicating. Praise be to Satan, so good to find my bad habits. I sipped slowly, resisting the urge to throw it into my mouth like a thirsty man.

Not that I couldn't. I could drink just as much even more than a man under, at any table, any day or time of day. Then climb above the man and kiss him languidly while our tongues are tangled. Shit. Where does this thought come from? I cross my legs, clutching my thighs together and diverted my mind from the lustful images that came to me. Still whore, Zelda ...

Again, my reflection made fun of me, reminding me of who I was before sadness took over my features. I got my lipstick from my purse and applied it to my plump lips. A quick touch-up couldn't hurt.

I tapped a cigarette on the marbling bar.

"What is your poison, darling?"

I looked blatantly at the messenger, the cigarette pressed between my lips. I openly stared at him, establishing the type of man I was dealing with, accomplishing this feat in less than two seconds. Probably at the beginning of thirty years. The hair was clean enough to be cared for, but not clean enough to be married. These nails were clean, beautiful blue eyes. An arrogant smile appeared on his face ... but something questionable was hidden behind his look on him.

A flame lit near my face. His lighter ignited my cigarette as if the heat that emanated from the flame was in fact the heat of our bodies intertwined under the sheets. I replied, a charming smile on my lips. "Tonight?" I blew cigarette smoke away from his face. "Maybe you ."

"Don't tell me lies, beautiful." Yes, there had been a doubt, the same doubt that I saw shining in those eyes when he approached me. I immediately identified this feeling because I only know it too well. His fear of rejection was almost delicious, but not as deliciously creamy as the slight tingling in my pelvis when he dropped his hand on my thigh. The bartender approached us and my companion made a sign towards my glass and raised two fingers to order his own drink.

"It's a sin to lie" I leaned a little closer to him to be sure the music wouldn't cover my voice.

"What is it going to take to make you a sinner tonight?"

I started giggling softly. "What is your name?" The temptation to call him "child" was strong. He had a kind of childish doubt in his attitude. I avoided calling it that, imagining her bare back under my sweaty palms.

"I'm Liam." He then presented himself to me officially, an outstretched hand to make me like a handshake. But when I took it to shake it, he twisted my wrist gently and kissed it.

I watched her soft lips touch my hand and not let go for the moment. " Liam." I started to smile charmingly again, if I got one thing from him, I had to draw him into my yarns. "It's a good classic name."

"To tell the truth ..." He stroked my fingers slowly, taking his time to trace patterns on my skin, not really releasing my hand now that he had it. "Everyone calls me Li."

I took my hand from its grip abruptly, while keeping my eyes fixed on hers. "Li." I gave him a haughty look before retorting, "I prefer Liam." And I could see he would prefer Liam too. He wanted to be more than a simple man who is given a nickname as bland as Li, tonight. And that was my chance. His fingers were elegant and soft, not the fingers of a worker or someone who works outdoors. Maybe ... a banker or an accountant because of his neat dress style? I looked into his blue eyes hopefully for a fruitful meeting between the two of us. Certainly no longer an accountant.

"And uh ... apart from beautiful, what can I call you, darling?"

I start playing with the curls of my hair to hide the inner dilemma I was facing. Should i lie? Do not lie? This one is hardly dangerous. "Zelda."

"Zelda!" He had taken my hand and held it, now playing with his fingers. "Seductive." The bartender slipped my second martini in front of me. "A bit like you even if you are much more bewitching than your name."

And at that, I burst out laughing softly and sensually, my head thrown back to shake my hair. I couldn't help tormenting him by teasing him. Whore one day, whore always. But I took her right hand in mine, pulling it over my lap. "You are sweeter than sugar, aren't you?"

"I would like to be, if you allow me." He impatiently licked his lips, happy to have amused me with these flattering comments. "I bet it's sweet too." His fingers, already on my knees now, caressing my thigh up and down suggestively.

The little teasing caress sent a burst of luminous pleasure directly to his eldest. Damn, it's been too long. I almost lost the focus of the discussion when I got lost in the feeling. "It could be." My free hand caressed the contours of his jaw. "With the appropriate encouragement."

"Mm." He reassessed me, more carefully this time, taking his time to drag my gaze along my curves. The look alone made me want more than a look. "Well, I can be very motivating, Zelda." "Good you know."

"Where are you from? I'm a regular here and ... I've never seen you before."

A regular ... since when? She wondered. God, he's even younger than I thought. "I live here. I'm just ... busy about work for a long time now." He hissed softly. "It's a bit of a job to keep you so concerned."

I quietly sipped my martini and winced at first when the liquid burned my throat. The second was always the strongest, but after the second, the palate is anesthetized from sip to sip. "It's ... crazy. But I'm working hard. How about you?"

He swallowed, nodding. "I'm uh ... I'm an accountant." I knew it ! My instincts have never failed me. "So yes, you know ... as hard as this job can be." He shrugged, now pulled my hand over his own lap. He is embarrassed as if his work makes him uncomfortable. Probably because his career was not the most virile ...

"Attention to details." My fingers went up to the inside of his thigh, not to his groin, although by the way he wobbled on his stool, you would think I had touched him in a more intimate way.

"Well. I have to be careful with people's money. You know how it goes."

"Mm-hm. I admire a young man with a good solid work ethic." Even if my finger traced only the gray fabric of his pants. He almost moans under my touch. "How long ... have you been an accountant, Liam?"

His insinuations were not lost to him. "Long enough to be satisfied." "I suppose !" I slapped her on the knee.

He sobered up from the trance I put him in. "No. For three years now. Since I left the service." He hissed when I tickled behind his knee. "Hey!" He grasped my stray fingers with a hard grip, smiling clearly before answering, "Zelda, don't start something, you don't want to end this night."

"Well, maybe I need something" I removed his hand from his thigh to light another cigarette and when he saw me holding a cigarette, he took out one in turn and we smoked in unison . "The question is: how are you able to accomplish a task?"

"I like to take my time for this kind of task." He looked at his glass before taking a sip from his libation. "Make sure the job is done well so that everyone is satisfied."

"Hm." I traced the outline of my glass with my finger before looking up to meet hers. He was so similar to these Faustus that his was almost disturbing. "I congratulate you on your love at a job well done." He raised his glass to toast and I followed him by raising mine. "Well done to us, Zelda."

"This too."

We smoked for a while, in silence even though I could feel those eyes devouring me, certainly imagining myself already naked. I looked around, pretending to be interested in other clients and possible lovers for the night.

As with each, it boils his blood in these veins. Making him decide to make a decision as soon as possible before I slip him through the fingers.

Liam clears his throat. "Zelda, wouldn't you like to end this pleasant evening with me in my apartment?" He didn't see my slow smile spread across my face. "It sounds awfully nice."

"Get your stuff. I have to use the boys' room."

I started to calmly put my things away and took my coat which was on the stool next to me. I went to the ladies' room to catch my mind for a few moments. Inside, I gauged my drunkenness to see if I was still in control of my movements and my mind. The room was fairly stable, I could still differentiate all the floor tiles.

Did I drink three drinks? Two that I ordered, then the one that Liam paid me ... No, I'm not dead drunk. Just drunk. And drunk was good enough to break my good judgment, just enough to send me back to a stranger's bed. I cool off a bit by running water over my cheeks, my cheeks were now blushing because of the alcohol I had drunk. On a whim, I took the ring from my fingers, throwing it in the trash. It was a gift that Faustus had given me for my twentieth birthday but he had given it to Zelda and I am not that woman, any more now. I don't need anything from them.

Coming out of the bathroom, I looked for Liam, he was not harnessed to the bar as I thought. I have a brief moment of concern. Has he abandoned me? Inconceivable. I started to look out the door, then felt strong hands wrap around my waist. "I never looked for you everywhere." His warm breath against my ear made me shiver. "I thought you were gone."

"You can't think for a second that I'll leave you, Zelda." He took my arm again, gently. Yet others do it before you and they never come back to save me. "Let's go."

The night air was cool, so cold it was almost palpable. As if the air were ice, piercing us like a dagger. I chuckled as soon as the cold hit her face. "What?" Liam asked, looking at me.

"Fucking cold here."

"I'll warm you up soon enough, baby." He helped me to put on my fur coat, then drew insistently on my arm so we could move on. "I live about two blocks away. Do you mind walking?"

"As long as it's fast." I started off, clicking on my stilettos next to him. We met many faces in the street all different and oddly similar in one point. People laugh, talk, argue but their common points were that they felt a few things, even if not positive. Passed by a few more bars, the bosses stood at the doors of the building to harpoon future customers, smoke escaping from the doors as if hell were hidden in these places of perdition.

It was liberating to relive that. Pressing against the cold concrete, Liam's arm kept me close to him, keeping me warm against his solid body. Near an intersection, he slows down. "Zelda. I didn't have one ... you know. Condom." He hung an inch toward the pharmacy. "I can -"

I put a finger against his lips, preventing him from finishing that sentence. "I think we are safe, Liam." I wouldn't dream of damaging a fragile male ego, but ... He didn't know I had taken a contraceptive potion.

"Oh." He smiles shyly. "Yeah, I wasn't worried about the clap or anything. Just ... you know. Babies." I laughed openly. "No babies here." A quick kiss. "Except you ."

"Oh I see!" He took her in stride, tickling her ribs as they advanced. "I assure you that I am far from being a child, baby."

I squirmed under his fingers, giggling. "I will believe it when I see it." "You will believe it when you feel it!"

Liam's apartment building was frequented by single men as much: an old hotel converted into an apartment. I knew a lot about this kind of place, I might even have been to this one before when I slept with strangers. "Sorry Zelda, but the elevator is out of order. As usual." I studied Liam as they climbed the mosaic stairs. In the soft light, his face was smooth. This one was probably a baby the last time I was in a place like this…

The hike to the tenth floor left us slightly breathless. His key turned in the lock while I hardly caught my breath, then he led me inside. He gently took my coat and hung my purse on a wall hook. It was small. And luckily dark, so he could become whoever I wanted without being distracted by his face. The only light that crossed the room was that of the window, the light of the city filtered by an opaque and worn curtain.

Not that I was lucky enough to really treat my environment in detail because in a few seconds I was against the door and Liam was against me.

"Oomphmmr." I mumbled against his sloppy, desperate lips. My arms wrapped around his neck and I jumped up against him. Her hands were all over me, looking for a zipper or a button on the dress, an access point to remove myself from my clothes.

It doesn't have the same effect as him, she thought ridiculously. He broke away from his kiss to attack my pale neck. "Here, baby." An awkward reach for its side zipper and as soon as it was opened, her hand was inside, caressing a red satin slip.

I was also busy with my hands. Pushing his jacket off his shoulders, removing the buttons on his shirt, resisting the idea of brutally tearing his shirt from his chest without taking any precautions. She was working on his pants when he decided to take care of her dress. "Raise your arms!" I raised my arms and he pulled the dress from my body. The hem touched my cheek as he passed it over my head and, amusingly, he had the good sense to hang it on a hook too. "Fuck, Zelda." His hands memorized me at each curve. "Built like a Greek goddess."

No more kisses. He moaned when I stroked his erection through his white cotton boxers. He took off his shoes and ripped off his pants from his feet, tossing him aside. "You're a fucking bomb, aren't you?"

"Not too bad yourself, Liam." You couldn't call him a muscular boy. He had the body of an accountant, a simple body, but thin enough to promise an elegant fuck.

———————————————————————————————————————  


"It was hard work, darling." He drew delicate drawings on my back with his fingers and tender kisses, always fascinated by every inch of my body. "Was it worth it?"

"Yes." I mumbled dryly against the pillow, just starting to catch my breath and reconnect to our reality. A reality in which I had lost control again and slept with the first comer.

He kissed the top of my head and inhaled the scent of my hair. "I could watch you all day." These fingers still caressed me, the pressure increasing. Transforming his light touch into a relaxing massage. I felt myself drifting under the caress, thinking of nothing more than the soothing touch of his hands against my back. He wrapped me in his arms so that we were one.

And my eyes suddenly opened as if I had just woken up from the trance in which he had plunged me. No. There could be no caresses between us, no sweet things that only people who care for each other do, no sleep in his arms. It was a primitive itch to feel affection after sex and nothing more. It was safe, no traps of weak and worthless emotional attachments.

I squirmed under him, fleeing the shame of my body and my treacherous spirit who did not want to be drowned under the affection of a man and I went slowly into his bathroom. Cleansing my body but also my mind of these aimless aspirations. I didn't look at myself in the mirror, I didn't want to see the woman over there who was laughing at me. Old Zelda Spellman or whoever she is. I'm a bitch and that's all I know how to be ...

Back in his room, he was sitting against the headboard. Reaching out with open arms in a very familiar way. They all believed that I would run in their arms for comfort. "Come to bed, Beauty."

I put on my sly armor to avoid reality. My reality. Who is that I need that. "I'm not very cuddly." Let him kiss you, however, don't let him see through you. He put my face in his neck and moaned in satisfaction. "Close your eyes, and go to sleep." Please.

"So can you sneak away from here?" I did not deny the accusation because I only wanted that. "No. I'm taking you for a good breakfast in the morning. We both need it after this workout."

I chuckled, offering him a symbolic answer even if I knew I would not be there soon. "I have a healthy appetite."

He yawned slightly. "I can not imagine." Kisses on my shoulders. I bit my lip, trying to ignore the fuzzy thing floating in my belly. "Fuck, Zelda ..."

I was so exhausted from my day that waiting for Liam's first snore had become unbearable. For the first relaxation I had with a man, those arms around my waist. For the gentle rise and fall of her chest. But the wait was so long that I took it to paradise.

I dreamed of a familiar face. Blue eyes that melt me at the first glance. A hand with a long pointed nail like the devil's claws, holding mine and a raspy and serious voice whispering in my ear "Zelda..."

So I never really knew you

God I really tried to

Blindsided, addicted

Felt we could really do this

But really I was foolish

Hindsight it's

obvious

Talking with my lawyer she said

"Where'd you find this guy?"

I said, "Young people fall in love"

"With the wrong people sometimes"

It was the music that woke me from my deep sleep. The muffled and crisp noise filtered through thin walls of radio paper. Oh, my Satan. The memories of the night ebbed like a tidal wave, drowning in incessant words. My head was pounding a bit because of yesterday’s alcohol, but not that my muscles were tight all over my body and made me suffer.

Some mistakes get made

That's alright, that's okay

You can think that you're in love

When you're really just in pain

Some mistakes get made

That's alright, that's okay

In the end it's better for me

That's the moral of the story babe

Oh oh

Oh-ooh-oh

Woo, oh

Oh-ooh

And that damn song that told me clearly that my love life was a waste without name ... I stifled a groan. I guess that's what we get for what we put through the walls last night. I glanced at my bedmate. He was sleeping deeply. Thank you, Lilith, for the little favors even if I don't deserve them. I rolled my eyes at my own antics, how can I be so irresponsible. Carefully, painfully, I reached out to him for my cigarettes and my lighter which was on the bedside table.

It's funny how a memory

Turns into a bad dream

When running wild turns volatile

Remember how we painted our house?

Just like my grandparents did, so romantic

But we fought the whole time

Should have seen the signs, yeah

The bed creaked when I slid out of it and I winced. But luckily I was safe, the soft-bodied accountant was sleeping soundly. I was beyond portraying myself, and couldn't belittle myself more than I did last night.

They say it's better to have loved and lost

Than never to have loved at all

That could be a load of shit

But I just need to tell you all

My dress and coat were still hanging on this hook. My bag on the ground. I gathered them quietly as if I would not risk being arrested at any time. A shoe ... Damn! The other ! I glanced under her bed and quickly found it. One last look in the apartment. To be sure that I hadn't left a trace of my passage so that it never goes back to me.

I couldn't make it a habit ... I couldn't get lost ... Not now that I had someone I could count on ... It was another habit that was waiting for me now. The door closed behind me in a din. The corridor was fortunately empty and I dressed with speed, I quickly descended barefoot and my pair of shoes in hand the stairs decorated with these horrible mosaic tiles for ... Finally, not freedom.

Back in hell, in my nightmare where the outward signs of salvation for my soul do not exist , except one can be .... My daughter. On the clean, early pavement, I slipped into my stilettos. I began to sigh strongly. Nothing will ever change. Leaving for my apartment, where I will not wait for Faustus, nor Hilda even Edward to miss me but I will find the love of my life. Eléonore and her sweet smile. What would I do without you, my little devil?

I will be lost deeper in the nothingness of my greedy souls.

Some mistakes get made

That's alright, that's okay

You can think that you're in love

When you're really just engaged

Some mistakes get made

That's alright, that's okay

In the end it's better for me

That's the moral of the story

But she has failed to remove all traces of its passage. Liam sighed heavily when he woke up, sitting in his otherwise empty bed, looking at the pillow on his lap still smelling its scent. At Ravish Me Red red lipstick, leave it near the nightstand. There are always traces that we leave, memories are part of it.

He assumed he would eat breakfast alone.

"Damn it, Zelda ... You bewitched me." he murmured.

I was walking on the quiet street when, I heard a person getting closer and closer to me. Slightly panicked, I accelerated my pace. Convinced that the person does not want to hurt me. But I could feel him getting closer and closer to me. Until I hear my name come out of her mouth.

"So you will never change Zelda? Always the same ! No redemptions possible for you! " He said close to my ear, I instantly recognized the voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this chapter . Leave a comment if you wanted your something in the next chapter and a kudos if you like the story ❤️


	14. Death can no longer take life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one escapes divine judgment, even you. We will all die one day, returning to our state of dust but before we will live. Only we can leave this Earth rather than planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't written in a long time, bla-bla-bla bla-bla-bla. We don't care a bit about my reasons so we go straight to the chapter and also sign the petition so that Sabrina is a final worthy of the name. Good reading ❤️

New Orleans, 1927

"So you will never change Zelda? Always the same ! No redemptions possible for you! " He said close to my ear, I instantly recognized the voice. Or rather his particular aura which was like redemptive when we get too close.

"We think you were different from the rest of your species, that you had taken this degrading path because you wanted to survive. But in truth, you are worse than your fellow men, you are more slutty, more sadistic and heartless than each of them." He continued whispering in my ear, I knew what was waiting for me, I wanted it for a long time but now I couldn't bring myself to just let go.

A tear clouded my vision, it escaped my control and rolled gently on my cheeks reddened by the cold. And I closed my eyes, trying to convince myself that I would overcome this living ordeal.

I reopened them. I felt the sharp, pointed tip of a blade go up the length of my right arm, tearing my red dress slightly, a thin streak of blood accompanied the opening which was the entire length. From my elbow to my shoulder, the plain has spread out, from the top of the shoulder he let the dagger run along my body then made it stop at my throat.

The dagger pressed more and more strongly against my neck, letting escape a few drops of blood, it did not cut my throat, making me hoped for a deliverance coming from nowhere and I agreed to hope. My breaths were shallow from second to second, the time was running out, life was flowing away from my body, the wind was treading my pale face due to the lack of oxygen, blood was flowing on my neck.

I could no longer hold my desire to close my eyes forever, it was a divine feeling to give in, but I did. In the darkness of my mind clouded by death, I see a face and only a face. Eleonore. I cannot leave her, I cannot ruin her life by my weakness, I cannot abandon her in this cruel world.

I opened my eyes wide, two tears do a frantic races on my face, animated by my last breath of life, I let go in my last and final breath: "Lanuae Magicae". I then teleport away to my apartment. The shape of Masson holding me remaining in the middle of the morning pavement still empty, arms stretched in the void, holding the void of my form disappeared.

No longer able to bear the attraction that my body had on the floor, I collapsed on the parquet floor in the living room, a muffled noise accompanied my fall. Little light steps approached my motionless form, which emptying of its blood on the floor. Two small soft hands spotted with freckles covered my throat, a Latin spell was pronounced and I already felt my pulpit recover. Eleonore continued to resist her spell, her eyes fixed on my wound which healed but with difficulty, her little fingers continue to trace the contours of the cuts to close it but even for a little witch as strong as my Eleonore, to see me so was unbearable for she . So she began to cry silently, wiping the tears from her face from time to time with the lapel of her dress.

Since the beginning of his arrival at my bedside, I could only fix the emptiness, not being able to hold my attention to a form without almost fainting as the effort required me strength which was now almost all exhausted. However, my gaze fell on Eleanor’s sweet face, the features of her face were tense with anxiety, she frowned in nervousness and had her mouth wide open while breathing heavily.

But those eyes conveyed perfectly how she felt. These two brown doe eyes were tearful, frightened, panicked, and waves of bitterness rippled inside. Usually so sparkling with curiosity, like two pools of golden honey in which life is only sweeter but there is an ocean raging in them now. I could feel her pain here from here so I reached for her cheek and gently chased the tears from her face with my thumb.

" I love you. You are the most beautiful thing that has happened to me in life. You know it, don't you? " She looked away from my closing wounds and nodded. I smile at her. "As you grew up. In a few years, you will do your somber baptism, you will then be under the protection of Satan forever." I continued, handing over the strand of hair that wandered in front of his face. I swallowed hard knowing what to say next. "If I'm not there to watch over you until your baptism and after, contact the wizard Faustus Blackwood. He will give you the education you will need. "

She nodded again in tears, she couldn't speak for the moment, and when she opened her mouth, only a groan output. Then a sentence, but almost inaudible between the little moans. "You won't leave me, mom. You will still live ...... "She was cut by heavy knocks on the door which intensified more and more to each of them, I knew who it was and what would happen to us if I did not stop our future massacre.

I crouch slowly, painfully on the carpet soaked with my blood. I felt better than a few minutes ago, but did I have the life force to kill Masson alone? I had very little, and to stand it was already hard enough.

I took Eleonore's face in my hands, getting lost in those eyes before kissing her nose. " Hide ! I'll come looking for you as soon as it's all over. " She glanced frightened at the door which trembled under the violent knocks of the man, then she followed my order and went to hide in her room. I stayed here, in the center of the very dark living room, the sounds of the door giving way under the blows and destroying itself in small pieces of wood.

Masson crosses the entry between the rubble, advancing towards me, a dagger in his hand which he never stopped do bouncing while sporting a big warm smile that did not match what was expected. When he was at my height, he crouched near me, I keep my gaze away from him, focusing on the landscape by the window. When Masson saw that I was not willing to pay him any attention, he took my chin between his fingers, forcing me to look at him and he groaned when he realized that I was casting a silent spell on him.

His nose, those lips, those ears oozed with fresh blood. The agony was near, I reveled in her suffering which brought me back to life. All smiles, I got up from my sitting position, the metallic stench of blood not affecting me as I walked towards Eleanor.

My hour of rejoicing was however short-lived because in a quick movement Masson had pressed me against the table nearby, the breakfast table was already set for morning. Plates crashed violently and abruptly on the floor now smeared with broken porcelain while. A fork stabbing my back and the tablecloth tighten around my bloody body. I winced and moaned as he climbed on top of me pinning my arms to the table. "Do you think you're done with me, dirty witch !" He hissed on my face.

Despite the situation, I couldn't help the sarcastic response that spread over my tongue from spurting out and running down my lips like viper venom. "Anyone with half a brain and two eyes could see that I was just starting with you. The game is just getting started, right? "

Masson was furious as he held the dagger against my neck again, determined to kill me but not without torturing me first. "Do you think you are smarter than me when you are nothing? I am a creature of Gods and in you there is nothing divine." I had felt that when I had come closer to him, God protect him. "Am I supposed to be terrified? The creatures of Gods are worth no more than shit."

Fury invades Masson like fire consumes every surface he touches. "You dirty monster." I rolled my eyes before retorting him: "One of us is a monster but it is not me."  
"Maybe I'll cut your tongue first so you can behave properly with your masters." He spat.

Her threats hardly scared me, Eleanor was safe, hiding behind an unstoppable concealment spell, I was no longer necessary if dying meant protecting her. I locked my green eyes on hers, my eyes showing no fear, just anger and a desire for revenge that haunted me inside. "You do not scare me." I said coldly, my face as expressive as that of a dead man.

"Maybe not, but you will plead for death before I'm done with you." He carried his dagger to my wrist tracing the veins of my pale skin, not tearing the skin but strongly enough to feel the sharpness of the blade. He looked at my pure hatred glistening with my eyes, "Be careful not to bite your tongue when you cry." Masson sneered before pressing the tip of his blade against my wrist, he waited until the pain gradually sinks into my body.

As the blade traced my skin, I mentally prepared myself for the pain that was to overwhelm me and when it came, I took a quick breath.

Then he moved the blade, made some kind of pattern or wrote something but I didn't care that the pain was immense. Then suddenly, the blade was removed, but shortly after being stabbed in his arm, this time more deeply, making me gasp out. Inside, outside, more blood was flowing on my arm, my head spinning with beating heart, I lost track of time.

Finally, the knife left and did not honor my bloodstained arm, I dared to open my eyes to look Masson in the face.

He became extremely annoyed that I had practically no dagger reaction in my pulpit, all I would do was breathe heavily and close my eyes for a long time. Finally, he brought out the blade of my arm before laughing heartlessly before adding with these: "It is time honored your other arm of the message of God ."

I didn't know if I could handle a lot more of this and keep my screams from escaping my lips to explode all over the room. Masson was still sitting above me and I felt him move so that he could cut his words in my other arm.

Pushing the weapon deeper into the skin again, I felt myself start groaning in pain and he giggled before sadistically saying, "This is the reaction I was looking for and the Lord was waiting for your redemption." Once again, he began to cut in my arm, sharper and slowly more dying on his part, torturing me more this time. This time I couldn't help it and my screams echoed in the previously well calm apartment. It was agony all the time and I squirmed under Masson trying to free myself from the grip of the blade in my flesh.  
He wanted to torment me, make me pay for what had happened to each person whose life was taken too soon through my fault, we were both drenched in my blood and when I finally shouted, that was enough to do even run the spirits to the beyond.

Masson apparently stopped trying to find his hearing before continuing. Then he seemed to have an idea: "Redemption cannot be completely without destroying you, which men covet most in you." He sneered as he pulled his knife out of my sore right arm and still sitting on top of me, he started to pull up my dress.

Fear jumped in my chest, and memories of Ivan came back screaming, I didn't mind dying but I hadn't thought about what could happen before my massacre. A kind of rape except that it will be a dagger which will tear my from the inside. I wouldn’t let someone destroy me like I’m just an unimportant toy , not again.

At Masson's stop in his approach, I tried my one and only chance of survival, my eyes wide open in search of a possible weapon, then I saw him, a steak knife. Grabbing it with my free arm, a glass fell from the table as I roared in pain using my newly injured arm. "Time is up" growled I plunging the knife into Masson's chest.

His eyes widened for a moment before locking onto mine and with the new realization that I was killing him, he took his dagger from the table where he had put it. "Time is up for both of us." He stabbed me in the shoulder. He was targeting my heart but missed it because life left him, he fell back on the cold floor of the room. My heartbreaking cry was the last thing he heard.

With the knife already soaked in my shoulder, I threw my head back and shouted, gasping heavily, trying to control myself as best I could. I struggled from the table, crawling on the floor which was a sea of blood and debris.

I couldn't go further than my shoulder was killing me , as was the continual blood loss. I collapsed in a bloody heap next to Masson's body, I was nothing more than a form previously alive, stained with blood and red hair. The dagger was still in his shoulder and I was bleeding nonstop.

———————————————————————————————————————

Black. It’s all around me, nothing on the horizon except ... the endless void. Neither heat nor freshness. Nothingness inhabiting this dimension and I was lying on my stomach on the ground.

Practically unconscious, my thoughts were disordered and I could not get up as my body made me suffer the martyr. I closed my eyes, seeking rest for a moment. I fell asleep, time passed but time did not exist in this dimension.

A misty figure came up to me, I lifted my head to better face what is approaching me. The figure had no face, it was only a pale form of smoke that trailed behind her. With my eyes practically closed, I dared to look at the shape that must have been his face. "What do you want from me?" These words came out of my mouth without my knowing it, the form took my face in his hands. His touch was ghostly, it was like it was like wanting to stand in the cloud, it immediately dissipated. "There is no time to die." She said calmly.

———————————————————————————————————————

I woke up with a start on the ground, soaking in a pool of blood with Masson's soft body next to me. I ran a hand over my shoulder to find the wound that would keep bleeding, starting to clot slowly. My body was still hurting but I could get up without fear of dying within minutes.

I straightened slowly, painstakingly and painfully to head for the room where Eleanor was still hidden. Leaning against the walls for advancing with difficulty, leaving on the white walls, prints of my palms stained red.

"Eleanor?" I looked in her room but she was empty of the little redhead, with brown eyes. The room was ransacked, the furniture was spread out on the floor, a window was broken and all the papers, toys and clothes were lying on the ground like the furniture. "Eleonore!" I panicked for my daughter's safety, shouting her name all over the apartment louder and louder every time I got no answer.

I rummaged through the whole cast iron apartment until I finally found her crying in my closet. Her head was buried in her arms and her little body was trembling with sobs. "By Satan, are you okay?" I fell to my knees near her, wrapping her in a tight, bloody embrace. Eleanor gave me her first look since I saw her again. Endless tears ran down his cheeks, and his brown eyes looked at me, begging for help. "Are you hurt?" Eleanor shook her head slightly. "Has anyone approached you?"

Eleanor wiped her tears with the back of her hands and forced her sobs to pull her back to speak clearly. She was a strong child and did not like to let others see her weaken just like me. She had always been like this since she was a baby. I remembered when she learned to walk, she tripped and fell but not once did she allow herself to cry.

I spread from her face the strand of rebellious hair that still slid out of her hairstyle and lifted her chin gently so that she looked me in the eyes again. "Tell me, my love." Eleanor sniffled a little and trembling, she said, "Dad was here, you had been dead for two days and he did not accept it."

I got worried. Ivan has found us for good, he will return soon, for me, for Eleanor. I knew it would someday happen, but I didn’t expect me to be dead for her return, unable to protect my daughter from this monster. It irritated me a lot , but I set it aside for the focus on my daughter's well being. "Oh no no. What did he do to you? What did he say to you?"

"He wanted you but didn't have you. He was not interested in me, did he? He started to get mad at me for not keeping you alive and .. "Her lips trembled strongly, tears threatening to return and flood her sweet face.

I sighed softly. I knew the day would come when Ivan's lack of fatherly tenderness would break the tender little heart of Eleanor. I just didn't realize it would happen so suddenly and so cruelly. So I sat down next to my crying daughter and she looked in front of her so as not to show me how she felt. "Eleonore." I pronounced her name gently and Eleanor instantly knew she had to listen to me carefully. "I want you to listen to me because this is a subject that is hard to say and I don't want to repeat myself." Eleanor stopped her sniffles and looked me straight in the eyes, still with her face melancholy.

"When you came into my life, i just know you were what i miss. I knew you would grow up for greatness and so far I have been right. You are a very special girl. You are smart, brilliant and oh so brave. "I looked at my daughter and smiled softly. I touched her cheek with the back of my hand and started talking again. "Now, never let anyone belittle you for who you are. The simple fact that you are not close to your father because he doesn't want it, doesn't make you different or less important. Never let anyone make you you feel inferior. You're a smart girl. Don't forget that. "Eleonor nodded.

"Promise me." I practically had tears in my eyes, to think that Ivan did not even consider his daughter with a minimum of respect "Promise me that you will never let anyone shoot you." "I promise." Said Eléonore firmly, determined not to disappoint me despite her young age. I wiped away the last tears that were on the little redhead's face. "There you are, my pretty brave girl."

Eleanor calmed down for a moment and then looked at me with her gaze which meant that she still had questions to ask. "So why was he so mean to me?"

I placed my hand on his red head and placed it closer to my chest. “People can be very cruel, my love. They will say things to hurt you, but words are sometimes useless. They will only hurt you if you let them do it. Your father is no different from these people I'm talking about, the only difference is that he can be as violent physically as he is by words. "

I sighed, bringing her into the bathroom to remove all the blood stained by her. "We're going to wash the blood off and then go to bed to have dark dreams."

"No, mom. I don't want to go to bed while you're with me again" Eleanor retorted as she squirmed in my arms but couldn't get away so easily. She was going to take a bath and then sleep whether she liked it or not.

I let the water fall from the bowl onto Eleanor's head while she closed her eyes tightly so as not to receivesome water in it. "Look at all this hair, it will take hours to untangle it."

Eleonor babbled for herself while playing with her bath toys; by pulling the rubber duck underwater and letting it rise. I grabbed some of the shampoo and started to send it into Eleonor's hair, "Close your eyes, darling." I let the water fall on her by washing the shampoo again. Eleanor closed her eyes and held her breath until it was all over.

"More than getting dressed and in bed." I exclaimed as I finished and wrapped Eleonor in a hot, dry towel, and pulled her up and out of the tub which would drain. I let the water run out of the tub and took Eleanor to her room where I dried and changed her.

Eleanor fell asleep as soon as her head hit the soft pillow on the bed and slipped under the covers. I looked at her. Eleanor began to look more and more like her father day by day. But of course, she looked more like me than Ivan, it was my certified copy. She just had Ivan's Persian eyes that made me tremble with fear.

But the child was always beautiful in my eyes, that does not make my love for her less strong. Her parents' sins were not hers, and she was not to suffer for ours. I sighed and pulled the blanket up to Eleanor's neck. "Good night Sweetheart." I leaned in, gently kissing the child's temple. I turned off the bedside light and left the room to go to the bathroom too.

I opened the hot water from the shower and slipped under it, the water making the blood disappear from my body. I looked down at the floor, watching the blood mix with the water to turn a pinkish liquid with a sickening smell. The feeling of life leaving you cannot be compared to any other feeling, it is a feeling of liberation and anguish.

Still soaked by my shower, I got out of the shower, a towel around my chest. I walked over to the mirror. I started to unravel the fabric on his arms which I had put shortly before my shower to stop the blood, they itched and made my arms stiff and sweaty.

I had not looked closely at the wound on his arm when I had made the bandages, I removed that of the right arm before that of the left, when the bloody wraps were thrown on the sink, I finally looked at the cuts on my arms.  
When I saw it, it took me a while to realize what it was, a symbol? No, words or a word, I put my arm closer to the mirror so that I could clearly read a "Traitor" or "Weak" or a rude name surely written on my arm. Then I deciphered it, 'Unloved' my heart gave an unwanted twinge. This word could trigger many memories but the one I replayed in my mind was by far the worst.

———————————————————————————————————————

Academy of invisible arts, 1920, a few weeks before Zelda's departure

I practically ran down the halls of the academy to Faustus' private apartments, I had to apologize for my behavior. We had quarreled over my place in the coven, he thought I couldn’t pretend to be the high priest and our argument ended in a fight and words that I regret were spoken. I was about to burst in when my brother Edward stood between me and the door and said, "Zelda, Faustus is busy right now. Your presence will only make him angry so go away"

"He won't mind when he hears what I have to say to him!" I exclaimed harshly. "Zelda, he's busy I told you." Edward looked furious at my persistence. "I'll tell her what you want. But go away !" "What's wrong ?!" I was getting impatient now, Edward could be such a despot when he wanted to. "He has an important visitor. This meeting can determine a lot for his future and for his future marriage." Edward retorted.

"Well, he'll have to apologize so I can ..." Then it struck me and I practically tripped back, this so-called visitor was no ordinary person. Just as I had feared, Faustus had apparently lost interest in me. "Let me enter." I cry in a strangled voice.

" However you want . Edward nodded and let me pass, I entered to see Faustus in a loving embrace with his "guest" Constance. I cleared my throat and they parted, both blushing and embarrassed to be caught. I held back my tears which stung the corner of my eyes. "What is the meaning of this ?!"

"Z ... Zelda us ... it was an accident." Faustus had stuttered as Constance grabbed a sheet to cover her naked body. "Yes, I can see that." I hissed. "She ... I mean, we were doing it ... I ..." "You've had enough of me so you found a new toy." "No!" He panicked.

"Don’t deny it, Faustus, you’re tired of me being a woman who has the guts to stand up to you , I'm not as fun as I used before so you went to see your good friend CONSTANCE!" I spat out his name like acid on my mouth. "No Zelda you don't understand!"

"I understand very well thank you! I am your best friend, your soul mate, your crime partner, your equal. I am not just an ornament that you can get rid of if you no longer find it to your taste, I am more . Well, let me say this, I don't care about your Constance or someone else sleeping with you, but never, I repeat, NEVER think of me more than a member of now coven. " Tears were running down my face now.

"I knew it was only a matter of time, maybe I just thought a little more or that you really enjoyed my company ..." I looked him straight in the eye. "I came here with an intention this evening, not to interrupt your adventure or to overwhelm you with my sorrows but to tell you that I am sorry for our last argument and for what I said! Not that you are leaving worry or maybe if all goes well, I can look at you again without wanting to throw up. "I turned on my heel and rushed to the door but before I left, I managed to stifle one:" I loved you Faustus but never again ... "

Faustus had just stood there, said nothing to keep me close and stood there, seemingly unchanged. He didn't stop me from leaving, didn't come to make amends later, and from there, he treated me like nothing more than an unimportant coven witch. Constance's face always reminded me that I was no longer hers, that I was nothing.

———————————————————————————————————————

I break the link with my memories and come back to the present, realizing that tears are running down my cheeks now. I made no attempt to stop them as I looked at my other arm, 'Heartless' I shook my head. Fucking memories.

———————————————————————————————————————

Academy of invisible arts, 1920, a few days before Zelda's departure

Faustus slammed me violently against the stone wall of his apartment and I felt my spine crackle in pain. He tackled my hands over my head and locked those blue eyes on my greens. "Zelda is too much stuffing!" I gave her a dark look. "Oh what did I do this time?!"

"You know exactly what you have done. You are flirting with practically all the men in this Academy! I know that our relationship is no longer what it used to be but you can at least have a little to consider by pretending that we we still appreciate it! "

"Oh, pretend to love you like before ?!" I screamed back. He laughed coldly on my face, his alcoholic breath burning me. "You’ve never had a feeling about me, you’re too self-absorbed."

My heart was dead at that moment, tears came to my eyes and I closed them so that they disappeared as quickly as it arrived. "I'll do what you want Faustus because anyway, I'm leaving soon but don't you ever think that I didn't have a feeling for you, because in that sort of thing, you're wrong."

I slipped out of his grip and walked past him out of these rooms, not sparing him a glance as I looked back would mean he had some hope left and no.

Again, he hadn't stopped me, not even affected by it but of course, I expected it. I knew I had no sense for him, just as he no longer made sense for me, my heart had cooled from that moment when he hadn't even tried to pretend anymore.

———————————————————————————————————————

I let out a sob before sinking to the ground and lying against the wall, face in hands, I was crying. These scars would be an eternal reminder of that night, of Faustus' betrayal, of my pain. My heart wanted to break again, burying my face in my trembling hands, I cried and cried and cried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave a kudos if you like the story and a comment. I am also very happy that you are still here to read my book so thank you ❤️


	15. Liars are the devil's children

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seeing a familiar face again in the midst of a crowd of strangers is reassuring and heartwarming, but sometimes the face can be familiar, but it brings demons from the past that were believed to be buried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made you wait and I'm sorry but I come back with some good news like Faustus is back and also a POV of Sabrina because it's been a long time. Good reading ❤️

Silence reigned in the dark room, our desperate faces not even meeting so much the sight of memories of Aunt Zelda affect us.

"How long have we been waiting for the next memory, Prudence?" Prudence glanced at the watch on her wrist and frowned at not seeing the hands produce the famous infernal ticking. She tapped her finger on the frame of her watch and groaned when nothing happened.

“Time doesn't seem to exist here anymore. And I really don't know how long we've been waiting, Nick.” And the silence resumed again. Only the sound of our breathing could be heard.

“I'm wondering something.” I say to break the silence. All faces turned to me and I continued with my guess. “We still don't know why Ivan is so obsessed with Aunt Zee. I mean, Aunt Zelda is a very beautiful woman, there's no denying it, but she's so ... so different from the person we love and appreciate. I cannot understand why you want to be close to someone who has such an unhealthy aura that they cause death and misfortune in their path. "

"Coz, know that love can't be explained. As rare as it is among wizards, it can lead to thoughtless and foolish actions as evidenced by Ivan's behavior towards our aunt.” He explains, his arms crossed under those armpits and his serious gaze hugging those features. Nick got up from his sitting position and moved closer to me, until he entered the circle we had formed as we sat down.

From the start, he had stayed away. As if embarrassed by something he saw or a secret he will keep.

"Have you ever noticed the attraction that everyone who passes Professor Spellman feels.” I looked at him curiously. But what was he talking about? But I can see that Prudence and Ambrose don't seem entirely surprised at what he is stepping forward.

“Apart from her great beauty, there remains some form of unexpected attraction to her. Haven't you noticed how she haunts your thoughts, we almost lose interest in the rest when her name is spoken or how madness takes hold of us every time we watch her for a long time. I can tell you one thing, either Professor Spellman is not a full-fledged witch or she is cursed. "

————————————————————————————————————————

New Orleans, Hathaway Bar, 1930

Grace was already at the front door of the club, smoking a cigarette during the short break granted to her. She looked confused when she saw him, approaching her slowly. "Do you need help, sir?"

"Yes." He handed her a fifty bill, which she accepted somewhat hesitantly. "I wonder if I could talk to Phiona before she plays?" Grace didn't respond immediately, too frightened by the man's cold blue eyes. Although he was very handsome, his attitude was bloodcurdling and the rabbit-headed cane didn't help those in front of him not to squirm in fright.  
“She's not here tonight. I'm sorry, sir ”

"Are you sure?" He frowned, "It's strange, isn't it?" Grace leaned towards him to better speak to him between the noise of passers-by and of cars which hampered their discussion.

“She called me this afternoon saying she wasn't feeling so good. She will be back next Saturday. She needs a few days apparently. And she also told me that you tried to get to her on the phone and even see her several times. A little suspicious if you ask me. "

"I assure you I did not harm Phiona. We are old friends and I am here to have her come home with me. He explained disdainfully to the waitress.

"I see." Grace leaned back until her back made contact with the brick wall behind her. “The last time Phiona took a few days off she had to treat a black eye and a burst lip due to a man harassing her, just like you. So excuse me for not trusting you, sir. "

Faustus huffed in annoyance before regaining his composure. "I would never hurt her, we've been friends since childhood and it's time for her to stop this nonsense and return to the life that suits her rank."

Grace drew on her long cigarette then exhaled the smoke before speaking. "What you say doesn't make sense. You don't seem like a normal person to me. I don't know what your history is with her, but you are determined to talk to her and I don't know if it is good or bad. "

He turned back to the street, determined to leave now. "I'm going to visit her in her apartment then."

"She doesn't want to see you." Grace called him. "She told me to tell you if I saw you that it would be in your best interests to forget about her and move on." You must really forget about her. "

The week passed painfully slowly and Saturday night did not improve things at all.

"Didn't I tell you last week that it would be in your best interests to move on?" Grace asked seeing Faustus about to enter the club.

"I don't intend to leave here without seeing Phiona tonight." Faustus insisted, still with his disdainful tone. He was tired of Grace's maneuvers to get him to give up.

There were a crowd of people behind him waiting to enter. Everyone in town had come for Phiona's return, without her the evenings were more gloomy. Grace raised her eyebrows and shook her head. "Guess I can't talk you out of it?"

"Absolutely." He put his dollar to pay for his entrance to the club in her hand.

"Well." She motioned for a burly man against the wall to replace her at the door. “In that case, come with me. We have a special place reserved for you tonight. At the request of Phiona. "

Faustus was surprised. Zelda had then anticipated his return. And if she had reserved a seat for him, maybe that meant she wanted to see him or at least you allowed her to approach her closer. He followed Grace to a table in front and in the center of the room. There was a lonely chair overturned on it and a tag written "Faustus Blackwood". She put the chair briskly on the floor next to the table and gestured invitingly to tell him to sit down.

“Sit down, sir.” She gave him a smile, something almost sympathetic in her feelings, placed a bottle of bourbon on the table in front of him with a drink. "You'll want something a little hard tonight. Enjoy the show."

He watched Grace leave and wait patiently by the bar for the drinks to be brought to the customer. Tables were filling up around him. The club was a wall of people patiently waiting for it to come. The musicians were numerous on the large stage, tuning in loudly. There were choir singers in little black dresses, their matching headdresses, warming their voices along with the musicians tuning their instruments. The lights dimmed and almost went out, you could no longer clearly see the surroundings. The crowd whispered silently, curious about who is proceed in secret. The musicians calmed down with the choristers. A snap of stiletto heels was heard, and the pianist began to play softly . When the spotlight shifted to Zelda, him breath caught in him throat.

I should have known

I’d leave alone

Just goes to show

That the blood you bleed is just the blood you owe

From head to toe, she was covered in black satin. A flared dress and something different in her attitude. Her red curls were barely showing as they were in a strict bun, two locks protruding from her hairstyle to framed her face in a charming way. She remained motionless like a statue in the center of the stage. It wasn't Zelda or Phiona standing there but a scared child.

We were a pair

But I saw you there

Too much to bear

You were my life, but life is far away from fair

Was I stupid to love you?

Was I reckless to help?

Was it obvious to everybody else?

Faustus's eyes met Zelda's. They were hard green eyes staring at him. There was no smirk or flirtatious smile that illuminated them with that spark of life. They reflected the black of her robe, swirls of threatening ink that would sweep over him. Something froze in his chest.

That I’d fallen for a lie

You were never on my side

Fool me once, fool me twice

Are you death or paradise?

Now you’ll never see me cry

There’s just no time to die

When she finally moved, started rocking to the song sensually, he understood what was waiting for him. A revenge he wasn’t able to counter.

I let it burn

You’re no longer my concern, mmm

Faces from my past return

Another lesson yet to learn

Zelda's emerald green eyes closed as she got deeper into the song, Faustus felt a bit of a breather from not having those hateful eyes staring at him. He could not decipher this maneuver. Was she taunting him? Was she making him regret that he messed up by putting her aside? Oh how he regretted it every time the sun rises or sets.

That I’d fallen for a lie

You were never on my side

Fool me once, fool me twice

Are you death or paradise?

Now you’ll never see me cry

There’s just no time to die

He kept his gaze on her, not blinking for fear that she would disappear as usual.Carefully watched his expression remain so sorry. Her voice tonight was clear and strong, signifying sadness and pain in every note.

No time to die, mmm

No time to die, ooh

The group did not give time to take a break. To applause, they drifted smoothly to the next moving number.

I can't seem to focus

And you don’t seem to notice I’m not here

I’m just a mirror

You check your complexion

To find you reflection’s all alone

I had to go

There was no doubt in his mind that she was singing directly to him. Tears swelled in those eyes, threatening to run down her flushed cheeks, threatening to break his heart. If he could take her in his arms now, he would do so without hesitation. He was wiping away those tears that threaten to fall and will kiss her until the past doesn't matter anymore.

Can’t you hear me?

I’m not coming home

Do you understand?

I've changed my plans

Her voice was so rich in emotions. He felt goosebumps rise over his body. She looked at the sky when she sang, as if looking at him had become too much. And he found himself staring at the bourbon on his table, hearing her words for the truths they were.

‘Cause I, I’m in love

With my future

Can’t wait to meet her

And I (I), I’m in love

But not with anybody else

Just wanna get know myself

She stood before him so suddenly now, took his chin in her hand and tilted his face to meet his ocean blue gaze. She smiled sadly as she watched him look at her with so much regret in those eyes.

I know supposedly I’m lonely now (Lonely now)

Know I’m supposed to be unhappy

Without someone (Someone)

But aren’t I someone? (Aren’t I someone? Yeah?)

Her fingers were shaking as she stroked his cheek, fingernails drifting just from his jaw. Her whole body was shaking, he noticed. As if the song in her was an entity to be delivered. As if she was possessed by every word she said.

I’d (I’d) like to be answer (Be your answer)

‘Cause you’re so handsome (You’re so handsome)

She opened his bottle of bourbon between those manicured fingers, poured herself a tall glass and drank it without taking the time to savor it. She sang as if her throat felt no burning. When she put the empty glass on the table, he hesitantly stroked her hand.

But I know better

Than to drive you home

‘Cause you’d invite me in

And I’d yours again

She turned away from his table, her black dress blazing, back to the stage where she pointed to him, passion blocking her position and it was Zelda. Singing with such vehemence, he could now hear the tears in her voice, see the pain in her tight gestures. He destroyed her and go paid it

But I (I), I’m in love (Love, love, love, love)

With my future

And you don’t know her

And I (I), I’m in love (Love, love)

But not with anybody else

I'll see you in couple years

He was glad the song was over. Glad the lights went out again. Glad that the simple piano still only plays a high repetition. He needed time. She hadn't forgotten those mistakes. He rubbed his face. How now? How would he help her now? The bourbon burned, but it needed the burn.

The lights remained dim. She stayed on stage. Arms crossed over her chest, protectively. But her eyes were still accused, still promised that the words she sang were true.

Don’t be that way

Fall apart twice a day

I just wish you could feel what you say

Show, never tell

But I know you too well

Got a mood that you wish you could sell

The crowd was mesmerized by her. There was such beauty in her truth. In her pain. And although each lyric told her to go away, to step back, Faustus only wanted to wrap her in his arms and sob with her. But he remained cold in the face of these charms.

If teardrops could be bottled

There'd be swimming pools filled by models

Told "a tight dress is what makes you a whore"

If "I love you" was a promise

Would you break it, if you're honest?

Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before

I don't wanna be you, anymore

The swell of the group allowed her the luxury of a deep breath. Looking away from him, she bit her lower lip.

Hand, hands getting cold

Losing feeling is getting old

Was I made from a broken mold?

Hurt, I can't shake

We've made every mistake

Only you know the way that I break

If teardrops could be bottled

There'd be swimming pools filled by models

Told "a tight dress is what makes you a whore"

If "I love you" was a promise

Would you break it, if you're honest?

Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before

I-I don't wanna be you

I don't wanna be you

I don't wanna be you, anymore

Back in the dark, a wave of overwhelming applause echoed through the bar. The spotlight has come back on and with them we reveal Zelda again. The still gloomy redhead picked up the microphone and began to speak in a pained voice although she was wearing a weak smile. “Thanks,” she said. "All of you. I am very touched to see you come from all over New Orleans to hear me sing. It warms my heart." She smiles her famous flirtatious smile. "I was thinking this week. You know when you're sick you think a lot more than usual?" Mumbles of agreement were heard among the audience. "I was wondering ... have you forgotten who you are? Or ... or maybe you loved someone so much that you lost yourself in that other person?" The mumbling resumed and then died down when she spoke again. "Or maybe that other person… is changing you. Irreparably. Destroy you so much that you want to forget your reality. ”

Faustus lowered his head, praying for the strength to listen, to hear her without speaking. " He change the way you dress, the things you believe in, the things you do, the way you make love." She laughed. "Maybe he even made you turn your back on your family? Or maybe you're here now, in this club listening to me talk about us. Wanting to make me come back to you. I want to reassure you tonight that I'm going to make you suffer and you know I'm very good at breaking hearts. "Zelda winked at Faustus." Well I'm still stuck because of this. And tonight, I want to remind all of you, and myself, I think, who I am. "She turned to her choristers and one of them stepped forward, opening the long zipper at the back of the flared black dress. The club darkened and he heard her whisper, "Time to wake them up over there."

It was the start of her revenge, music to make him understand who was in charge now, and obviously one of the audience's favorite songs. Dancers filled the floor, and he lost sight of Zelda for the time being. Faustus felt trapped at his table, and at the worst possible time.

You don't own me

I'm not just one of your many toys

You don't own me

Don't say I can't go with other boys

"Zelda." He said, his head in his hands. She will never forgive him. He looked up, rising from his chair, hoping to catch her eye again, needing to communicate with her. And he managed to see it. Frozen in his discovery: the almost transparent black corset.

And don't tell me what to do

Don't tell me what to say

And please, when I go out with you

Don't put me on display 'cause

It was no wonder the crowd became enraged. When he had first seen the corset, on her while he was in the brothel where she worked, he had been helpless not to want her in it. But those memories, couldn't remember what he saw on the stage. This reality of a woman whose body was so sensual, attractive, in the form of a demon. In his darkest dreams, Constance wore Zelda's corset. But she wore it like a little girl playing at dressing in the silk of that provocative vixen. No one wore it like Zelda.

You don't own me

Don't try to change me in any way

You don't own me

Don't tie me down 'cause I'd never stay

And she shamelessly displayed her attributes. Strutting around with those long shapely legs . Swaying those hips to the music. She slid the last piece of the dress off her body, as if she weren't naked enough already and with the dress to her feet, revealing the garters and just the lacy edges of what looked like black panties. She was a constant torture.

I'm young and I love to be young

I'm free and I love to be free

To live my life the way I want

To say and do whatever I please

And don't tell me what to do

Oh, don't tell me what to say

And please, when I go out with you

Don't put me on display

In the crowd, she was busy seducing every man in the room. Too busy to taunt him any closer. Faustus tensed however when he saw the men of the club looking at her with so much desire that it became unhealthy. And he was happy to see the bouncers come closer, keeping a close watch on every single person who approached her. And if he cared, he was angry with him more and more with the passing second. He resented her for showing off their relationship in front of a hundred strangers before he even spoke to him in confidence. To make their past a presentation. She was entitled to her anger, yes. But him too.

I don't tell you what to say

Oh, don't tell you what to do

So just let me be myself

That's all I ask of you

I'm young and I love to be young

I'm free and I love to be free

To live my life the way I want

She was sweaty, glistening in the spotlight. Zelda smiled for the first time since the start. It was almost a real smile of joy. "It was fun!" The smile faded when she met Faustus's eyes, but she ignored him. "How about we all sing together?" The crowd applauded. "When I come as a vengeful angel to take everything from you, I'll be dressed like this." She waved back with both hands. "Ready?"

Did you really think, I'd just forgive and forget, no

After catching you with her

Your blood should run cold, so cold

You, you two timing, cheap lying, wannabe

You're a fool, if you thought that I'd just let this go

I see red, red, oh red

A gun to your head, head, to your head

Now all I see is red, red, red

Did you really just say, she didn't mean anything, oh

I'll remember those words, when I come for your soul, your soul

She was furious, victorious in her rage. Her position and her strong arms at the microphone. If silk could be armor, it would be her.

Know that you, you dug your own grave, now lie in it

You're so cruel, but revenge is a dish best served cold

I see red, red, oh red

A gun to your head, head, to your head, oh

Executioner style, and there won't be no trial

Don't you know that you better off dead

All I see is red, red, oh red

Now all I see is

It was a war cry. The bar joined her in singing, reaching out to her as she stomped on the stage. She pointed to Faustus with her manicured finger and he knew then: he was her enemy.

Run, hide

Oh, you're so done

Better sleep with one eye open tonight

I see red, red, oh red, oh

A gun to your head, head, to your head, oh

Executioner style, and there won't be no trial

Don't you know that you better off dead

All I see is red, red, oh red

Now all I see is red, red

In the din between songs, he remembered how he remembered Zelda on the altar of the unholy church when he was closely associated with Constance. How he had wondered about his future without Zelda. The fate also of the woman he had passed in the streets of St Petersburg, a baby in her arms. How he had prayed blindly and furiously to see her again. How had her name been on his lips as he reached his climax of his pleasure in the arms of other women.

Drag me to death, like a lit cigarette

Took my last breath, like the smoke from my lips

I've lied for you, and I liked it too

But my knees are bruised, from kneelin 'to you

I've had enough, but you're too hard to quit

We've had our fun, now your sugar makes me sick

I've lied for you, and I liked it too

But my makeup's ruined

And now, in a crowded New Orleans bar, her self-proclaimed devil walked over to histable, microphone a gun, and suddenly she was kneeling on his table, singing him the song of her revenge. He didn't hide the anger on his face, but she didn't seem intimidated by it.

And now I'm laughin 'through my tears

I'm cryin 'through my fear

But baby, if I had to choose

The joke's on you

The joke's on you

Her backup singers, her army, synchronized perfectly, looking at him accusingly while continuing to sing. It was as if all the eyes in the bar were on his ashamed face. Let them watch my taste of revenge then, she thought. Zelda stood on Faustus's table, continuing to sway sensually as she looked down on him.

God knows I've tried to be kind

But I will just lay down and die

Wearin 'a fake smile

The joke's on you

But even in her hatred, her righteous and furious anger, she was a goddess. Her body created by Satan to be sin incarnate, those two long legs with those thighs that make him burn. And he looked at the work of Satan with despair.

My heart's gone bad, now it won't beat for you

You had your laugh, now I won't play the fool

I've lied for you, and I liked it too

But I'm black and blue, from bleedin 'for you

You strike the match, burn me out so fast

Look what we had, now it's turned to ash

I've lied for you, and I liked it too

But my makeup's ruined

It was true, after all. Faustus had used her very love, her very worship of him, against her. Every manipulation, every glorious empty promise that had told him. He had left her to the dirty work and abandoned her when he himself had been manipulated by the redhead he loved. He hadn't deserved it, then. He didn't deserve her now. He never would.

And now I'm laughin 'through my tears

I'm cryin 'through my fear

But baby, if I had to choose

The joke's on you

The joke's on you

Back on her knees, she leaned close to his face. In any other world, it was an invitation to a kiss. In this one, it was a searing threat. Zelda took his hand in hers and placed it on her chest. She was sticky with sweat. Faustus could feel her heart pounding in her chest, the reverberation of her voice incredibly deep in her throat.

God knows I've tried to be kind

But I will just lay down and die

Wearin 'a fake smile

The joke's on you

On the last beat of the song, she whirled off her table so quickly that her hand remained where her heart had been. She grabbed the bourbon bottle with her. And she was gone in the dark of the bar.

There would be no reminder tonight, not a hint of hope to hear her soft voice ring with anger again. At least not on the stage. The group began to play a frenzied swing to continue the momentum the redhead had created from the first notes she spoke.

Standing, Faustus looked for the slightest sign of red hair escaping his person. And he saw Zelda's red locks disappear from the scene up a staircase to the left and he followed, pushing the dancers with determined force. Down a dark staircase he found himself in a dark hallway and calm reigned for a moment. A door slammed and he rushed towards her as if it was the last thing to save him from the darkness. When a female figure well-known for putting sticks in his wheels appeared between him and the door.

“She warned you. And if you know her so well, you know she is particularly resentful.” Faustus closed his eyes in annoyance before opening them again to see Grace, her arms crossed and her stern little look stuck to her face.

“Grace. Always trying to put me stick in the wheels. Aren't you tired of keeping me from talking to her when you know I would end up doing it?” The waitress smiled softly at him at those words that were not so meaningless.

"Don't go talk to her. You don't want to see her knowing what she will have for you if you walk through that door. Trust me."

“I have to see her !!” He shouted against the young woman who trembled slightly at the sound of his voice so harsh. He hadn't quite managed to control his emotions and knew he was a hell of a mess.

"What's your story?" Grace asked after taking these spirits back. "Why the fuck are you here, sir? Phiona is fragile now more than ever. The last fucking thing she needs is some ass from the past coming to ..... "

“I am well aware of what I have done to her in the past.” Firmly, but delicately, he took Grace's wrist and forced her to listen intently. "You don't know about her or her past, Grace. I assure you that what I shared with Phiona haunted me as much as it haunted her all these years. But if I miss this opportunity to right my wrongs, I am doomed to live with all my life and she is too. "

Grace searched her face, torn by the truth of her situation. “You care about her. You are a good friend to her, a person who helps her not to sink like before. Thank you for that. I also thank her for still being alive while I have found her in more than one situation where death lurked in all directions. I ask that you allow me to see her now. If she murders me, if you were to help her dispose of my mutilated corpse in the twilight of dawn, it would not only be deserved but it was worth it for me to have that moment with her right now. "

Grace's eyebrows rose. She weighed her words and found them worthy on the spot. "Good." She walked past him, stopping at a door at the end of the hall, the doorknob in hand. "But remember this: I have a dagger in my boots. And I'll use it to kill you myself even if you hurt her." She held out her hand, motioning for him to wait and knocked on the door "Phiona darling".

"I don't want to see him, Grace."

“Let me in, Phiona. Please, my dear. "

"Just you then?"

Grace smiled at Zelda's childishness. "Of course, just me, you kid."

The door opened and Grace slipped inside Zelda's dressing room. Faustus leaned against the wall near the door, praying with all his might to the Dark Lords to make Zelda me stubborn not to see him. The minutes passed which looked like hours. The dead calm in the hallways and that wouldn't do any good according to Faustus. When the door opened, he stood up quickly, waiting for Grace to say a word or make a sign.

Grace's face didn't betray anything for long seconds and then she looked him in the face, "Ten minutes," she said. "And I'll get a body bag. Just in case it goes wrong." She motioned to him inside.

He didn't see Zelda as he entered the dressing room, just a dressing table dotted with cosmetics, dresses lying on the sofa, and bunch of flowers all over the room. He heard water from the shower running in the en-suite bathroom and swallowed heavily, thinking she was naked not far from him. How could he seriously talk to her then? She stormed out of the bathroom. “Zelda. "

“Sister Spellman.” Her voice was hoarse. Hatred, emotion, naked pain on her beautiful face, dangerously sported. "Isn't that what you called me? After wiping Zelda from your heart and your life forever?"

"Zelda, please…"

“I love when you beg me it's divine sound to my ears.” She was still half dressed, still in that damn black corset, she was intimidating as hell. “Please. J 'would love to hear more pleas from you. "A sad, hateful laugh escaped her and she became more and more threatening the more time passed." I certainly hoped for a whole decade to hear you say those words. . Pray that you will be by my side again. For what?" Anger bled in each of those words. She roughed up the bottle of bourbon she had stolen from her instead, pouring herself a drink.

“I can't believe you.” She turned away from him, but he could see her reflection in his dressing table mirror. He couldn't separate the sadness from the anger. "What are you doing here? Huh? Take all my skeletons out of my closet? Haven't you done enough damage in my life? Is there a part of me that you don't want destroy? Don't worry about the part of me that was left has already been destroyed by another. "

"Zelda. I'm here for you, for ...."

"For me ?" Now she turned, those green eyes wide open on him. She pointed to it, bourbon bubbling. "You should have been dead a long time ago to get you done to me, Brother Blackwood.” Faustus's heart withered when he heard him called that.

"I don't disagree with you."

"Don't fucking manipulate me again, you dumb asshole!" She was facing him, looking him in the eye. "I could kill you right away. Tortured you until you begged me to finally kill you." But her eyes were so wet, threatening to fill with tears at any moment.

"I can't make you forget what I did to you."

"Absolutely !"

"But my only chance is to try, Zelda. Give me another chance to be a part of your life."

"Oh, My life…" Tears flowed seriously. He wanted to touch her, to hold her, to comfort her. But it would be a sure disaster. She pressed the cool glass to her forehead to cool herself. "Tell me that one day it will all be over and I will be a little bit at peace."

"I can assure you."

Zelda's lips curved into a sad smile. "I do not think so." But it was short-lived and his hatred resurfaced. “I left it all behind, you know. You. Greendale. All that fucking pain I felt when I was there even though the pain is persistent and different now. I wanted a new life and I got it.” She drained the bourbon, winced at the burn from the alcohol. "And now you. Fuck you. You come here and -"

“Zelda.” He took his chance. He put his hands on those shoulders and looked at their reflections in the mirror. "What do you want in this place? What are you looking for here?"

"I had what I was looking for!" She was yelling at him now, not trying to control. “I was Zelda Spellman again in a way! This! Strong and singing and alive as I chose! Drink as I wanted and as much as I wanted. Do whatever I wanted without thinking about the repercussions. Sleep with everyone I liked... "

"It's an empty and sad life, Zelda!" He raised his voice, ready to fight fire with fire. "You can hardly afford to eat if nobody subsidizes your needs! You offered your body to me in this brothel the last time I saw you in Zelda Spellman!"

"I gave you more than my body once!" Raising my voice had been a mistake. She raised hers higher. "I gave you my fucking soul, Faustus Blackwood! My blind trust! I would have followed you anywhere, do whatever you asked. I sacrificed more of my dignity for you in the service of your interest more than I sacrificed to any man in the service of my survival! "

"And I used you like everyone you sleep with in the brothel!" He recognized, the warmth in his face, his neck. Throat thick with helpless tears. "I took advantage of it, Zelda! I used you worse than them! I lied! I handled! I destroyed you! I know what I did! Don't think for one moment that I also forgot how you chose to make me one of your victims!” Frantic, he rolled up the sleeve of his left arm, showed her his arm tattooed with those initials. Z S, written in beautiful calligraphy and a little phrase below. "To my toxic other half whom I managed to fall victim to. I love you "

"It's you doing this to me. Sinking into my blood and my system to slip into it forever. Without you, I go mad with anger. Your very presence comforts me and calms my fears." He laughed sadistically, couldn't resist the sudden insane madness that was taking hold of him. "You haunted me like no one has ever been able to."

She looked at his arm, tracing the ink lines with her index finger. Tears were still streaming down her face. Hesitantly, he reached out his hand to her face and stroked her cheek as his soul perverted at its touch. “Zelda. I was a selfish man who broke a woman that I…” The words hurt. They were there but they did not want to come. He forced them. "A woman I may have loved."

It was his turn to laugh sadistically, "You only loved yourself."

“I saw this too late, Zelda. But in the meantime, you were already inked in every part of me. "

"Too late." She whispered. "What now? I forgive you and you go back to your comfortable life with your wife?"

"I'm here because I need you. I don't care about Constance." It was hard for Faustus to admit his addiction to this woman.

"Need me? Oh, it's almost touching. Need me in what? More dirty work? More lies I can tell ?More secrets? More murder so you can have the power?"

"I would no longer ask you to do the dirty work on my behalf. "

"Perhaps. But I don't trust you. "

He ignored comment on her confidence in him. Nothing would be like it was before he left and their argument. "No lies. Only truths now. I'm here for you."

"I do not need you."

He smirked sadly, looking away from her for a moment. But his mind screamed to see her again as soon as possible . "I noticed, you never really needed me and anyone else."

"Get up."

He started to panic, walked over to her form and hugged her, "Listen to me."

She pulled away from his embrace although he still held her by the forearms. Preventing him from going away from her. "I listened to you. Now, go. Ten minutes are long gone." She went to sit in the dressing table and began to comb through those red curls.

He grabs the arms of her chair, trapping her. She was at his mercy again and her anger was rising, darkening those beautiful features. "One last thing."

She looked down at her hands near her hips, holding her captive. "Are you going to take drugs again until you die?" Her face burned it and she laughed darkly. "Damn it, if I weren't so stoned in Paris ... I'd slit your throat in that torture chamber."

“Zelda. "

"But you liked touching me, didn't you?" Her leg moved, slid to the side. She leaned towards him, her faces only inches from him. "Why didn't you fuck me this tonight in Paris? You could have. Like I told you, I was too stoned and drunk and that was my job after all. You could have satisfied all your sinful fantasies with me. " At his surprised look, she nodded. "You still want me, all your sexual tension hasn't been calmed."

"Let me prove myself." He dropped his hands, releasing her. “Let me show you my feelings for you, Zelda. "

She cupped his jaw. Ready sealed their lips with a simple movement. "What ? love? "

"Yes."

The cupped hand suddenly pushed her face away from hers. He stumbled backward and she dyed over him. "You are not capable of this." She opened her door. "And it doesn't exist anyway. Grace!"

He heard footsteps in the hallway. Unsteadily rose to his feet. Grace appeared in the doorway, looking a little sympathetic. “We ended up here. It was really the worst thing in the world to see you again. "

He then disappeared down the dark corridor, under the watchful and sad eyes of the one he had destroyed years ago.

In his bed that night, alone, he thought of Zelda . He wondered if she remembered the days when they were one. Looking at his tattoo, he thought of his fantasies of the anti-pope seat. How he had imagined Zelda as his beloved wife, his right hand. He had fucked Zelda in his fantasies for all these years without her, detected paralyzed with her desire because it was safe in his mind. False and ungodly but sure and exquisite. The idea of a woman so adoring, so idolatrous that she presents him with total ownership of her beautiful body. Together they have sinful secrets, fantasies of lust as divine as the intelligent redhead mind.

He had known her desire since their first meeting. He had seen it burn in his green eyes every day. He had bathed in those flames, wondering if his fantasies were as sordid and bloody as his. Until the day their fantasies came true.

He failed to love her during their year at the Academy, it was impossible. He had known love only for himself. And Satan. He had confused love with need too late. When he needed Zelda, she was always there, somewhere in his brain. He remembered the feel of her soft hands tracing the patterns of these tattoos across his chest. The worship was gone in her dead eyes now, but something lingered, forcing her to have a constant attraction to him.

He remembered the day she had come to hate him. Pure venom in his tone. The madness on her face that hardly unembellished her. She was so furious that you could feel the ground vibrate beneath you and the weather drastically changing. And just in that anger, she managed to say a phrase that will mark him forever. “I now see us as we really are. Monsters devoid of conscience.” She said.

He didn't understand until he was lying in his bed, his new wife sleeping next to him. He knew precisely what awaited him, it turned out that these acts treacherous for his taste for power would henceforth be frowned upon by all. He would be revealed as the murderer, liar, and crook that he was and his heart broke when he discovered that without Zelda he was on his own.

He knew his love for her would take precedence over his sanity. But now ... he was there to recover her at all costs. With an opportunity to heal himself and to heal a woman who made him her puppet in so many ways. To apologize and right his many wrongs. To have one more chance.

He fell asleep in his empty bed and dreamed of her in his study, reading many books to deepen this knowledge, smiling when he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind for him stealing a kiss and explaining his new machiavellian plans to her .

Those memories of her and those fantasies were the one thing that wasn't somehow destroyed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A whole POV for this chapter but I will surely come back to the next chapter of Zelda. Don't forget to leave a kudos and a comment, it's always nice ❤️


	16. Nightmares are reflections of our soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the darkness comes to haunt you and destroy you from within, you always take refuge in the nearest source of light even though that may be worse than evil but at least you know your surroundings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to tell you that I will always release chapters but not regularly because I don't have too much time at the moment but I am not giving up on you. Good reading even if the chapter is a bit short I think ❤️

Zelda's apartment, New Orleans, 1930

My screams and moans echoed between the four walls of my room. I awoke in a scared gasp, sweat beading all over my body only covered by my thin black lace nightie. I scanned the surroundings, like a wounded animal preparing to be attacked from all sides, the shadows, the hiss of the wind outside and the scent of a parfum I know too well put me on alert.

I caught my breath with difficulty and swallowed as the memories of my nightmare began to cloud my mind again, drowning me in a sea of fear and bitterness. I could almost feel him creep into my system and steer me like a wooden puppet. His phantom touch on my shoulder, his hands tightening around my swaist and those fingers tracing the contours of my jaw. This sensation gave me an unpleasant chill and goosebumps settled on my delicate skin.

And as I let out a shaking breath that I didn't even know I was holding, a cloud of white mist escaped my mouth as if I was outside on a cold winter night. My body shivered with cold and no matter if I covered myself with a blanket to chase the cold out of my body, I still felt that icy breeze sensation that one could have in St. Petersburg.

Knocks on the window made me jump and I turned to see the window shattering into pieces, the bits of glass landing on the floor and on my bed. The radio suddenly turned on and I immediately recognized the music it was playing. Be my baby.

The night we met I knew I needed you so  


And if I had the chance I'd never let you go  


So won't you say you love me  


I'll make you so proud of me  


We'll make 'em turn their heads  


Every place we go  


So won't you please

This song was the one that resonated almost all the time in the nightclub Le Sphinx in Paris before it burned down and which resounded thereafter in my home in Saint Petersburg. This song was for Ivan his declaration of love for me, I know that because he reminded me of it as he hit me.

(Be my be my baby) Be my little baby  


(I want it only say) Say you'll be my darling  


(Be my be my baby) Be my baby now  


(I want it only say) Ooh, ohh, ohh, oh

I covered my ears with my hands as the music grew louder and louder. I rocked back and forth, mentally telling myself that this is not real and that I am just hallucinating from start to finish.

I'll make you happy, baby  


Just wait and see  


For every kiss you give me  


I'll give you three  


Oh, since the day I saw you  


I have been waiting for you  


You know I will adore you  


Till eternity  


So won't you please

Screams and sobs left my mouth without my control over them. My mind ached and the room turned around me, I was in a daze, I was no longer in control of my mind and my movements. I found myself nailed to my bed strewn with bits of broken glass, I lay on my back, the glass slashing my skin like the devil's claws closing over me.

(Be my be my baby) Be my little baby  


(I want it only say) Say you'll be my darling  


(Be my be my baby) Be my baby now  


(I want it only say) Ooh, ohh, ohh, ohh, oh

A hand tightened around my neck, I instantly opened my eyes and felt the man's body high above me stick to mine as his face moved closer to mine.

"Did you miss me, my pet? “Those brown eyes stared at me, cold, stern and sadistic. I gasped for oxygen as he tightened his grip on my pale neck. "You will notice that now I will call you that because after all you are a bitch of the worst kind!"

“Fuck you Ivan!”

He chuckled darkly then traced my jaw with his rough finger. I try to turn my face as far away from him as possible but was quickly caught by his hand gripping my chin, forcing me to look at him.

“This is no way to greet her husband after he's been released from prison.” he said, his tone was deadly and I could tell I was going to have a hard time if I didn't calm down quickly. Yet my system retorted to get me out of there as quickly as possible even if I had to leave feathers there.

"I won't suffer anymore because of you, asshole! Get out of my fucking life! I just want to live normally! If you love me like you say let me be happy." I pleaded between my tears, but nothing and I mean nothing made him question himself. He remained the same, unchanged, remaining the man who frightened me.

"You don't understand, pet. If I can't have you then no one will just have you. "

————————————————————————————————————————

New Orleans, 1930

Faustus wouldn't have woken up so early without the knock on the door to his hotel room. He opened his eyes as his vision got used to the light in the room. Running a hand through his messy hair, he stood up to cover his bare chest with his shirt from the night before without bothering to button it completely.

He could feel the presence of a wizard on the other side of the door, his dark aura filling the place like a haze. As he opened the door, he came face to face with the person he was least likely to expect to see here and such an early morning.

"Grace." he sighed as he leaned on the doorframe. "What I did win for the pleasure of your visit?"

“Nice to see you too, Faustus.” She made no effort not to be sarcastic even though it was her who bothered him in the first place and she walked into the hotel room without permission. “I wake you up to yourself that I see ."

"No barely." He rolled his eyes, shutting the front door and then walked over to Grace without embarrassment. "What can I do for you?" He wondered what could have brought this guest. If Zelda was okay. Grace didn't seem particularly worried or panicked, which was a pretty good sign.

"I have a favor to ask of you." She laughs as she looks around. "Not that I trust you."

"Thank you." laughed Faustus in his turn. We couldn't have dreamed of a more unpleasant encounter. "Would you like to drink something? Vodka? Gin? Whiskey?"

"The coffee would be great, Faustus. Thanks." Grace walked into the small living room that had been set up not far from the drink bar where Faustus was pouring her a steaming cup of coffee.

He rummaged through the cupboards, finding everything he needed to make a martini. "I'm not offering you cream or sugar!" Grace rolled her eyes and then accepted the hot mug which did not fail to burn her slightly. Frowning at the sight of the man in front of her, she could only study him more closely. He appeared strong, harsh and severe and above all unresponsive as if nothing could reach him from his pedestal.

"A rough night, eh?

"I've known better."

Grace looked down, the guilt of those actions towards him finally overwhelming her. “I'm sorry for you, Faustus. I mean… I'm sorry for Phiona too, but… ”She struggled to finish her sentence, stumbling to find the right words without offending him. "Shit. You're both pretty confused, aren't you?"

He couldn't contain a sad smile. "Yes. I guess we are. Forced to live like this until death ensues."

"She didn't tell me, really." Grace took a sip of her tea which she had intensified with whiskey. "Just that you had a more than conflicted past relationship. You gave up on her. She said she left you behind her somehow."

"It looks like she did."

"I think it's rather chivalrous that you came just to get her out of this nameless hell."

He took a deep sip of his cocktail before pouring himself a glass of vodka now. "I'm sure she was moved." he said while containing his laughter. He sat down across from Grace and they were silent until Grace had the courage to speak.

"Faustus… Phiona is messy. I mean, she's always been, I don't know, messy, I guess. But last week she really lost her mind." Faustus' brow creased at the phrase. Zelda was not the kind of mentally unhinged person, maybe just an alcoholic, drugged, and angry. But nothing more. "I know you're not the person she loves the most. She keeps repeating how much she hates you with all her heart. That you're a piece of shit. Cowardly and lying like a dog and -"

"Yes, we established a long time ago that I was the worst bastard, thank you."

Grace smirked and thought to herself that this man must have heard worse than that from Phiona's mouth. "The point is, I'm starting to worry a lot about her. I've always done it, but now I'm asking myself a lot more questions than before. Yes, I understand that she's a bit in the bottle, but not all the time. She loves sex, but never chooses the right partners. And let's look at it for two minutes, she acts like a prostitute and spreads her legs at the first fool that crosses her path, right? "He couldn't think of it. that this dark time in his life had come to the surface and he began to wonder if even she could be saved. Could she?

"I know you need to know about her depression. She feels like crap ... way more than most people. I guess that's why she drinks sometimes. To ignore all the pain." You understand ?"

"Yes." Her head made him suffer the martyr just thinking of her sweet rose left alone in front of these demons.

Grace cleared her throat bringing him back to the present, away from those thoughts. "I um… I came here to see if you could help Phiona."

"She doesn't want my help. She made it clear."

"But would you mind? As if she would allow it, would you help her?"

“I would do anything for her. You don't even have a clue." And he hadn't known it, not really. Not before he said it out loud.

Grace sighed in satisfaction ready to finally tell him who made her run up to him. "Here is the situation, she is attacked in her apartment. The poor thing is made raped by her attacker who has not been identified. She cannot continue to live in her apartment and I cannot leave her alone during this difficult time. "

"She was raped!" Faustus cried out at the top of his lungs. His being was reduced to dust at this news. "And I wasn't there for her because I'm -"

"Faustus." He lifted the face he had buried in those hands and looked at the woman in front of him with a sorry look. "It had to fucking happen. Phiona has a ... reputation. A little." She suddenly grabbed his hand, wanting to reassure him. "But if you listen closely, half of what you hear is nonsense from men she rejected. I know Phiona. She doesn't act the way people claim. And sometimes these assholes just .. . try to take what they want by force. "

"I know." His stomach turned at the thought of a man touching her. She was his and only his. "Where is she now? If she's not at home ... "

“She's back at Hathaway. For the moment and with her daughter. "

"I'm sure she would rather live with you than with me so why not host her?"

"Oh, unfortunately I can't." She looked down at the floor, a hint of sadness in those eyes. "My husband, he would murder me if I brought Phiona to our apartment. So he might as well murder Phiona too." A nervous little laugh escaped the woman's throat but Faustus could see she wasn't kidding and she was almost unconsciously rubbing those wrists as if she wanted to soothe them with some pain. And he knowed, he knowed that this woman had to be beaten by her husband. Pity hit him.

"He thinks she's an ordinary Jezebel. He doesn't even like me working as a waitress on the nights she sings at the club."

"I see." Really did anyone have a good life in this world? Obviously not, he thought to himself, "I doubt she wants to stay here with me. Never. Under any circumstances."

"She might not have a choice." She leaned towards him. "I trust you. I, even Hathaway trust you. And that says a lot."

“She doesn't trust me and never will. "

"Trust him, then." Insisted Grace. But she saw the dark glint in the man's blue eyes and felt a strange feeling wash over her.

"He shouldn't be trusted unless you want to die under horrible circumstances." He sipped his drink thoughtfully.

"Look. Hathaway is a great guy. And he appreciates Phiona as his daughter too. She makes him a lot of money and that's sure to be one of those biggest assets. But she can't stay at the club. She'll drink the bar, relapsing into her addiction and is not a place for a child. I'm going to talk to her. She must realize that there is someone here who wants to help her and who can. "

"I wish you good luck." He tells her sarcastically, remembering that Zelda is worse than hell.

Grace studied him for a moment and finally decided to ask the questions that burned her tongue. "So what was she to you, Faustus? Your little demon?" He winced a little at the reminder of the nickname he'd given her. "Were you married to someone else or to something? Did you cheat on her? Whatever you did, it must have been epic."

It was such a long story. So much to say. And really, what good would it be to regurgitate it to Grace? He paraphrased. “Phiona was… in love with me, I guess. And I knew it. We… worked together. We were pretty good together, actually. A good team. And a pretty solid couple. "

"Where did you work?"

“In a Coven in Greendale. "

"Holy shit, for real? Phiona never told me she belonged to a Coven, she always said she was an orphan. What did you do there?"

"She ... was by my side as a support, she was doing everything to get me the post of High Priest and then Anti-Pope to leave afterwards."

"Was Phiona your right arm?" Grace smiles. "It's crazy. I thought powerful, wealthy families had control over this Coven, right?"

"Phiona was a very wealthy aristocrat when I first knew her. And I was from that social background too."

"Woah." Grace put her coffee aside. She raised her hands, placed her fingers on her temples, concentrating on taking in the new information. "Wait a second. Phiona ... was not an orphan."

"I knew her from Zelda, that's her birth name, but she changed it for some unknown reason. "

"This is all crazy to me, Faustus." She sighed heavily and closed her eyes before continuing. "Phiona or her real name Zelda was an aristocrat with the world at her feet. And you are an aristocrat, ... she was in love with you, it's not like if you couldn't marry her. "

“Yeah, I know our families hated each other and we were already engaged to different people. But I knew she had feelings for me. And I used those feelings to… manipulate her. used her. I'm a very ambitious man. I sought power and position in the church. And I saw Zelda as a tool to achieve it. "

"You were a real bastard."

"I still am, but not to her." She was everything to him and nothing will stop him in his desire to possess her. "Now I know without her the power seems less like it is only superficial-"

"Faustus". Grace stood up slowly, gathering these things and putting on her coat. "Prepare an extra bed for the child because I intend to bring her to you."

And on those, she slammed the door and left as quickly as she had arrived.

As Faustus took a sip of his vodka again, he was oblivious that a pair of prying ears was listening to him and that the owner of that ears was counting on owning its prize too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to say that Grace's comments about the viol are not my opinion. I just wanted these lyrics to fit the idea of the time so don't insult me. thank you for reading and leaving a kudos and a comment is always a pleasure ❤️


	17. It’s poison to love you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When we are at our lowest, we have to accept help from others because only they can put us back on the right path.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you had a good Christmas holiday and wish you a happy new year. So here is my little late Christmas present (even enormously) . Good reading ❤️

New Orleans, 1930

Faustus was lying in his hotel room, his eyes closed and his mind wandering to sweet dreams.

In his dream, Zelda was lying on his black satin bed in his manor in Greendale. She was smiling at him with her most charming smile and her green eyes had that sly glow that darkened them. Her red hair was arranged like a halo around her delicate face, giving her the appearance of an angel which contrasted sharply with her dark and sultry personality. Those arms rested lazily on either side of her head, tangling between the curls.

She was not wearing anything under the sheets that covered her nakedness. He knew this because his mind could make out the absence of clothing on her body at all times, he could trace every gentle curve from memory with his fingertips. Her skin was soft and supple, like in those memories.

Her bitten cherry-colored lip made him shake as he moved closer and closer to her body. The heat that escaped from it warmed his frozen soul. Their faces only an inch apart, their gaze locked on the other's and the other's breath caressing the skin. He stepped forward to seal the passion that overwhelmed them with a kiss. And-

Faustus was roused from his dream by knocking on his room door. He blinked, getting used to the light, ran a hand through that hair to shape it properly, and stood up stiffly from his bed in a crumpled shirt and his crumpled suit pants.

"Faustus! Wake up! It's Grace and Phiona."

Yes, he knew it was Grace. Who else knew he was in this hotel. He opened the door and saw her all smiles and without embarrassment as usual. "Look at you. You still seem asleep. Have I woken you up again?" She was wearing a workman's coat that covered her waitress outfit, which suggested she had just left the bar and had come straight to see him.

"Hello, Grace." His voice was hoarse and a little weak on the first words since waking up. Grace moved to the side to reveal her to those eyes for the first time since they had argued in her dressing room.  
"Zelda". His heart was in his throat as his brain now tries to take in the sight before it.

She looked a little dead at heart and the child in those arms rested her little red head on her shoulder blade as a cushion so that she could rest. Her hair, usually shiny, was a bit stringy, possibly dirty since she no longer lived at home. There was no make-up on her face which had taken on a grayish tinge probably from fatigue, and her eyes were puffy, red and slightly watery. She seemed to be crying ... for days without slackening. She was standing there in her dark green velvet dress and black trench coat, eyes downcast. The little girl snorted and that was what pulled Faustus out of the pitiful scene shown to him.

Faustus pulled out to the side to let the two women pass.

"Come in."

Grace was the first to step through the door, her smile never fell from her lips. "Thanks. Do you have a coffee?"

"I can do it."

Grace looked back, seeing that Zelda wasn't following her, she gave the redhead a meaningful look who thawed momentarily. "Come on, there is worse than here." Zelda laughed at her friend, unconvinced by her argument which she said didn't work. Nothing is worse than being around a man who can destroy you, she told to herself.

"Have you had breakfast, Faustus? Phiona has only eaten peanuts and sea bass pretzels for four days."

"My Satan!" Was it true? She looked rather weak, a little paler than he was used to. The man then understood that her situation was more than precarious.

"I'll ask reception to send us some omelets."  
"It's really nice of you." Grace hung her coat on the coat rack near the door while Zelda had gone to bed Eleonore in the bedroom adjoining the living room.

A few minutes later, we heard a knock on the door, a man on duty put the lunch tray fuller than expected.

The trio sit around a table, coffee and tea placed in front of each. A silence took place with the tinkling of spoons, knives and forks on the porcelain surfaces.

Faustus was sipping his tea, his gaze fixed on the redhead in front of him. When for the first time since arriving, Zelda spoke and gave him a look. Certainly empty, but at the very least, those eyes met hims.

"Thank you very much ... for hosting me. I promise you I won't be here long. Just get me back on my feet." Her voice was weak but hard and serious despite everything.

She looked so tired. He found that he preferred her strong and fiery, almost contemptuous to this oppressed figure that looked like a wounded animal.

"You are not a burden, Zelda." He wanted to touch her somehow, but didn't. He was too afraid that she would fly away any second. "Take your time here with me."

She was silent except for a virtually imperceptible whispered "thank you". Grace cleared her throat, chasing away the discomfort. "Phiona, I'll take your things in the car. What if Faustus is so chivalrous that he shows it, could he help me unload?"

Faustus sighed dramatically, reluctant to leave Zelda alone. "Of course."

They left Zelda sitting at the table, expressionless and calm. Outside the luxury hotel, the air was cool, freezing them to the bone. "She looks ... sick." He said while grabbing the many suitcases.

"She swallows her pride, Faustus. You know it's a great effort for her. Not to mention that she hasn't had a proper bed, bath or proper meal for days now. she was practically homeless until this morning. "

"I hate to see her that way."  
"Well, I guess that's where you do something about it." Grace was carrying a suitcase and a hat box. Inside, Zelda was crouched by the bed where her daughter was lying, repeating very complex protective spells.

They had to go out to get the last bags.

"Faustus. Try not to let her drink. She's had a dip recently, that's one of the reasons she's so lacking in expression. She's drunk. But… you shouldn't let her drink or take drugs."

"How do you handle it? Besides being immune to the misfortune of others, she is unchanged."

"Phiona… Phiona is not as hard as she looks. I know you know that, right? She's hungry for love. Real love. It's easy. to get fucked, Faustus. But it's hard to be loved by someone because love means opening up to that someone. It means it's easier to hurt yourself and I think that she will eventually die if we abandon her again. "

He nodded, fully understanding what she meant as he was going through this hellish dilemma.

"I'll leave. Say goodbye to Phiona for me." She smiled affectionately at him. "It will be fine ?"

He nodded. "We will be fine."  
"Phiona knows my number and she can call me by mirror anytime. I will write you my number anyway, in case she gets drunk. Which I don't want." She summoned a ballpoint pen, jotting down the numbers on a piece of paper, then handed him the paper.

"Call me if you need anything. She will do the same."

"Thanks, Grace." She winked at him, getting into his car.

He saw Grace drive off in the distance, mingling with the traffic among the other cars. Faustus returned to the hotel, stepped into the elevator, opening the door to his suite and found her sitting on a sofa, her gaze still blank. He had no idea what to say. And she looked so resigned and miserable that he hesitated to attempt any little speech that would surely hurt her, that would shut her in on herself again.

"I've put your things in the room your daughter occupies for now." He gestured towards the open room where Eleanor's sleeping figure was resting on the bed. “You can feel comfortable. You can sleep in the bedroom and I will sleep in the living room. Order whatever you like from reception, money is no problem. Uh…” He tried to think of anything else relevant to say to him in order to keep contact.

"Faustus."

"Yes ?"

"I wouldn't have come here if I had had another choice. Just being in your presence hurts me."

"I understand." His throat tightened at the words but he maintains a mask of calm.

"But I really appreciate your kindness. Without you I would probably be on the streets by now."

"I will do anything for you, you know that." He whispered, more to himself than to her.

"And I won't apologize." She continued firmly but you could detect a slight tremor in her voice, as if those words tore her from the inside. Destroying her heart to a thousand pieces even though there was almost nothing left now.

"For what I said at the bar, in the dressing room. I am still angry and I will be forever. I am beyond the anger with you, my being is ablaze with a feeling of revenge when I see you. And I think I'm entitled to that." He nodded, acknowledging that she was right, letting her pour out her pain and anger on him. She suddenly looked away, biting her lip, gently laughing at herself only to feel a hint of love for him anyway.

"But you know? My mother once told me, when I was just a child innocent of the misfortunes that will befall me, that Satan doesn't always answer our prayers as we expect and want. And I will confess that I have been praying lately. Pray hard for that he will give me what I want. "

He knew the feeling she was feeling. The feeling that praying could save you. "Why did you pray? If it's not too intrusive."

She looked directly at him for the first time since arriving; those teary green irises stare at him. “A solution to my torments. A way of letting go, a kind of inner peace. "Tears escaped her eyes. He hadn't even realized that she was crying.

"Because I won't be happy. I never will be until I find my peace. That's all I want, that's it. And my daughter's security, of course."

“We'll find a solution when we're in Greendale. Safe.” His fingers moved to touch her. To take her arms and suffocate her, to caress her sculpted cheeks streaked with tears.

She shrugged. Looking up at the ceiling to keep him from shedding more tears. “I chose to come here, you know? Because I didn't want to be alone in the same country as him . It was not good to be alone at his mercy. And now ... I feel more alone than before and unprotected. "

"But you are not alone, Zelda." Faustus didn't understand what she was talking about but he promised to question her about it. "I am here. However you might need or ... want my presence. Forgiven or not, I am eternally by your side. Grace is here and she cares very deeply for you."

She shook her head, turning away from him. "This is not what I mean." Her breath was short and those mental issues were slowly coming to the surface but she managed to push them away for the moment.

"So what do you mean?" He followed her a few steps behind her, she was back to him and was shaking violently. He couldn't see her face to gauge an emotion but could at least predict it was at its breaking point.

She looked out a front window, the rain beating down on the city and banging against the glass. "That we are all helpless in the face of him." He still didn't understand why and who she was talking about.

“Forget what I just said, this is none of your business.” When she finally looked back at him, her face over her shoulder, she was wearing a fake smile but he comforted Faustus anyway.

"May I use your bathroom ?"

"Yes." Apparently their discussion was over and she will probably never come back to the subject.

Zelda's shoulders relaxed, her spirits gradually calmed down. She tried to put on a brighter smile. "Thanks again."

Faustus gave her a sign indicating that she didn't have to thank him. Then he gestured for her to follow him. "The bathroom is over here."

"Not that you wouldn't have found it." Turn on the light in a room that was adjoining the bedroom, revealing a very luxurious marble bathroom that didn't surprise Zelda. Faustus was very tasteful after all.

"Not exactly a mysterious mansion we're used to from childhood, but it will do." Turn the light over in the bathroom. "The towels are there and I asked reception to bring you -"

"Did you know ?"

"Hm?" He stopped talking to find her in front of a low table with a large vase of red roses with a delicate fragrance.

"What am I supposed to know?"

"The red roses". She stroked the scarlet petals of the roses, mesmerized by their beauty. "These are my favorite flowers."

"I have to admit that I didn't know anything about it until now." But he could have burst out with the simple pleasure of making her happy somehow. She slipped in front of him to enter the bathroom.

"I'll let you do it ..." He gestured towards the bathroom. "If you need anything ..."  
She smiled slyly with her full lips, one eyebrow raised. "Like ... wash my back with a sponge?"

He was sure it amused him to torment him, see how close he was to no longer resist her. "I wanted to say..."

"I know what you meant." She leaned against the sink smiling smirk and knew she shouldn't be flirting with him but it was stronger than her sanity. She still wanted him and for all eternity, "I'll call you if I need your help."

"Do not be shy especially. I am at your disposal." He closed the bathroom door behind him, giving her privacy or rather giving himself limits so as not to succumb to temptation. He wasn't sure leaving her alone would be a good idea, his razor blade was within reach and she could spill her blood on the tiles in seconds.

In the living room, he took place on a sofa set up not far from the fireplace. The fire crackling in the hearth blackened by the centers of the wood slowly blazing to its ash state.

He heard the shower running and his mind wandered away from the book he was reading peacefully. Faustus caught himself imagining a naked woman under the water pouring out of the shower. Instead of reading on, he decided to occupy his mind while working because he had left the business of his company for a few days to find her.

No idea why but after hearing the sound of the shower, the water ran to run a bath. He couldn't help imagining her naked in the tub, covered only in soap bubbles. "May Satan help me resist her," he whispered to himself.

He scribbled the pages of the contracts with his fountain pen, studied the various papers and drank his glass of scotch between two check signatures. He was blowing the still-fresh ink of his letter when he heard it through the thin wall. Zelda was singing in her purest voice.

He barely heard her at first. It was so low that you had to strain your ears with the utmost attention to hear. Then the words whispered finally made sense.

Oh, you can't hear me cry

See my dreams all die

From where you're standing

On your own

It's so quiet here

And I feel so cold

This house no longer

Feels like home

Oh, when you told me you'd leave

I felt like I couldn't breath

My aching body fell to the floor

Then I called you at home

You said that you weren't alone

I should've known better

Now it hurts much more

He got up from his desk, walking slowly to the wall that separated him from her, rested his forehead against it and closed his eyes. He wanted to be closer to her voice somehow, he missed her so much even though she was right on the other side of the wall. The song echoed through the acoustics of the watery bathroom.

You caused my heart to bleed and

You still owe me a reason

I can't figure out why

Why I'm alone and freezing

While you're in the bed that she's in

I'm just left alone to cry

You caused my heart to bleed and

You still awe me a reason

I can't figure out why

You caused my heart to bleed and

You still awe me a reason

I can't figure out why

He heard the splash of water between the words and the tears that were felt in the voice which seemed heavier.

Oh, you can't hear me cry

See my dreams all die

From where you standing

On your own

It's so quiet here and I feel so cold

This house no lounger

Feels like home

The sound of water pouring out of the tub brought him out of his reverie. He stood up guilty, despite the fact that she would never know he was listening to her but now he couldn't doubt it. She was more destroyed than anyone on this earth and it was all partly his fault.

It took several more minutes before she got out of the bathroom. Faustus had worried on the couch, imagining all the worst possible scenarios in his mind, while watching a deadly horror movie on television.

Zelda easily sat down next to him, a couch cushion keeping a boundary between their two bodies. He didn't look at her at first, but felt her presence and the sofa bent slightly against its light weight. She was wearing black pants and a white epaulet shirt.

"What movie is this?" She asked without looking away from the screen.

"Murder of Alfred Hitchcock."

"Interesting". Suddenly there were her toes near his thigh. Near, there was no contact between their two bodies. She had bent her legs under her and continues to watch the movie, her elbow supporting her head and resting on the armrest of the black leather sofa.

"It's a good movie and the special effects are amazing."

"I agree." He nodded while giving her a furtive look. "I have to say that is one of the qualities I place in mortals. Their films are interesting "

"Mm-hm."

Finally, he looked at her more closely. She had washed her hair, it was blazing and glowing with health again. He wanted to run his hand between them to break the overly perfect waves they were making. She caught him staring at her and they froze looking at each other.

"How was your shower?"

She blinked returning her attention to the television. "Nice, I really needed it."

"You are hungry ?"

She nodded without looking at him. "I will order a seafood platter from reception."

When the tray arrived, he placed it on the coffee table so he could eat while watching the movie.  
They sat in pleasant comfort, enjoying juicy oysters. Occasionally sipping French white wine. Barefoot together, the fire crackling in the fireplace. From a distance we would have thought we saw a couple sharing a meal in front of a movie but we could feel a certain tension between the two.

When the last oyster was swallowed up and the film drew to a close, the silence became a heavy presence. Faustus staring at the ceiling. Zelda looked at her fingers, removing those cuticles. Finally, she spoke up, relieving him of the task of doing it himself.

"What are you doing here ?"

"I'm here on business."

She looked at him without believing it. "Is that all? You don't work at the head of a company? I mean, I know this is New Orleans and its not a place to do business but rather to party, is this not ? "

"I know ." He put his chin on his hand, studying it intently. "I guess my job was to find you."

"To save me."

"I don't think you need my help as far as I know but I could be wrong." He shook his head. "I think you have a strength like no one I've ever known. I think I'm here to save your soul. And I think we can find some kind of peace together. You're broken, destroyed by them events and I find it hard to understand how you still stand up to face life. "

Zelda narrowed her eyes, listening to what she thought were lies from her. "The one thing men expect from me is enough to damn any soul many times over. They want my body but not me and you are no different from them."

"Not this time around, darling."

"So why not before? To Greendale? Why didn't you save me from my family then, Brother Faustus? You knew what was going on and you didn't do anything!" She jumped up from the couch and he watched her retrieve cigarettes from her purse by the door.

"Hm?" She was leaning back against the sofa, waiting for an answer, eyebrows raised.  
"So I was a different person, Zelda."

"You are the same to me. Nothing has changed." She exhaled a thick plume of smoke.  
"Appearances can be deceptive. You could say you're the same but your look is dead in your eyes." He took a drink and poured himself some scotch which he drank in one go.

"I can't argue this." She recognized him. "We hid a lot of secrets."

"Who doesn't." He gestured to her with the packet of cigarettes. "Can I ?" She shrugged her shoulders, threw him the package without delicacy, then the golden lighter.

"None of us were who we have been since we were born in Greendale, have we?"  
"You are wrong." She shook her head, her red curls bouncing over those shoulders. "I think most of our families were exactly what they appeared to be. Hilda is kindness embodied. Edward is possessive and bossy as you often tell me." An ironic laugh left those lips painted red.

"Clara."

"Clara was not what we expected." He argued. "We were initially blind to our desire for power that we haven't seen her changed."

"Clara was exactly what she appeared to be." Zelda's insistence was firm, she was fighting tooth and nail to deny it. “She was an innocent, the nicest person I know, even Hilda doesn't match her. And then she was possessed by the devil who ultimately killed her. Your 10 year old sister didn't deserve to die. So. You - "she pointed her finger at him" - were an abject manipulator who only thirsted for power and I admit I wanted it. But from start to finish you amplified it to bend me more to your wishes. And you knew what was going on behind the walls of Spellman Mansion. My parents were monsters. You all knew what they put us through. Their punishments. You swore to get me out of there and you lied. You knew -"

"How about you, Zelda, dear?" He interrupted her in her speech. Although it is difficult to argue with her. He couldn't let her blame him for everything that had happened to her. "Didn't you lie, yourself? Didn't you lie to me more than once to get what you wanted?"

She was appalled, yelled back. "I omitted certain facts from you. Because I adored you! I stupidly believed in you! And you hated that I was running away from you so when I was running away, what could I do but lie to you so that you don't destroy me? ”

She threw a knife at him, which is embedded in the wall. "I foolishly fell in love with you, Brother Faustus."

"Stop calling me that."

"So stop calling me Zelda!" She broke, her mind went into a spin. "You made me to head to toe, after all. You made me another lie. How did you rename me already? Oh, yes! My vicious little thing. You considered me a trophy."

“And I admitted it! I regret that!” His voice rose to match his. They were screaming at the top of their lungs in the room. “I've done terrible things, Zelda.” He pointed out. name to let him know that she was no longer his vicious little thing.

"Yes, I lied. Yes, I was a terrible man. That's why I'm here. But there has to be forgiveness somewhere. We have to let go of the demons that haunt us."

"Demons." Zelda scoffed, circling the couch like a trapped animal, sending her murderous looks. "Demons don't haunt me. Storms haunt me. I can't sleep without the light on. A song makes me cry like a fucking child. The smell of vodka chills me to the bone. I hate the feel of the glass under my palms. I can't be in small spaces. Being alone makes me mad and anxious like a caged animal. "

She leaned back against the couch, supporting herself as her breath caught. "Do you know how long I was in isolation in a cellar because of my father? Do you realize how long you left me there and you didn't mind knowing that I was locked up, wasn't I? "

He closed his eyes. "I tried to get you out of there but how could I save you from them."

"Don't tell me you couldn't, Faustus Blackwood!" She slapped him with all her strength, he didn't flinch. "It never stopped you when you took me away to stay with you, locked in your manor at your mercy. Like I'm an animal! You turned my brain around, leaving me in between claws of your enemies like an offering for me to appease your differences! Do you know what they wanted to do to me? "

"No !" He stood, leaning into her personal space now. Their lips almost brushing. "I have an idea of what they wanted, Zelda! I myself was an idiot who had no regard for you but not anymore! You were only a tool in my eyes. A toy. that I could have! ”He spat. Looking away from her, embarrassed by her reaction.“ I was different too. In many ways."

"Bullshit !"

"I have come for you!" His throat hurts now, tight with tears that were beyond his control. "It was your advice I asked for when I got to know the truth. The truth about Clara. When she-"

"You mean when you gave your soul to the devil?" She smirked sickly at the thought that he no longer had any.

"That wasn't how it turned out." A growl. His stomach was still tormented to think about it ...  
"Why don't you tell me what it was, Faustus?" She was sitting now. Lit another cigarette.

"I always wondered what you would be helpless, not being able to escape. Were you on drugs? Did you cry out in pain? Whisper the resistance as it removed your soul from your body shell -"

"It was the worst thing in the world, Zelda!" The walls shook when he spoke. “She climbed on top of me and made me scream in pain as she split my body in half. Her eyes were black as evil. I couldn't fight her! I couldn't resist! It was not Clara, it was not my sister and you are well aware of that. He was a demon and as much it hurts me, I admit that it destroyed me to see her like that. Made me helpless." He shivered as he thought of his adorable sister's face covered by his blood.

"Well, welcome to the People's Club being tortured by members of their families." Zelda sat on the couch, settling down and smoking as she watched him. He seemed almost happy to see her so gathered again.

He rubbed his head in frustration, running his hands through his slicked back hair, his stomach knotted at their confrontation. "It's a devastating feeling. I'm sorry you are also a victim, Zelda." She lit the cigarette for the third time in a short period of time. " It happens. Especially in families like ours. "

"Does your father ever have -"

"No. But my father's friends have tried to touch me before." She quickly closed that line of questioning. "They have tried several times, however." Her eyes drifted closed, remembering. "They beat me badly. Stripped me like a doll and they tried to fuck me like a worthless whore. And I stabbed them with daggers that I keep on me."

She smiles sadly. "I wish I had killed my father too."

Faustus sat down next to her, their eyes fixed on the front. Put him hands flat on her thigh, stroking her because it had always soothed her and seemed to be working again. "I regret beyond words what I did, Zelda. That I destroyed you because of the possessiveness of the time."

"Adrien was my friend." She suddenly insisted on the word "friend". "I would have cried for him. I would never have hurt him. I should have protected him better." Tears choked her and blurred her vision. "I loved Adrien. He always treated me kindly and respected me like no one has ever done. He protected me from my parents by interposing himself between them and me. He saved me many times of certain death. That's why you killed him. Because he protects me from you and you can't stand my escape from you. "

"I'm sorry for him. Really"

"I would have mourned him if we had even found her body." The anger drained her and it was sadness that took over. Tears streaked her face freely. She wiped them off with her thumbs

When suddenly the windows of the entire hotel room broke. Eleanor screamed and Zelda ran to pick up her daughter from the bedroom.

“Faustus! We have to get out of here quickly! I'm afraid he's found me. "

She begins to take these suitcases and Faustus does the same although he does not understand the situation.

" Who are you talking about ? And why do we have to leave? "

“I'll tell you later. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that despite the wait you are still here and leaving comments and kudos because it makes me happy. Have a nice day ❤️

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on insta (@ Bleu.November) to follow the updates and other things 😊❤️


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